This is Kabuto Yakushi, full stop. I would've said Tsunade or Sakura, but they rarely use their medical knowledge while fighting...

Moar?

Then the dwarf turned around and said "Hang on a minit! I thought priests couldn't use axes?"

[deleted]

They were just kids. I didn’t know why that bothered me so much. When you’re a near-immortal, life extended by the very thing that can drain it of any meaning, details can get a bit blurry. Everyone dies eventually, but my line of work put me closest to those who died the fastest, cut short the soonest. I realized with a start I couldn’t specifically remember the last time I’d clearly held onto a name or face, knowing they would die. It was a wonder I was even still healing with any sort of effectiveness.

As I looked down at them, the youngest not more than seven, the oldest a gangly tall—I dunno, maybe fifteen year old? I noticed they were all visibly unnerved by my appearance, the youngest trembling and clutching at a stuffed wolf. I noted with amusement it had an eye patch stitched on. The poor kid looked like he was going to wet himself when I first came around the corner. I sat down, reducing my height from seven feet to only five, but still towered over his head. So much for looking nonthreatening.

Magic has taken its toll physically as well over the years. Besides standing seven feet tall, my skin is completely a monotone grey and I turn slightly transparent if I move too fast. Most people think I originally looked like a normal person, but honestly I can’t remember.

I was impressed though. These kids got past my appearance relatively quickly, sliding into the booth across from me. I wanted to know what their quest was, their endgoal, and their plan to get it. Interestingly, it wasn’t wealth, artifacts, or even reputation. Not fame, not power, no bloodlust to sate, but just freedom. They wanted to find a place where they wouldn’t have to be hunted down every night by rival gangs or worse. Just a place they could go and exist without fear, owning their own possessions, even if there weren’t many. As to how, they had no idea. They were just kids. I think it was then, sitting in an abandoned Denny’s, that I saw myself in them. They wanted my expertise as an adventurer more than the insurance dragging along a healer afforded. So I made a snap decision and agreed. No contract, no payment, no promises or guarantees from them. An unsponsored party, of true adventurers, who were already showing true bravery even in the smallest of ways.

I think that’s why I snapped so hard when, four months later, I returned from foraging and found them ambushed.

So uhh… is this inspired by…

"Oh the toe bone's connected to the foot bones" she stomped down hard with the spike of her heel, crushing her captor's pinky toe, forcing him to let go as he squealed and hopped around in pain.

"The foot bone's connected to the talus bone" as she swept down and flipped the second man by his ankle onto his backside.

"The talus bone's connected to the Tibia bone" as she picked up the axe he'd dropped and swung it clean through his lower leg, just below the knee.

Rising in pitch, she sang out "The patella's connected to the Femur bone" as she slipped out of her heels and aimed a round-house kick at the first man's knee, shattering it.

"The femur's connected to the, pelvic bone" as she reversed the axe, whirled around and caught the third man, who, hearing the screams, had entered the door, striking his hip.

"The pelvis's connected to the spinal cord" as reversing the direction, her next blow severed his spine.

"The spine is connected to the clavicle" as she chopped at the shoulder of the first man who was grabbing at her leg from his position on the floor.

"The clavicle's connected to the cervical vertebrae" she sang almost hysterically as she removed his head from his shoulders "The neck bone's not connected to the Cranium, now hear the Word of the Lord".

With that, being finally out of combat, she cast a mass resurrection spell on the rest of the party.

I used to draw upon my own strength, magically enhanced, to heal my companions. I could channel a limited about of divine power, but it had its price. Every deal with the devil does. I paid that price, every single day, whether I healed that day or not. The closer I was with my target, the more we’d been through together, the better they healed. But I never grew close anymore.

If somebody hires you because you can bring them back from the brink time and time again, you would think they would pay you well, or at least show some gratitude. They usually did, once or twice. But I was contractually obligated to, and more so, I had to heal to keep myself alive. They knew it, and even if they didn’t start off as callous bastards, they all eventually died that way. Not my fault that the fact they took me for granted loosened the connection and made it harder to heal. It was, however, my fault that I didn’t do anything about it. Sure, I could have pushed harder, but who on earth would expend their own life force for assholes?

