Recent comments in /f/Jokes
mpwalters t1_j2el2v3 wrote
I'm on Reddit. What do you think I'm doing?
TheHylkos t1_j2el1bi wrote
Reply to comment by enoughPhase752 in What is-hands down- the best time on the clock? by Arkvoodle42
I want you at my next birthday party.
EatCrud t1_j2ekxiv wrote
I wrote a book that sold a million copies. If you would like to purchase one, I happen to have a million copies.
Kcrick722 t1_j2ekvyv wrote
Mary had a little lamb She tied it by the heater Every time it turned around It burnt its little peter
Narrheim t1_j2ektj4 wrote
Reply to comment by zoombazoo in A man goes before Saint Peter... by SchwarzeHaufen
Don´t ask questions like this if you don´t want to get missing too!
adkMathCSProf t1_j2ekslu wrote
Oo__II__oO t1_j2ekrg0 wrote
Reply to comment by Narrheim in A man goes before Saint Peter... by SchwarzeHaufen
Coroner's report: Fell four stories to his death, from bus window
Imposseeblip t1_j2eko6j wrote
Reply to comment by Beneficial_Bug5715 in Police found a large number of dead crows on the A251 just outside Ashford yesterday morning, and there was concern that they may have died from Bird Flu... by mykeuk
It's what we in the UK call semis.
Brewtality76 t1_j2eknly wrote
Reply to comment by sittinginaboat in Vladimir Putin loses his favorite watch by nostopthoughts
Dear Autocorrect,
I have never meant to type the word duck. Please get your ship together.
EddieG11 t1_j2eklof wrote
Reply to comment by Perturabo_IVth in An LGBQT cruising ship sinks in the middle of the ocean. Who survives? by damluk
Jokes just jokes
Imposseeblip t1_j2ekj3z wrote
Reply to comment by daringlyMellow442 in Police found a large number of dead crows on the A251 just outside Ashford yesterday morning, and there was concern that they may have died from Bird Flu... by mykeuk
I did too lol. Was plausible because I live in the area lol.
zoombazoo t1_j2ek8o7 wrote
Reply to comment by Narrheim in A man goes before Saint Peter... by SchwarzeHaufen
Did he get fucked up the ass by a man dressed as god?
[deleted] t1_j2ejspy wrote
Reply to comment by [deleted] in What do you call an event where a likely sexual predator puts on a dress and reads stories to children? by Hitler_the_Painter
[removed]
Bigislandmike222 t1_j2ejqtn wrote
Reply to If you put Holy Water in a humidifier by kearnel81
Oh? I would’ve guessed “holy smoke”
Malvastor t1_j2ejnbi wrote
Reply to comment by letsgobranden0167 in A man goes before Saint Peter... by SchwarzeHaufen
>communication is bad
Very true, this is why I never talk to people.
iknowthisischeesy OP t1_j2ejn7a wrote
Reply to comment by mdg1775 in Make sure to poop before midnight on 31st December. by iknowthisischeesy
Diarrhea on 31st. Hell yeah!!
mdg1775 t1_j2ejklg wrote
I never take old sh!t into a new year!
TNCNguy t1_j2eix6m wrote
Reply to A man goes before Saint Peter... by SchwarzeHaufen
My grandmother is like this. (My family is Palestinian). She was born in the city of Jerusalem, 1945. When she was born, it was part of the British Empire. In 1948, she was given Jordanian citizenship because the city was controlled by Jordan. In 1960, she moved to America and became a US citizen. In 1967, Israel took control of Jerusalem. My grandmother can not legally visit the place she was born! (Israel recently changed the law so no one with Palestinian or Jordanian citizenship can visit Israel). That’s right folks. America gives billions of dollars to Israel every year. But even if you are an American citizen and was BORN in Jerusalem, you can not visit Jerusalem
wildadragon t1_j2eiwwh wrote
If you start your poop at 11:59PM it'll be same shit different year.
1_Shanel t1_j2eio82 wrote
Why can’t I grasp this
___Phreak___ t1_j2eiizx wrote
Reply to comment by [deleted] in What is-hands down- the best time on the clock? by Arkvoodle42
Submitted phrased better originally too
ILoveLongDogs t1_j2eiiih wrote
Reply to comment by CDude78 in Police found a large number of dead crows on the A251 just outside Ashford yesterday morning, and there was concern that they may have died from Bird Flu... by mykeuk
They expressed an opinion about a joke. If you believe that's "aggression and hate", I feel sorry for you. They weren't very nice about it, and I believe they're wrong, but this is still an extreme reaction.
BBQDinosaurChops t1_j2eic3c wrote
LOL
ChiefScout_2000 t1_j2eibqv wrote
Reply to comment by Buck_Thorn in Police found a large number of dead crows on the A251 just outside Ashford yesterday morning, and there was concern that they may have died from Bird Flu... by mykeuk
If he had said Hwy 401 or I75 then the crow would have to not shout "Truck"
Altruistic-Rip4364 t1_j2el73s wrote
Reply to Make sure to poop before midnight on 31st December. by iknowthisischeesy
No matter how hard you try, you take some shit with you