HopefulConcept5447 t1_j52r12k wrote on January 20, 2023 at 12:04 AM

You know why condoms are sold in 3 packs, six pack and 12 packs? 3 packs for high school kids (1 each for Friday Saturday and Sunday) 6 packs are for college kids (1 for each day of the week then they catch up their homework on Sunday), 12 packs are for married guys (1 for January, 1 for February…)

NoSpankingAllowed t1_j52la4n wrote on January 19, 2023 at 11:24 PM

Reply to A hunter shoots himself in the genitals with his shotgun. by littlemissfordy

ROFLMFAO

No-Relation2437 t1_j52khqe wrote on January 19, 2023 at 11:18 PM

Reply to comment by Poncherelly in I’m bisexual by ThebirdGretel

My mom told me this as "Your dad and I have oral sex. We pass each other in the hall and say 'fuck you'."

Not enough therapy in the world for her using that joke.

Downtown-Custard5346 t1_j52ijz7 wrote on January 19, 2023 at 10:59 PM

Reply to I’m bisexual by ThebirdGretel

Someone called me bisexual once, I reminded them I'm trisexual, I'll try anything

upmxna t1_j52if24 wrote on January 19, 2023 at 10:58 PM

Reply to comment by No-Orchid5378 in I’m bisexual by ThebirdGretel

But you didn’t include the marriage part of the original “joke,” which is essential to the punchline.

A better delivery of that joke would’ve been:

Some of us can’t get any; we’re called “husbands.”

No-Orchid5378 t1_j52gy5c wrote on January 19, 2023 at 10:49 PM

Reply to comment by upmxna in I’m bisexual by ThebirdGretel

Married men don’t have sex, come on man. What rock do you live under?

upmxna t1_j52gffj wrote on January 19, 2023 at 10:45 PM

Reply to comment by No-Orchid5378 in I’m bisexual by ThebirdGretel

What’s the joke?

No-Orchid5378 t1_j52f5jq wrote on January 19, 2023 at 10:37 PM

Reply to comment by upmxna in I’m bisexual by ThebirdGretel

No it’s called a joke. Jokes are supposed to be misleading 😂 If they weren’t they’d be called facts and be funny less often.

XenosapianRain t1_j52eqcg wrote on January 19, 2023 at 10:34 PM

Reply to I’m bisexual by ThebirdGretel

I'm bisexual. So ugly I have to buy it!

GrumpyCatStevens t1_j52eeiq wrote on January 19, 2023 at 10:32 PM

Reply to I’m bisexual by ThebirdGretel

I'm bisexual. If I want sex badly enough, I'll buy it.

NDodma01 t1_j52d1ol wrote on January 19, 2023 at 10:23 PM

Reply to I’m bisexual by ThebirdGretel

That’s nothing. I know someone who’s trisexual.

Dizz2K7 t1_j52cfjo wrote on January 19, 2023 at 10:19 PM

Reply to I’m bisexual by ThebirdGretel

I'm bisexual, too. Problem is, I'm broke.

upmxna t1_j5256yq wrote on January 19, 2023 at 9:32 PM

Reply to comment by No-Orchid5378 in I’m bisexual by ThebirdGretel

Well then it’s misleading to say that you “can’t“ get any. Are you talking like impotence or something?

No-Orchid5378 t1_j52530j wrote on January 19, 2023 at 9:31 PM

Reply to comment by upmxna in I’m bisexual by ThebirdGretel

My problem is that I’m married. It’s a sex problem, I like being married otherwise

akirabs10 t1_j524xnh wrote on January 19, 2023 at 9:30 PM

Reply to I’m bisexual by ThebirdGretel

and I have to buy it....

upmxna t1_j524st9 wrote on January 19, 2023 at 9:29 PM

Reply to comment by No-Orchid5378 in I’m bisexual by ThebirdGretel

I would start with going to the gym. Eat better (diet is HUGE). Get fit. Even if your face is ugly, a ripped body will massively improve your prospects, along with your confidence (which will improve your prospects even more).

Wear unwrinkled clothes. Shower every day and keep your facial hair groomed neatly. Find a nice fragrance. Women LOVE that shit!

Am I following any of this advice for myself? NO