Recent comments in /f/WritingPrompts
ChloeWrites t1_j7s1vea wrote
Reply to comment by Timeless_Timber in [WP]The young teen hero has called you, one of the oldest villains crying, apparently from what you could hear, their parents killed their dog from not doing a chore and kicked them out since they are gay, and then they ask if they could live with you by zWol42
Thanks!!!
Tomorrow_Is_Today1 t1_j7s1jkm wrote
Reply to [WP]The young teen hero has called you, one of the oldest villains crying, apparently from what you could hear, their parents killed their dog from not doing a chore and kicked them out since they are gay, and then they ask if they could live with you by zWol42
When he called the Crimson Tide, he didn't know if there would be a response. It was late at night, not that that mattered much to villains and heroes. If they were lucky, it might mean no spectators.
As he wiped blood and tears from his cheek and donned his elegant mask, the young Tiger made a silent wish for luck that night. Somehow the scales had to balance. He'd fought too hard to give in softly.
"Meet me in the grove of ghosts, at the boulder that reflects the light of the moon. This all ends here."
That was all he'd said in the call. Now he prowled between trees barely visible against the night sky, face quivering and thoughts dangerously silent. This all ends.
The details of their battle mattered little, for the location and time ensured no spectators. The Crimson Tide waited for him, as she always did. He had never fought a battle alone, and quickly found himself in the air and trapped within the long ribbons of her cloak, slowly tightening around his neck. He could still speak, if he wanted to. He said nothing.
"Someone hurt youuu," the Crimson Tide echoed.
"If you're going to kill me just do it."
Her face was hidden, but she drew closer. "No."
A tear squirmed its way down his cheek, squirming hopelessly as the ribbons bit into his skin.
Then she let go, and he dropped to the ground. He became aware of her figure towering over him, crimson cloak shining softly in the moonlight.
"Hurt them back." She extended a hand - a real, human hand, coated in glove but no cloth tendrils. "Join us."
The Tiger looked up. He took the hand.
Timeless_Timber t1_j7ruhow wrote
Reply to comment by ChloeWrites in [WP]The young teen hero has called you, one of the oldest villains crying, apparently from what you could hear, their parents killed their dog from not doing a chore and kicked them out since they are gay, and then they ask if they could live with you by zWol42
Nicenicenicenicenicenicenice
Timeless_Timber t1_j7ru4wc wrote
Reply to comment by ChloeWrites in [WP]The young teen hero has called you, one of the oldest villains crying, apparently from what you could hear, their parents killed their dog from not doing a chore and kicked them out since they are gay, and then they ask if they could live with you by zWol42
POG
ChloeWrites t1_j7rtwmj wrote
Reply to comment by Jacky1111111 in [WP]The young teen hero has called you, one of the oldest villains crying, apparently from what you could hear, their parents killed their dog from not doing a chore and kicked them out since they are gay, and then they ask if they could live with you by zWol42
Thank you!!!
Jacky1111111 t1_j7rqf9e wrote
Reply to comment by ChloeWrites in [WP]The young teen hero has called you, one of the oldest villains crying, apparently from what you could hear, their parents killed their dog from not doing a chore and kicked them out since they are gay, and then they ask if they could live with you by zWol42
Holy shit dude that is amazing
ChloeWrites t1_j7rlfkb wrote
Reply to comment by Timeless_Timber in [WP]The young teen hero has called you, one of the oldest villains crying, apparently from what you could hear, their parents killed their dog from not doing a chore and kicked them out since they are gay, and then they ask if they could live with you by zWol42
Part 3 is up
ChloeWrites t1_j7rlcih wrote
Reply to comment by ChloeWrites in [WP]The young teen hero has called you, one of the oldest villains crying, apparently from what you could hear, their parents killed their dog from not doing a chore and kicked them out since they are gay, and then they ask if they could live with you by zWol42
Part 3 - Fear of the Dark
I spoke to them telepathically as I had no distinguishable features aside from a humanoid appearance. "You will go to the hospital where your daughter rests, no thanks to you!" I floated towards them. "You will admit to what you have done and sign away your parental rights, so help me I'll melt the skin off your bones!"
I had hoped fear would be enough. After all, I am the primordial goddess of the stars.
