You don't absolutely need to commune regularly, but don't answer his query by you being the one to reject his needs. It's ok to be a loner just as it is to be community oriented. You know nothing about neurotypical mindframes if you are assuming that what that person needs is what works for you. Autism for one can make you diverge strongly and it's ok; just dont' assume the that path those divergences are taking are all the same.

Your derangements are beyond my area of interest and I do rather let whoever falls for the trap of neurotypical mindframes end up suffering its obvious dangers on their own after rejecting my advice. Feel dismissed.

I use meditation.

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That's a bit on the strong side and isolationism for many has its very definite drawbacks. As gregarious beings it's ok for many to feel a need for community.

If one of those friends feels close enough to express these feelings too, do so. Tell them that you enjoy their company and that you'd appreciate them calling you some time. Some people aren't inclined to call and that's just it.

You have to maybe also broaden your circle by finding other board game aficionados or by engaging in other group activities. I often felt as you did, while being the one who himself called to know what was up without really ever organizing anything. But I was always part of a bunch of group activities that led to other activities and being invited to parties and even Xmas. Lots of those people I don't see anymore and it's ok.

You have to realize that people are bustling a lot more than they were in their little villages 500 years ago. Find a place or thing you like and you will find more like minded people.

Religion seems to be dying out, but I still want to mention that maybe you can visit several churches as you get some time. Churches are very social organizations and have friendly people who enjoy newcomers. It is a really good way to meet people and they have quite a few social events to get together. Please don't write off trying them, as I know that they give a sense of belonging to anyone who goes. If one doesn't seem to help you feel less lonely, then certainly try another. People go to church for different reasons, and loneliness is one of them.

Please know that I'm not trying to promote religion here, I am just trying to provide you with some social support. It will help, I promise.

Indeed

people in trauma situations need close bonding, for this reason there are "trauma dogs" (not sure if this is the correct english translation). You are not in trauma but i guess you have one thing in common, you need oxytocin. An easy way to get it without human contact is to get a pet like a dog, cat, hamster oder else.

give it a try with an animal from an animal shelter, if it doesnt work, give it back.

a close contact to an animal works on a much deeper level then any therapy. i can tell since i have 3 cats, good luck

Do not try to climb your way out. Dig deeper. Admit this agonic desire of yours as the mental malaise that has always been.

Abandon them, and know that true happiness does rarely come from things which call us with such unhealthy thirst.

Pick up hobbies that allow you to meet new people. In a different post you talked about having bad hours - you can always do activities with groups on days off or pick up a social game like an MMO or MOBA to play during the work week.

Bond with people at work - bring donuts every Monday or set up game nights or something.

Sadly i work as a train crew member and my shifts are 12h with diffrent hours, i don't want to quit because money is not bad for the country i live in. That shift times makes IT very hard to nawet someone new. These friends i have are from School

Develop more human connections. If current friends aren't covering it, find other activities/groups to expand your network. Reading also might help in the mean time.

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Would you say that popcorn has a lot of excess carbs?

Cut back on carbs like pasta, bread, breakfast cereal, desserts, etc. -- anything with lots of sugar and/or processed flour. Eat more of the good fat like animal fat, olive oil, coconut oil, butter, gee, cocoa butter, Macadamia nuts, walnuts, pecans.

Agreed. You cannot get fat from eating dietary fat which is very high in calories.

Sugar and some non-sugar sweeteners are the primary cause of weight gain. Bear in mind that foods made from processed flour are converted into glucose (a form of sugar) when digested. When your blood sugar level gets too high, your body releases insulin which forces your fat cells to open up and take in all that sugar. Your face looks puffy or chubby because your body is full of inflammation caused by lots of carbs.

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That’s patently false

You mean it’s easy to eat a shit ton of CALORIES when when eating carbs? Carbs are just easier to over eat. It’s much harder to sit down to eat 600 calories of lean, grilled chicken breast (185 calories 4 oz serving size) than it is to eat 600 calories in typical “indulgent/mindless” carbohydrates, such as the aforementioned bread. 4 dinner rolls with 2 tables spoons of butter is easy 600 calories with little to no protein. However, I dare you to eat 600 calories of plain potatoes. It still comes down to overeating eating calories, and skipping skipping carbohydrates is just an easy way to reduce.

Additionally, from my understanding you need to meet a much lower threshold of carbohydrates (sub 30g) to enter ketosis. You can also enter ketosis with time restricted feedings (intermittent fasting) if that is desired.

Michael Phelps- consume 10k calories per day, but he burned it off due to his training. But for the average person who has a 9-5 low intensity job, eating like Phelps will most likely lead to a caloric surplus, which will turn to weight gains.

At the end of the day, calories in calories out. No way around that.

Caloric deficit: lose weight

Caloric maintenance: maintain weight

Caloric surplus: gain weight

Not true. You can eat thousands of calories per day from fruits and olive oil and you won't get fat

I had to educate myself about caloric content in the food I was eating. My wife got me a book called “Eat this not that” which helped a lot (especially at restaurants) but the same information is available all over the internet.

After I tracked my intake for a couple of weeks, I started to know what I was eating, calorie-wise. Then I set a budget of 2000 calories per day, but everyone will need a different number.

I imagine it as having $20 a day to spend on food (1 calorie is 1 cent) and thinking about it like “bargain hunting” helped me find foods I like that were “good deals” calorie-wise.

For example, mayonnaise is a terrible deal (150 cal per 2 tablespoons) , while salsa, mustard, hot sauce, etc are tasty but have few calories.

Like others said, you need to burn more calories than you take in to lose weight, and until you’re honest and accurate about what you’re taking in, the needle isn’t going to move.

This belongs in r/stupidAFlifetips

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