This comment should be way up there. It really is sugar.

My point was that emotion is part of and instrumental to mental health. Just that using it as the core concept is looking at things through a keyhole. As an aside we saw above that it's off-putting to clients too if not introduced delicately and rationally(haha). Indeed emotion will be part of a proper treatment for the issue and is part of everything. Leading with it in the ways seen further up the chain comes off as narrow.

Don't rear end someone. That is a dick move.

This is excellent advice.

I think this is a great way to balance the time dynamic when one partner stays at home and the other doesn't. The sahp gets alone time to do chores and the other parent gets one-on-one time with the kids.

I don't think this is the answer when both parents work outside the house.

If you do laundry 2x per week, is the issue doing laundry or the amount of work clothes they have? You shouldn't have to do laundry 5x per week just for work clothes. Or, if finances are a problem with buying new alternate work clothes, can you work out a system? For example: you do laundry on Sundays and Wednesdays. If they need more, they throw in loads themselves

Great idea, noted for next time, txs!

Not red meat twice a day every day for decades like Americans do.

I often get scared that my wife will be judgemental of my cleaning while I’m cleaning.

Maybe there’s a paranoia that’s stopping you

Supremely dick move.

Don't do this.

I joined a barbershop chorus! They have both men and women versions.

Oh I never even thought of that. By connecting to the frame it takes all those nice crash zones out of the equation so they’re not absorbing any of the impact.

So true. We all need to rest and spend time with loved ones even if we have to put off some things on our to do list.

I hear ya. 😪I have an extremely shy nephew and he said the same thing about sucking at ping pong ect. He's trying but it's not natural for him. But your WANT is the first step, so you'll be fine

Elaborate

Go places without your cellphone

If you see, hear, or read something interesting, make a quick note of it. Especially if you know it's something your friends are interested in. Use that as a list of ideas to pull from. For me this is now a mental list, but when I was really focused on improving I'd actually keep a physical list and give it a quick read before times when I knew I'd need to make conversation. Think of it less as a script, and more a menu of things that happened this week that you could talk about for a minute or two.

If there's a pause in the conversation, you can either ask a question / comment on the previous topic, or use the topic from your list that seems to fit best if it feels like time for a new subject.

Grief comes in waves.

​

It usually takes more than a year, as yearly events trigger memories that we otherwise forget.

​

Oh, it's Easter? The last time we had Easter ____ was with us!
Oh, it's Halloween? The last time....

Oh, I smell cookies baking? The last time...

Each event is like a fresh wave of grief washing over us.

And, if we are healing properly, each repeated wave hits a little less hard.

​

So, 3 years is 3 waves of each type of yearly trigger, and that's quite optimistic for some of the worst losses we might face. 1 year is just too quick for most losses.

Ask questions. People love talking about themselves. Ask questions to increase your knowledge. Use that knowledge to drop bomb ass facts about things later on that nobody asked about. The more the other person is talking, the less you have to anyways.

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For me, it’s because I want something new.

I crave new flavors and textures.

I found relating this to cooking to be a catalyst in slowing down my eating.

Instead of instant gratification, I have to learn to make it. Don’t order it. Don’t have it brought to you. Don’t buy pre packaged.

It changed my relationship with unhealthy eating because it stopped being mindless/cognitively dissonant.

Make the food you want and see how your relationship changes.

ETA: make ANY food you want. Having to be the person who puts a stick of butter into something changes you.

No there isn't. Humans have been eating meat for hundreds of thousands of years.

I overthink what to say, how to say it, whether or not the other person will find someway to keep the conversation going based off what I said, whether it's appropriate to say it, when it's a good time to say something, how I'm actually gonna say it, the tone I'll use... Everything!!! 😂

Yeah, this "saves" the thing that's designed to absorb impact, and puts it on your frame.

Less cosmetic damage, more structural damage.

It's a terrible tradeoff

Wow never knew. I’ll have to make the switch!