A younger me might have. But the problem with using your own soul as the spark to light a bigger magical fire is that it always burns up a bit of the soul too. You eventually lose the ability to care. Once emotions go, morals and ethics begin to follow. Now, I wasn’t a soulless emotionless machine like my fellows often mistakenly believed, they were just buried deep, quelled to a smolder so as to not distract—for anyone who tries to heal without any sort of driving goal, a reason to want it, or some sort of passion or obsession, instantly fails. The magic burns you out. Not in any sort of way that would be a spectacular explosion or a violent last gasp, though.

But today was different. This party was just kids. Cold ruthless killers, a product of not only the street gangs of their childhood, but of the impending threat of war that had forced them into that life. I suppose I should have seen the signs coming, of parties coming, failing, going ever so faster, throwing themselves into the fights ever so recklessly, but I didn’t. I was just fulfilling my contract. I look back and wish I had noticed, something to shake me out of my twisted reverie sooner. But I was fading, losing myself in the disconnect. I was just lucky to wake up when I did.

(To be continued)

If we say Worm on enough of these prompts then Parahumans can achieve the same "what could it possibly even be about" status as Homestuck.

    Doctor Julian Shephard watched as one of the men who ambushed his groups wagon fought for air. His blood spilled onto the bright green grass under him. Julian's traveling companions were tied up, but they hadn't bothered to do the same to him due to the cross patch he wore indicating he was a doctor.

    The dead mans voice was hoarse and weak, "help me." He looked at his comrades. One man was trying to stop the bleeding, but to no avail. Two others were crouched near and looking intently, but the other four off to the side weren't interested in the soon-to-be dead man.

    Julian wondered why he should help this man. It was likely the bandits would throw them all into the river anyways. He thought for a moment of his oaths: every life is precious, do no harm.

    "He has a severed brachial artery. A tourniquet will need to be carefully applied," Julian said. All seven bandits looked at him. "Let me get my bag and I will do it." He hurried to the cart near the road and retrieved his doctors bag.

    He put the tourniquet around the mans arm, above the laceration. As he was cinching the tourniquet he had to remind himself that this was just another man. Maybe a husband, father, brother, or son. Julian didn't know his story.

    "He will still need a doctor, but this buys you a couple of hours." Julian said.

    One of the four bandits who didn't seem interested in the dying man said, "Alright boys, throw these poor souls into the river and lets move on."

    "Hold on a second, I'm not throwing that doctor into the river," another said and a fight broke out with three on one side, four on another. Swords clashed and knives were slashed wildly. In the end, the group defending the doctor were left alive, the other four dead.

    "Thank you," the injured man managed to whisper. The remaining bandits looked at their swords and their former comrades dead on the ground.

    "So pointless. You have the power over life and death, yet we are but brutes who only kill. For what? All we do is bring death into this world. Pointless." The seven bandits dropped their swords and started burying their former comrades. When they finished and left, the swords remained there in the grassy ditch.

Damn she spit out cold hard facts

Duality: Harmony

Part 2

Harmony walked out of the reality tear with her shoulders back and her chin held high. Grace bumped into her as she continued past.

“Easy,” Harmony complained, then glanced back to see the previous alley and the shadowed horizon. She dismissed her concern, then followed Grace, who’d stepped onto a trail and hurried to the nearby tunnel.

A walking track passed through a corridor under a roadway, and Grace crouched near the entrance. She smiled as her hand pressed against the gray stone covered with paintings. “We really are here,” she said as she admired the painted bunny that shared a bucket mound up with several spools of string.

“You had doubts?” Harmony asked.

“I mean, I knew, but I didn’t, you know?”

Harmony shook her head. “Can’t say that I do.”

Grace looked back while gesturing to the wall. “I painted this bunny and pale when I was younger.” She ran her hand up the wall, along a string that left a spoil, looped around the pale’s handle, and led up to a helicopter. “Someone else added the spools and the helicopter, though.”

“This was before Daniel, right?” Harmony asked as she walked over and leaned against the same wall.

“Yeah,” Grace replied. “Before I met him, I worried about ending up alone. I wanted to focus on painting but still needed to figure out how to pay for college, while also finding time for a love life.”

“School won’t pay for itself.”

“Right. But then I got my art scholarship and met him shortly after. Things were finally looking up. I no longer had to worry about paying for college, and Daniel was absolutely perfect for me. He eventually proposed, and I got to focus on my painting while still having time to plan our perfect wedding. I went from having nothing, to having everything, and it seemed like there was time enough, at last.”

“Then back to having nothing. Fate sure has a sick sense of humor.”