"Y-you can't d-d-do that! That's illegal!" Mister McKinley was shaking where he stood. "You'd go to p-p-prison for life!"
"Foolish, selfish mortal! Your feeble laws have no hold on me! Now, go to the hospital at once..."
Missus McKinley ran inside and returned moments later with a... Fire extinguisher.
"Take this you wench!" She aimed the nozzle at me and pulled the trigger, spraying me with what I thought was a standard extinguisher. I was wrong as my body started to freeze over. "You don't scare us, fire lady!!! Now you'll freeze to death!!!"
I laughed to myself and played along with their game. "Noooooo! You've beaten me!!!!" I fell silent to them while giggling to myself. Though I must admit, this was almost as uncomfortable as Alexandria's home on the planet Void. She was born amongst the shadows of the universe, a primordial being like myself. But that's a story for another time.
Alexandria appeared in her primordial form, wrapping us all in darkness, pulling us into the vast nothingness of her homeworld. "How dare your strike down my wife! Now you'll suffer in the nothingness of my homeworld!"
"Remember, love. We still need them alive. Humans don't last long in your world." I slowly began to thaw out, bringing some light to the space around us, but not much.
"W-why are you doing this to us?! We are good people! We pay our taxes and bills!" The McKinleys shouted in unison.
"And what of your daughter? Does she deserve the near-death experience you provided her with tonight or the vile plans you have if she makes it out alive?!" You could feel the planet shake as Alexandria spoke.
"Yes! This is America! Land of the free, as in free from anyone that isn't like us!" Mister Mckinley shouted into the darkness. "It's so... Cold! I can't feel my legs!"
I had finally thawed out, and floated over to them. "You two don't deserve your daughter, let alone live..." I placed a palm on both of their faces and started to turn up the heat, slowly burning their faces, starting out like a mild sunburn as it grew worse the longer I held my hands in place.
"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaah!!!!!!" They both screamed, as if anyone would hear them.
Alexandria returned us to their doorstep. "You don't have long before your faces melt. What is your decision?!" I pulled my hands away, leaving first-degree burns on both of them.
"Okay! Okay!" Mister McKinley was crying, both from the pain of his burn, and his tears running down his face. "W-We will do it! Just leave us alone!!!"
They both ran inside, crying as they went to tend to their wounds.
Alexandria and I changed back to our human forms, got in the car, and made our way back to the hospital.
End of part 3
jardanovic t1_j7rkxg0 wrote
Reply to comment by Objective-Ice8233 in [WP]The young teen hero has called you, one of the oldest villains crying, apparently from what you could hear, their parents killed their dog from not doing a chore and kicked them out since they are gay, and then they ask if they could live with you by zWol42
The kind that makes him look like 2D from Gorillaz got dunked in bleach
Objective-Ice8233 t1_j7rk840 wrote
Reply to comment by jardanovic in [WP]The young teen hero has called you, one of the oldest villains crying, apparently from what you could hear, their parents killed their dog from not doing a chore and kicked them out since they are gay, and then they ask if they could live with you by zWol42
117 and still looks like a man in his late 30s? jesus what kinda immortality has this man got?
[deleted] t1_j7rhlb8 wrote
Timeless_Timber t1_j7rg60k wrote
Reply to comment by ChloeWrites in [WP]The young teen hero has called you, one of the oldest villains crying, apparently from what you could hear, their parents killed their dog from not doing a chore and kicked them out since they are gay, and then they ask if they could live with you by zWol42
I love it all and I will wait in anticipation for the next part!
ChloeWrites t1_j7rf75t wrote
Reply to comment by Timeless_Timber in [WP]The young teen hero has called you, one of the oldest villains crying, apparently from what you could hear, their parents killed their dog from not doing a chore and kicked them out since they are gay, and then they ask if they could live with you by zWol42
Happily. Just mapping out where I want it to go from here :) Gotta keep it consistent, ya know? Do you have any feedback or criticism?
