Recent comments in /f/Jokes

jpetraco t1_j2fiuvn wrote

Reply to Why did the chicken cross the mobius strip? by NSCButNotThatNSC

How to prove any theorem:

Proof by vigorous handwaving: authority trumps all

Proof by forward reference: reference is usually to a forthcoming paper of the author, which is often not as forthcoming as at first.

Proof by funding: three different government agencies can‘t go wrong

Proof by example: the case n = 2 works, therefore every case works

Proof by omission: ‟The reader may easily supply the details”

Proof by lack of space: I can prove it, but it is too big to fit it in the margins

Proof by deferral: we will prove it later

Proof by picture: basically proof by example+

Proof by intimidation: of course it is true, stupid

Proof by seduction: let me be your derivative so I can lie tangent to your curves

Proof by cumbersome notation: we can easily prove (1-a^2 )/((1-a e^(-i omega) ) (1-a e^(i omega) )) = 1/(1-a e^(-i omega) )+(a e^(i omega) )/(1-a e^(i omega) ) by first letting x = e^(i omega) so 1/x = e^(-i omega)

Proof by obfuscation: randomly backtrack and initiate useless circuit logic

Proof by wishful citation: also cite the inverse, converse, and contrapositive from popular literature.

Proof by eminent authority: ‟I saw Karp in the elevator and he said eight-dimensional color cycle stripping was probably NP-complete.”

Proof by personal communication: ‟Eight-dimensional colored cycle stripping is NP-complete [Karp, personal communication].”

Proof by reduction to the wrong problem: to prove the 4-color theorem, we can easily simplify this into a simple quadratic

Proof by importance: if this isn‘t true, the universe as we know it will explode

Proof by accumulated evidence: no one has found a counterexample yet

Proof by theology: mathematics is a field restricted only to the holy

Proof by mutual reference: In reference A, Theorem 5 is said to follow from Theorem 3 in reference B, which is shown to follow from Corollary 6.2 in reference C, which is an easy consequence of Theorem 5 in reference A.

Proof by vehement assertion: it‘s true or you fail

Proof by semantic shift: some of the standard but inconvenient definitions are changed for the statement of the result.

Proof by appeal to emotion: crayon-drawn pictures of cats and dogs are especially helpful

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31spiders t1_j2fitzp wrote

Reply to comment by Cultural_Attitude_42 in Police found a large number of dead crows on the A251 just outside Ashford yesterday morning, and there was concern that they may have died from Bird Flu... by mykeuk

Close, LewisTOWN area is where I’m from. It’s kinda a shithole if you didn’t know. Kinda big Heroin town, we’ve had a few shootings this year, about a week ago some guy “allegedly” shot his girlfriend in the face after work and dumped her body by a boat access area. It’s semi isolated though a SMALL section of town is ghetto w slum lords owning basically everything. That’s where Shootings are happening for the most part. Stay out when it’s dark kinda thing…..but for the size of our town? That shouldn’t be a thing

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