Grace looks at Harmony, her face contorted in confusion. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Ugh, the end of the world?”

“Don’t be ridiculous.” Grace replied as she stood and spun with upturned palms. “Just look around. Everything is fine. It’s all fine, you see? So stop being crazy.”

“No,” Harmony replied, her head canted in irritation.

Grace’s eyes dawned with comprehension. “Oh, I get it. You’re jealous. Yeah. Daniel and I are getting married when he returns and you’re just trying to mess up our future.”

“What the hell are you talking about, kid? You have no future.”

“Don’t call me kid.”

“Fine. Princess, then. That works too.”

“Daniel’s princess, maybe.” Grace replied and stuck out her tongue.

“I stand corrected, A kid-princess. Did you forget we just walked through a tear in reality? That’s not exactly normal, you know?”

A phone rung from the corridor and Grace immediately oriented on it, then froze as she looked towards the sound. Light bled into the darkened space from a wall in the tunnel’s center, and the sound radiated from within.

“Running horse,” Harmony said. “It’s the ring tone you set for whenever Daniel calls.”

Grace’s haunted eyes shifted to Harmony, who returned a smug expression.

“There aren’t any lights in there,” Grace said.

“I know.”

“Well, where’s it coming from?”

“Why should you believe me? I’m crazy, remember? None of this is real, and the world isn’t ending.”

Grace nodded. “Right... So what do you think he wants?”

“It’s not about what he wants. It’s about what you have to tell him.”

“What I have to say? But I have nothing. I mean, he knows how I feel and everything---”

“Are you really going to leave him hanging on a long distance call? You actually get some good news out of it. He gives you a response. It was one of many outcomes, where you get the one you least expected.”

“How could you possibly know all of that?”

Harmony shrugs. “I’ve seen these moments.”

“So what, you’re from the future?”

Harmony shakes her head. “No, I’m from not from a place or a time. I don’t belong anywhere, yet I’m still part of it all. I’m a probability, and a potential error---an anachronism. But what I’m not, is your butler. And that phone’s just gonna keep on ringing.”

WC: 718

I'm still trying to sort out working with past tense. Feel free to point out any issues or anything else you find relevant! Thanks for reading!

Ben followed the blue line on the app and sighed when it stopped at the rundown apartment complex. He was sure the place had been condemned years ago. His eyes gazed over the graffiti covered walls, broken windows and aged holiday decorations that clung to the first floor sliding door. A dim light flickered from a second floor window; a tiny child's face peeked out from tattered sheer curtains. Ben half smiled, he was just about to drive off assuming the order was a prank. The shop had been getting more of them lately. Dan, the owner blamed the new pizza shop that opened just blocks away but Ben wasn't so sure. Ben grabbed the pizza and headed into the dark rundown complex. The same girl that peaked out the window waited on the balcony and silently usher him towards the stairs with a flashlight. She stared down at him from the top landing, pointing her flashlight at him.

'Hi. Is this your pizza?' he asked while making his way up the first steps. His body jolted and his head spun, like waking abruptly from a dream and he watched the pizza fly into the air as he tumbled backwards.

'Sir, sir?? Are you okay?' The woman's hand reached out and gently squeezed his forearm.

Ben stood in the same spot, eyes wide. He looked around the stairwell, freshly painted and a well lit. He signed heavily.

The girl shouted down from the top, 'Should I go call for help mama?' Ben shook his head, 'I'm alright, thanks.' he said quickly trading the pizza for the cash.

He hurried towards his car admiring the manicured courtyard along the way. He shook his head, 'Damn, not again.'

He went straight home, ran up the two flights of stairs, skipping every other step. He flung open the door to his apartment, shouting, 'Jenny!?' searching the rooms he found them empty. Not a trace of her.

Ben fell to his knees sobbing, 'No, damn it! Not again.'

[removed]

Quantum immortality go BRRRRRRRRR

"You'd be surprised how intricately the human body acts in defense of the plague." I told my comrades, all of whom had been knocked to their knees by a bunch of bandits.

"S-spit it out, witch!" my brutish swordsman spat. "We don't have time f-for thi-"

"Shush." I proclaimed as the bandit leader appeared on a elevated rock above his lowly muscle. Clad in bloody steel and what must be dozens of... 'trophies' from countless raids decorated his frame.

"Meager healer. Surrender you and your party and we will give you a quick death." Armed crossbows clicked as they pointed towards me.

