Nod, and let them continue. Needs someone to listen more than anything else, probably doesn’t need “solutions “ at that moment.

I learned nothing in school, including this

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If that is what you want?

Get a quality cooler. Make and freeze some soup in mason jars and use them as ice packs in the cooler (works with other frozen meals as well). You can even just freeze water. Pack sandwiches, hard cheeses, fruit, yogurt, ready to eat oatmeal in the cooler. You can also bring nuts, granola, etc. Eat in order of perishability. Most hotels have a mini fridge and even a microwave in the room.

Yes?

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Just look them in they eye.. if you do that genuinely without thinking of what you want to say, the right response will come. (Notice I didn't say "the right words will come.")

With a question mark?

You’re welcome 😉

4 of us got tired of giant bully Tommy . So Roland made a plan and we tricked ,trapped and tied Tommy with a long rope and hung him over the edge of the hill which was scary high and steep..if anyone knows the Santa Fe R.R. in Barstow that is the place where we made Tommy think he was about to be killed. After we scared the soul out of him for over a hour and he was broken and crying like the little girl he really was, we let him live. He changed after that day. Years later us 4 were glad we let him live because he became a good person and a close friend like a brother to us. A totally different one from riverside drive in Barstow thought he could own my sister and treat her however he wanted. Somehow he got kidnapped and roasted out in the Desert. But thats all I'll say about that.

Thank you

I found this video on empathy from Brené Brown to be extremely helpful. It’s short, about 2 1/2 mins.

Just to reiterat/clarify…do not gift/delivery anything personally if it’s not “factory sealed” so to speak.

You can ask questions directly like:

"do you want me to talk or do you just need me to listen?"

"Do you want advice or someone to listen"

You can listen and repeat back what they say to really understand their problem:

"So you are having trouble with x"

You can do your best to empathize:

"That sounds so tough I'm sorry"

Or, alternatively, you can put up a personal boundary:

"Hey, I'm really sorry, that sounds tough but I really don't have the capacity to help/listen right now"

From there you can maybe point them to someone who can help

"I do know of this resource you could maybe try"

Home prices are climbing, but I'm hoping the interest rates will come down some before I'm ready to buy. 4.7% doesn't sound like much, but for a 30 year mortgage you end up paying about double the principal during the course of the loan due to interest. I'm shooting for a high down payment since my rent is low rn, but it's a bitch if you have high rent and HCOL. Shortening the loan term would help some with interest, but it isn't an option for everyone when the principal (and therefore mortgage payments) are so high.

Interest is brutal and the housing market is a mess.

Ask them. No really, ask “are you looking for advice or my opinion, or did you just need to get that out?”

I often kindly ask if they want to vent and just need someone to listen or want advice and that helps me determine how to respond.

"I have sympathy for you."

The best time to break the ice is immediately

"This is hard/difficult for you"

Can you find small businesses or non-profits and try to do some pro-bono or cheap work to build up experience for your resume, as well as connections?

Back where I'm from it's called getting a lickin' ..I was on the west coast not long ago and some big dummy started talking shit so I warned him. I told him meet me behind the wood shed I was gonna lick his ass good. After I saw the other people looking at me strange I realized how I sounded. I went ahead and just shot him in his leg and left . I never tried to talk like a cowboy after that. If someone ever says something like ' Bo I'm gonna lick you' or 'give you a licken' then your about to get Beat up and stomped a 'mud hole in you. I saw a few cowboy fights in Wichita Falls Texas at Cowboy County bar and line dance place, it's like Gillys from move Urban cowboy . Anyway don't fuck with a Cowboy because when you get outside to fight they are tough mother fuckers. They are really good people who don't look for trouble but like to get drunk and have fun just like everyone else. They are real men and nothing like the punk bitches who attack from behind and gang stomp old people or anyone they think they can victimize. 2 weeks ago A group of about 10 smashed a senior man in his head from behind then 5 kicked and punched him hard in his head and only stopped after blood came from his ears and broke ribs. 2 got caught and said they did it because wanted his bike, which they did get. The senior was a very nice person and collected cans and plastic for a long time and finally bought his hard earned bike a few weeks earlier and those heartless pussies hurt him and got the bike.

It depends whether you want to shorten the conversation or not.

If you want to shorten it just start criticising their actions and advise often and a lot. Otherwise just listen and nod from time to time.