katpoker666 OP t1_j7rdmp6 wrote
Reply to comment by AslandusTheLaster in [OT] Wonderful Wednesday, WP Advice: Writing Unrequited Love by katpoker666
Wow Astandus—thanks so much for such a detailed and well thought out response! You’re definitely right that unrequited love is often done poorly and that it can blur the plot of a writer is not careful
ChloeWrites t1_j7rd0sb wrote
Reply to comment by Fancy-Information757 in [WP]The young teen hero has called you, one of the oldest villains crying, apparently from what you could hear, their parents killed their dog from not doing a chore and kicked them out since they are gay, and then they ask if they could live with you by zWol42
Posted :)
[deleted] t1_j7rchfh wrote
AslandusTheLaster t1_j7rbvtp wrote
One problem I see on occasion from works including unrequited love is a failure to really keep the plot from melting together, so a relationship that's meant to to come about later and is currently unrequited (or may not even be intended to reach fruition in any meaningful way) is still treated as being canon for all intents and purposes. Sometimes it's in the form of the story treating it as a betrayal if one of the non-partners hangs out with someone else, other times it's just a general way of portraying the relationship that makes it feel like they're supposed to be a couple even if they're not actually one. It's one thing if the characters feel a certain way, and relationships come in many forms, but it can be a real issue when a relationship comes across as unhealthy and the author seems to be tipping the scales.
Of note, the core weirdness isn't necessarily romance related or even intrinsically bad. The fact that some beats are effectively foregone conclusions is usually a fairly banal writing trope, Plot Armor and the Unspoken Plan Guarantee are tropes that have basically become part of the common lexicon by now. It's when it starts to monkey up the timeline of the story that it becomes a problem, when the story starts acting like characters already know things or have already done things that haven't happened yet. When romance is involved, it also carries some rather Unfortunate Implications by reinforcing a cultural problem of people feeling like they have some sort of claim on others because they're attracted to them, even if the other person never agreed to any sort of relationship or even fully rejected them...
All that's certainly not to say unrequited love is a bad plot beat, but that this is one trap to watch out for when trying to write it, especially given how heated people can get about romance.
Timeless_Timber t1_j7rbmof wrote
Reply to comment by ChloeWrites in [WP]The young teen hero has called you, one of the oldest villains crying, apparently from what you could hear, their parents killed their dog from not doing a chore and kicked them out since they are gay, and then they ask if they could live with you by zWol42
Mooooaaaaarrrr plleeaaassseee
Ryter99 t1_j7ra5zn wrote
Reply to comment by FyeNite in [TT] Theme Thursday - Earnest by AliciaWrites
Gonna try to fix up or improve a couple of the bits you mentioned. Thanks for the quality feedback, Fye.
ChloeWrites t1_j7r80bc wrote
Reply to comment by ChloeWrites in [WP]The young teen hero has called you, one of the oldest villains crying, apparently from what you could hear, their parents killed their dog from not doing a chore and kicked them out since they are gay, and then they ask if they could live with you by zWol42
Part 2 - Wrath of A Thousand Suns
Alexandria and I called Phoebe and informed her of what was going on while waiting for the doctors to get back to us.
"Sorry that we left on such short notice, love." I sighed heavily as the stress weighed on my shoulders.
"I forgive you, darling. Besides, it is understandable considering the circumstances." Phoebe is a very patient young woman. A wonderful, kind soul. "So, Rin, is there anything I can do? Need me to visit the parents to collect her things?"
"No, no. I'd like to handle this personally. Just hold down the fort for us. We won't be able to get much info from the doctors since we have no legal ties to Kelly." I rolled my shoulders as Alexandria massaged them. "We will see you once we are home."
"Okay. I'll make sure Jack is fed and has water. Love you, see you when you get home!" Phoebe ended the call, a smile crept on my face. I'm lucky to have the two of them.
"Doctor Melancholy..." One of the physicians walked up to me, Doctor Collins. "We've managed to stabilize her, but she's very weak. Do you have any means to get ahold of her parents?"
"Not without visiting the household. Doctor Collins... They're the ones that did this to her. It's our job as doctors to help our patients, but... Moments like these... Some people don't deserve our help... Sometimes, I wish we could just let them... Perish." I clenched my fists as I looked him in the eye.
