my moms friends boxer. when i was like 4 the dog bit me on the cheek, and not like a little nibble or anything, but like a whole bite. i’m 19 now and still have a scar from it

Any public bathroom, really

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Last Resort, Submarine tv show with Andre Braughr, great fun

Superstore 😓

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Wilhelm Scream. I found it funny when I first learned about it. It just pisses me off now

Also, if you are an attractive woman or black, don't run upstairs if a killer is chasing you

My brain

And it shows a lack of good Responsibility having sex?

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This is how I did it. And unfortunately, the next thing I fixated on wasn't really any better. I had to just keep finding different things to fixate on until I was left with healthier options. It does work, but it may be a slow process

Rubbing balm on grandma's teats.

The Aussie Army was taking horrendous losses at the hands (okay, talons) of the Emu Horde. It wasn't common knowledge at the time because newspapers weren't on site to report, but surrender was necessary before the defeat became too obvious to deny.

Probably Emma Watson.

Finally, now we can watch porn together!

A men's lactation help channel

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Neighbor's pet raccoon.

Being a simp is romantic.

As a father, I can understand the challenges that come with raising a child with disabilities. My heart goes out to all parents who face these difficulties every day.

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Keep your head up. Never walk around looking down. Said to me by a custodian at my previous job. Wonderful man.

I would say “hold on , when did I get a girlfriend?”

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If you can afford it, never, as long as you expect them to pay you back (in a reasonable way) after they live on their own.