Recent comments in /f/Jokes
False_Length_3765 t1_j1njq32 wrote
Reply to What nationality is Santa? by r1ckj0526
Can confirm. Saw him yesterday here in North Poland.
FreezeProduct t1_j1nj2ui wrote
Reply to comment by Chevy530 in I was on a date and she said you smell nice, what have you got on? by TaylorFujii
Prettig kerstfeest 🤩
Dry_Proposal_932 t1_j1nixgo wrote
Reply to Yo mama so fat.. by johnwick76
She has thyroid problems
MadAdam88 t1_j1ngmfb wrote
Reply to The fuse had blown on a lamp I was throwing away and my mother suggested I give it to a charity shop by Coniix
Give it to me, or as a boomer would say "Socket to me, baby!"
[deleted] t1_j1ngb3h wrote
Reply to comment by nimitzhunter in My wife: "I regret getting you that blender for Christmas" by MEforgotUSERNAME
[removed]
officiallyalex69 t1_j1ng3is wrote
Reply to comment by RadioactiveX02 in I had a blind date by BowelMovementator
She didn’t
Valuable_Society_902 t1_j1ng2g5 wrote
Reply to I had a blind date by BowelMovementator
Great thanks that had me
HopeFox t1_j1nfd6v wrote
Reply to What do you call a person who keeps on talking after everyone's lost interest? by old_farmer
A bankruptcy administrator?
ImportedBavarian t1_j1nf16m wrote
Reply to I had a blind date by BowelMovementator
Carrying a gun too, Brad Arm Pitt.
Capable-Site-301 t1_j1neoo9 wrote
Reply to What do you call a person who keeps on talking after everyone's lost interest? by old_farmer
Donald J. Trump.
ikilledsupermario t1_j1nenc4 wrote
Reply to comment by TarzanCar in I was on a date and she said you smell nice, what have you got on? by TaylorFujii
Keep your Richard in a bad habit.
ImportedBavarian t1_j1ndmjm wrote
Reply to Yo mama so fat.. by johnwick76
Yo mama is so ugly, taxes evade HER.
Charlie_2504 t1_j1ndbbb wrote
Reply to comment by paries127 in My wife said that if I got her any more stupid gifts she'd burn it. by GayRacoon69
Fr
ShokaLGBT t1_j1ncokr wrote
Reply to comment by mmo4btc in Why is Santa's sack so big? by MegaGrimer
This is why we don’t celebrate Christmas. Santa banned
lililukea t1_j1nbwfy wrote
Reply to comment by marco-polo-123 in I was on a date and she said you smell nice, what have you got on? by TaylorFujii
Dammit, if I had the money to award this comment
ImportedBavarian t1_j1nbpq1 wrote
Reply to What do you call a person who keeps on talking after everyone's lost interest? by old_farmer
Still better to lose some interest than the principal.
Sir_Clicks_a_Lot t1_j1naw2h wrote
A young man moved into a new apartment on his own, and went to the lobby to put his name on his mailbox.
While there, an attractive young lady came out of the apartment next to the mailboxes wearing a robe.
The boy smiled at the young woman and she started a conversation with him.
As they talked, her robe slipped open, and it was obvious that she had nothing else on. The poor kid broke into a sweat trying to maintain eye contact. After a few minutes, she placed her hand on his arm and said, "Let's go to my apartment, I hear someone coming."
He followed her into her apartment; she closed the door and leaned against it, allowing her robe to fall off completely. Now nude, she purred at him, "What would you say is my best feature?" Flustered and embarrassed, he finally squeaked, "It's got to be your ears!"
Astounded, and a little hurt she asked, "My ears? Look at these breasts; they are full and 100% natural! I work out every day! My butt is firm and solid! Look at my skin - no blemishes anywhere! How can you think that the best part of my body is my ears?"
Clearing his throat, he stammered, "Outside, when you said you heard someone coming? That was me.
tomatoaway t1_j1nahvl wrote
Reply to comment by Pinata_Econonics in I was on a date and she said you smell nice, what have you got on? by TaylorFujii
Very brittle and crackly today, eh?
Gilgamesh72 t1_j1nae69 wrote
Reply to comment by Photograph_Fluffy in I was on a date and she said you smell nice, what have you got on? by TaylorFujii
It’s only 6” but it smells like a foot
My_Balls_Itch_123 t1_j1na48g wrote
Reply to comment by marco-polo-123 in I was on a date and she said you smell nice, what have you got on? by TaylorFujii
There's 12 inches of global warming right outside my door that I'm going to have to shovel away.
Bruhdale-dingle t1_j1n9rq3 wrote
Reply to Why is Santa's sack so big? by MegaGrimer
… so that’s why snow is white
dexidrone t1_j1n7ssf wrote
Reply to What do you call a person who keeps on talking after everyone's lost interest? by old_farmer
You've obviously never been to a bar.
[deleted] t1_j1n7fdy wrote
Reply to I had a blind date by BowelMovementator
[deleted]
johnnydarko- t1_j1n6z0i wrote
Reply to comment by hellomichelle87 in I was on a date and she said you smell nice, what have you got on? by TaylorFujii
More like BOING
svh01973 t1_j1nk27w wrote
Reply to I was on a date and she said you smell nice, what have you got on? by TaylorFujii
My father was fond of saying this when women commented on his cologne!