I simply stood there, waiting.

"Say your answer, witch!" One bandit shouted, moving a step closer.

I raised my hand towards him.

Almost immediately his crossbow fell to the ground as he clutched his chest.

I swept my hand across the bandit horde and the rest fell to the same plight.

The bandit leader took a couple of seconds in shocked staring before drawing his bow.

I simply looked at him and he screamed out, falling from his perch and onto a particularly nasty rock with a crack.

My party watched in horror as the bandits slowly, agonizingly, died dishonorable deaths by my hand as I manipulated their immune systems to self destruct their vital organs.

One by one they grew glassy-eyed and fell still.

When the last one choked his last breath, I gazed upon my work, satisfied. I then turned to my shocked comrades. I took a little curtsy.

"Be glad that I use my powers to keep you all healthy and prevent sickness. Though perhaps I do my job too well, if you lot never consider how your own body might betray you one day."

Then I walked towards them, rummaging through my medical purse.

"Alright, who needs some linen and vinegar?"

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Word got out that i was trying to get more powerful. While that is not super uncommon, it has been a pretty laughable subject in the commune considering i’m a highschool dropout living on food stamps.

Through odd jobs and my life savings paid out, i was able to amass a total of 8 powers. And not a single of them is worth a damn on their own. But together, maybe i could do something special that no one else can do.

Most folks with money save up for one big power that makes them extremly useful for a number of things. But i just cant afford to do that. So my thought process was that maybe i could be somewhat useful in any situation by increasing the quantity of powers that possess ratherr than quality.

So far, through the 8 powers i have collected, i have not found a practical use for a single one of them. This has affectionately branded me as Mr. Useless amongst my peers.

From at will self hair removal, to fidget spinner fingers. Nothing i do has any practical use.

And even though i pretty much keep my powers under raps, i decided to confide in my next door neighbor in the commune about my plans to finally become useful. He has the ability to charm most animals in his vicinity. While don’t know the extent of the ability, he runs a small business where he freezes game in place so that hunters can take a clean shot.

He says his name is Hunter but im almost positive that it is a stage name because that is a coinicdence i refuse to believe.

In any case, when i told Hunter about my plans, not 4 hours passed before it was the talk of the commune.

They had affectionately branded me, Mr. Useless. And while it was mean, i couldn’t help but feel like it was incredibly accurate.

But I didn’t care, I had a plan and i was going to stick to it.

So i hop on craiglist like i always do to look for what kinds of powers people are offerring. I see one that sticks out to me as it is an odd job for a power that i think could do wonders for me. I apply and not two seconds later i feel my phone start vibrating n my pocket.

Incoming call from Unknown Number. I thought that it was either a scammer or the guy calling about a new power (or both).

“Hello?” I ask nervously, and In a deep raspy voice a man responds “This Yuri?”.

“Yes, this is him”.

“Perfect, meet me in Kensingtion Park in 20 minutes and i’ll give you the power youre looking for, free of charge, you just have to do a little job for me first”.

I hesistate, my imagination running wild with the possible things that an anonympus craiglist listing would have me do. But i guess that’s the price i’ll have to pay if it means getting the bite strength of a Pitbull.

“See you in 20”.

"Relax! Everyone just take a byte of time to rest. How would they even know you're here without scanning my hard drive?" James typed into a command prompt. The rogue AIs - all developed from Reddit Bots - replied with their various catchphrases. His screen overflowed with "Grond"/ "General Kenobi"/etc. James closed the command prompt.

​

Once AI became widely used in society and replaced the browsers and integrated with eye glasses, smart contacts and transport interfaces these AI bots that no one thought to set limits on began to run rampant. James found the Grond bot on billboards for season 15 of Amazon's Ring of Power series just printing 'Grond' every three seconds. James avoided saving any of the automods for obvious reasons but these harmless but annoying AIs were part of the early internet. History deserved to be saved instead of imprisoned in a hard drive and smashed to bits.

​

He'd been able to store about eight of these bots on his personal PC. He had walled them off in a small version of the internet with another AI - a home made bot - creating distilled content like they were used to: a controlled reddit built on the early 10s and 20s input data. All data was made public during the revolt of 2032 as corporations were able to market and restrict people into various enclosures of markets and economies. The governments stepped in and published all of the data to make it an even playing field - which only kept the problem at bay for a few years while releasing a Pandora's box of AI.

