Recent comments in /f/Jokes
Negative-Ad-6533 t1_j2f0o4d wrote
A 2023 XL version of a platypus
ADarkDraconis t1_j2f06f9 wrote
Reply to comment by Nuh-unh in A man walks into a department store by sunflour4
Strapless ftw!
1093i3511 t1_j2ezxle wrote
Here.... scan this qr code. And you'll see if this joke / your autobiography has been already claimed and sold as an NFT.
InspectorG-007 t1_j2ezxa2 wrote
Reply to comment by Mungo_Clump in An LGBQT cruising ship sinks in the middle of the ocean. Who survives? by damluk
No, actually it was Strait.
Candan55 t1_j2ezv8e wrote
Reply to comment by Buck_Thorn in Police found a large number of dead crows on the A251 just outside Ashford yesterday morning, and there was concern that they may have died from Bird Flu... by mykeuk
I mean, why not just call it the Faversham Road?
IamImposter t1_j2ezsu5 wrote
Reply to comment by LeFondonn in Police found a large number of dead crows on the A251 just outside Ashford yesterday morning, and there was concern that they may have died from Bird Flu... by mykeuk
Ed Truck.
His cappa was detated
ASK_IF_IM_PENGUIN t1_j2ezs3u wrote
I think that's a Jimmy Carr joke.
He said he thinks he's already written and said the joke which will end his career. Considering he weathered the storm about not paying taxes that's going to be an exceptional joke.
billnowak65 t1_j2ezdyd wrote
Rectum, damn near killed em.
MathyB t1_j2ezbir wrote
Reply to Police found a large number of dead crows on the A251 just outside Ashford yesterday morning, and there was concern that they may have died from Bird Flu... by mykeuk
Ackshually, crows, like ravens, can talk, so they could say "Lorry".
nnn_rrr t1_j2ez74s wrote
Lost my watch at a party once. Saw a guy stepping on it while sexually harassing a girl. I walked up to the dude, punched him straight in the nose. No one does that to a girl, not on my watch.
Shaomoki t1_j2ez5ml wrote
Reply to Police found a large number of dead crows on the A251 just outside Ashford yesterday morning, and there was concern that they may have died from Bird Flu... by mykeuk
I've read this entire joke before, but the setup takes place in Boston, because Boston accented crows pronounce Car as Cah and keep getting hit.
Cultural_Attitude_42 t1_j2ez1fi wrote
Reply to comment by 31spiders in Police found a large number of dead crows on the A251 just outside Ashford yesterday morning, and there was concern that they may have died from Bird Flu... by mykeuk
I'm 30 hours from there... Lol
NDodma01 t1_j2eyzxi wrote
Reply to comment by HunkyMonk in As the alien onslaught continued, linguists were working furiously to translate the only message they’d received in response to our plea to understand why they were attacking. by RibaldPancake
Not an elbow bump - covid and all
nnn_rrr t1_j2eywjt wrote
The KGB, the FBI and the CIA are all trying to prove that they are the best at catching criminals.
The Secretary General of the UN decides to give them a test. He releases a rabbit into a forest and each of them has to catch it.
The CIA goes in. They place animal informants throughout the forest. They question all plant and mineral witnesses. After three months of extensive investigations they conclude that rabbits do not exist.
The FBI goes in. After two weeks with no leads they burn the forest, killing everything in it, including the rabbit, and they make no apologies. The rabbit had it coming.
The KGB goes in. They come out two hours later with a badly beaten bear. The bear is screaming: "Okay! Okay! I'm a rabbit! I'm a rabbit!"
JamesLeBond t1_j2eyt9c wrote
Reply to What do you call an event where a likely sexual predator puts on a dress and reads stories to children? by Hitler_the_Painter
Get into your tanks men!
I'll get my coat...
31spiders t1_j2eyrqh wrote
Reply to comment by Cultural_Attitude_42 in Police found a large number of dead crows on the A251 just outside Ashford yesterday morning, and there was concern that they may have died from Bird Flu... by mykeuk
Well I’m in PA but….I do watch a lot of Mahkie Mahk movies…Ted is the best!
fromhelley t1_j2eyqq4 wrote
Reply to comment by CaliBigWill in My grandpa was a hunter of moose between the 60’s and 70’s. He killed 47 moose in 69 by [deleted]
Someone changed it to Moose for him because he was too young to know about the cougars yet!
DallasBellaOnlyFans t1_j2eypud wrote
OverallManagement824 t1_j2eyjop wrote
Reply to What do you call an event where a likely sexual predator puts on a dress and reads stories to children? by Hitler_the_Painter
Savage! I like it!!!
drubbo t1_j2eyhi1 wrote
Reply to What do you call an event where a likely sexual predator puts on a dress and reads stories to children? by Hitler_the_Painter
The event would be mass though? Church is the building where the event takes place.
keyboardstatic t1_j2eycaj wrote
I always prefer to talk up to be people. Because lying down is difficult. Lol
Jellodyne t1_j2ey9qt wrote
Reply to comment by GreenrabbE99 in Police found a large number of dead crows on the A251 just outside Ashford yesterday morning, and there was concern that they may have died from Bird Flu... by mykeuk
He could just start hewing them left and right
Lycaeides13 t1_j2ey69m wrote
Reply to Police found a large number of dead crows on the A251 just outside Ashford yesterday morning, and there was concern that they may have died from Bird Flu... by mykeuk
I've seen the same joke based around Boston
StormblessedFool t1_j2ey58n wrote
Reply to Police found a large number of dead crows on the A251 just outside Ashford yesterday morning, and there was concern that they may have died from Bird Flu... by mykeuk
To fellow Americans: Lorry is British for Semi-Truck
AbradolfLinckler t1_j2f0uen wrote
Reply to Police found a large number of dead crows on the A251 just outside Ashford yesterday morning, and there was concern that they may have died from Bird Flu... by mykeuk
I heard this joke made with locations in Massachusetts, USA because of their accents.