Recent comments in /f/Jokes
Not-Jesus666 t1_j5s4b6x wrote
Reply to comment by c0dyw0dy27 in My girlfriend poked me in the eyes... by c0dyw0dy27
IcyPound3552 t1_j5s42wa wrote
You forgot bitter
Hosentaschen_Mike t1_j5s3qt4 wrote
Reply to I like my coffee like I like my women, by RandoEncounter
Sweet and hot, with a nutty flavour and causing a nervous breakdown
[deleted] t1_j5s2z8p wrote
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NGEFan t1_j5s1yr0 wrote
Reply to comment by leftistpropaganja in I like my coffee like I like my women, by RandoEncounter
Bottomless? Mcds be charging me 4 bucks for one cup
HoodooSquad t1_j5s1ngj wrote
Reply to What's brown and sticky? by JRP1138
What’s brown and really sticky?
A tree
[deleted] t1_j5s1lto wrote
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Am_I_Not_A_Robot t1_j5s1l2h wrote
Reply to comment by Ok-Resist-556 in My girlfriend poked me in the eyes... by c0dyw0dy27
My girlfriend asked me to give her 12 inches and make her bleed. So I f@*ked her twice and punched her in the nose!
DieFlavourMouse t1_j5s1657 wrote
Reply to comment by gotbetterbro in My friend claims that understanding a Fibonacci sequence is hard, but I disagree. by porichoygupto
Great explanation. I'm no mathematician but I recently stumbled down a wondrous rabbit hole and this is probably the best place to share it.
"A Handbook of Integer Sequences" Fifty Years Later
And, The Online Encyclopedia of Integer Sequences itself.
zipadyduda t1_j5s11vy wrote
Reply to comment by c0dyw0dy27 in My girlfriend poked me in the eyes... by c0dyw0dy27
And put her hand karate chop style in front of her nose?
DieFlavourMouse t1_j5s0mlz wrote
Reply to comment by RecalcitrantHuman in My friend claims that understanding a Fibonacci sequence is hard, but I disagree. by porichoygupto
>Are we just gonna gloss over how we get from 0 to 1?
In the beginning there was nothing...
leonscum t1_j5s0k4h wrote
Reply to What's brown and sticky? by JRP1138
What's long, brown, and smelly?
​
The Mississippi.
sirhandstylepenzalot t1_j5rzzmx wrote
Reply to comment by arbitor86 in My girlfriend poked me in the eyes... by c0dyw0dy27
acquiesced
[deleted] t1_j5rzyk0 wrote
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arbitor86 t1_j5rzko3 wrote
Reply to comment by sirhandstylepenzalot in My girlfriend poked me in the eyes... by c0dyw0dy27
Or aqueous humor?
Kind_Bullfrog_4073 t1_j5ryrfq wrote
You use one to pick up eggs and the other to avoid them.
Nomadicarpenter t1_j5ryjf1 wrote
Reply to I like my coffee like I like my women, by RandoEncounter
Fat and bitter.
newjersey238 t1_j5ryeri wrote
Reply to My friend claims that understanding a Fibonacci sequence is hard, but I disagree. by porichoygupto
I only know about the sequence thru the episode of Criminal Minds with guest star Jason Alexander. Thanks goes to you Dr. Spencer Reid!
leonscum t1_j5rxply wrote
I park my car in the front and my condom in the ... well, you know.
[deleted] t1_j5rxla8 wrote
Reply to My girlfriend poked me in the eyes... by c0dyw0dy27
Say it like Jimmy Carr
My girlfriend poked me in the eye
[pause] Last time I give her head (sour tone)
[pause] She’s getting snipped this weekend (upbeat)
Round-Ad-692 t1_j5rvegm wrote
Reply to comment by Chief_Beef_ATL in What do you call a farm of sleepy cows? by Squee3ds
OP said yandere to another commenter, which is sort of a stalker that puts on a sweet mask to their beloved (who they are obsessed with) but easily shifts to violence and display psychopathic tendencies.
It’s a portmanteau of the Japanese words “yanderu” (to be sick), and “deredere” (used as “lovestruck”) so essentially “lovesick” or “sick love”
ReadyTadpole1 t1_j5ruzct wrote
Reply to comment by howcoolisthisname in What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? by kipling_sapling
The best kind of correct.
ajaxraccoon t1_j5rulgt wrote
Reply to comment by IndyAndyJones7 in My girlfriend poked me in the eyes... by c0dyw0dy27
Well, it’s not like they’ll see it🤨
anally_ExpressUrself t1_j5ruh3v wrote
Reply to comment by c0dyw0dy27 in My girlfriend poked me in the eyes... by c0dyw0dy27
Never wrestle with a pig. You get disgusting, and the pig likes it.
Similar advice applies to this whole long thread.
Vast_Cricket t1_j5s4jqe wrote
Reply to A teenager brings her new boyfriend home to meet her parents. by AralphNity
Ha ha ha