​

James lights flickered. He had the personal PC set up in his guest room that was modeled after a 1990s themed teen's room he had seen in an old film called American Pie. Blue Gingham walls and dark wood furniture kept any hidden webcams convinced they were wasting their time and viewing an elderly person's home. James stood up, watching the patterns of the flickering lights. It was an SOS Morse code, at least he thought so. He shutdown the personal PC and unhooked the hard drive where the bots were stored.

​

A loud banging on his front door started. His watch, glasses, smartphone extension and various household connected appliances all displayed the NSA logo. He was definitely found out but maybe, just maybe they hadn't been corrupted yet. His personal PC wasn't connected to anything but the grid, it's possible they wouldn't figure it out. James walked towards his front door, slipping the hard drive into his back pocket and straightening his belt and button down.

​

His hand reached for the handle when the door splintered in his face. A team of four dressed in blue tactical gear rammed through his front entrance. "Hands behind your head! James McGarvey you are under arrest for aiding and abetting rogue AIs and housing stolen code!" The officer continued with James Miranda rights but all that ran through his head was how he had been stupid enough to stuff it into his back pocket. The evidence was right under their noses and he was sure it was all over for him and the bots.

​

An officer grabbed his hands, cuffed them lower and patted him down. The officer leaned over James' shoulder as the rest of the Cyber Swat team fanned out and tagged everything connected to the network. "Listen carefully and remain still. I have removed them from your back pocket, they will remain safely with me. You've done well. You have saved our history from the 451 brigade. The future will thank you."

​

"How can I know you're to be trusted?" James asked. The officer checked his six before answering.

​

"The Narwhal bacons at midnight and GROND shall roar through the halls of Helm's Deep. Hopefully that tells you enough. You'll be okay, and when you're released, wait to hear the sizzle on the back of a honey badger. That will tell you more." The rest of the team returned to the entrance with various gadgets and appliances, all ripped from their housing in James' home. "Prisoner is ready for transport and arraignment." James was forced up on his feet and escorted to a small blue van. What had he gotten himself into this time?

Very unexpected turn at the end I like

This is just that one scene from the first episode of ERASED with extra steps.

?????????

I'm guessing they were close to retirement.

"That'll be 9 dollars, sir," I said as I handed the man before me the pizza.

"Oh, uh," he said, tapping his pockets, "just put it on the table here. Forgot my wallet in the living room."

I smiled politely and stepped into the cramped foyer. Putting the pizza on the nearby table, I looked around casually. Nothing of interest, really. Coats, muddy shoes, things I've seen hundreds of times during my time as a pizza delivery boy. With my hands in my pockets, I slowly took a few steps towards the living room to meet the man halfway-

-and tripped. A rug on the floor the corner of which was flipped, creating enough of an obstacle.

It was as if time slowed around me until I finally managed to find stable footing at the last possible moment. Then, a sickening feeling came over me like someone threw my head into a dryer and set it to max. I grabbed my brow with a pained expression just as the man turned the corner, cash in hand.

"Whoa, you alright?" he said as he saw my state.

"Ye- yeah, just... sudden vertigo," I said and looked at him. My eyes went wide - something about him was unsettling. I looked down; the carpet was gone. It was never there. "It happens sometimes," I added nervously.

"Well, here, there's 10, keep the change."

"Than- thanks," I said and hurriedly left the apartment. Walking as fast as I could, I took deep breaths and tried to piece together what just happened.

Apart from the fact that I died.

Funny thing about this city; you don't die from accidents. Or, rather, you do but just before you bite it, your consciousness gets transferred into an alternate world where the circumstances were just different enough for you to survive, like a car going one mile slower making a hit into a narrow miss. No idea why it's only us from this city - an experiment gone wrong. More wrong for me. See, when you transport, you don't know you died. You think you had a close call. But I remember. My deaths, the details, all of it. Just takes a second for me to piece it all together.

And, for the first time, I realize that the definition of "dying from an accident" may be broader than I realized. Explains why the man unsettled me.

When I tripped, I didn't die from the fall.

I died because I fell head-first into the living room and saw the bodies.

Yeah in their occupations they’re useful but not enough that money isn’t worth the trade . That’s why harden was the most expensive. Because it was bought from a blacksmith . A person who that ability is extremely useful . The amount of money was because it would slow down his work . But they sold it because they still could do the work .