"Trust me. I know what you mean, but we took the hippocratic oath. We have to do everything we can to save our patients, no matter whether they are 'good', or 'bad', or fall somewhere outside or inside of that spectrum. Just, if you could bring the parents here, somehow, that would be helpful. Even if they caused it." Doctor Collins turned and walked away.
"Alexandria, let's go collect them." I stood up, holding my hand out for her.
Alexandria took my hand and pulled me into a tight embrace, giving me a peck on the lips. "Yes, let's." I grinned as I saw the sinister look in her eyes.
We got into the car and plugged Kelly's address into the GPS, thanks to Kelly's driver's license.
We reached the house, but parked a few blocks away and got out of the car, and made our way to the McKinley's.
I knocked on the door three times. "Hello, Doctor Melancholy, house visit for Mister and Missus McKinley."
Alexandria put her right hand on my left shoulder before giving me a big smile and mouthed, "We got this."
The door opened and two people in their late 30s opened the door. "A house call, THIS late at night?! Who the hell do you think you are, we didn't call nobody!!!"
"You did not. Your daughter did..." I saw passed the parents and gasped at what remained of the dog. I tried to gather my composure.
Missus McKinley stepped in front of me, blocking my view of the dog. "It was a tragic accident, poor thing. Now, what was you sayin' about our trashy daughta? That sleazy... L-lesb... Ugh! It's so disgusting! Love should only be reserved for two things: Family and straight couples! The gays are constantly trying to tread on our way of life! I won't take it from anyone! Not even my daughta!"
More than just my blood was boiling at this point. "You... You two don't care for Kelly... Have you thought about signing away your rights as parents and giving her to a relative instead?"
"Ha! What relatives? None of 'em bums live in the country! Sides, we just need to send 'er off to one of those conversion camps and they will make our daughta normal again!" Mister McKinley roared with laughter.
"Sign your parental rights over to wife and I. We will take legal custody of Kelly. We can start the process first thing tomorrow." I did my damndest to not lose my cool, but I could feel myself slipping. "It is the least you can do. You don't send LGBT+ kids to conversion camps! Not being cisgender or straight isn't the problem! It's people. Like. You!"
I watched as their mouths fell open, then anger spread across their faces. "How DARE yous come over to our house and tell US how to raise OUR kid! You're justas much a part of the problem and shoulda done been converted! You make me sick! Besides, she turns 17 at midnight! When she's 18, she can do whatever the hell she wants, but until then, she is OUR child and WE control her!" Mister McKinley slammed the door in my face.
I couldn't take it anymore. I had hoped to keep Supernova under wraps, only bringing out my powers sparingly. This was an emergency.
My body began to change it's chemical composite as I slowly became a walking star. Alexandria stepped forward and knocked on the door once more before becoming one with the shadows.
The parents opened the door. "We already told yas... N-no..." Mister McKinley wet himself where he stood, only for my radiating heat to dry him. "And whose d-d-do you t-t-think you are?!"
End part 2
fanonimus99 t1_j7r6h3l wrote
Reply to [WP]The young teen hero has called you, one of the oldest villains crying, apparently from what you could hear, their parents killed their dog from not doing a chore and kicked them out since they are gay, and then they ask if they could live with you by zWol42
Aphrodite wasn't always a vigilante, following Hephaistos' every step, always ready to get them out from the cliches of heroes.
They were a hero once, two years prior. His mentor was Hypnos, and man, they were gratefull gor the snovett hero. Hypnos was kind and understanding, helping them with everything he could. He was the first one they came out to, and he was always so supportive! But the agency had him under an iron grip, the number one and two heroes, Hellas and Nyx, his supposed best friends made him do bad things with his pover. Make villains defendless, absolutely at the agency's mercy. If they had known what Aphrodite's real pover was, they would have kept him under their mindful wach, too.
But Hypnos made everyone believe that they could only teleport short distances, with no one but themselves.
Aphrodite loved Hypnos like a father figure, but he couldn't go to him on that fateful night. It was raining, and he was standing in the middle of the street with a luggage, containing every one of their possesions.
It was a favour they called in, one gained by saving Zephyrus, a villain, from falling debrees, given to them by no other than prometheus himself.
Aphrodite's name wasn't always Aphrodite either. The name was given by Prometheus, who accepted them into his home, like they were his own child.
Aphrodite long forgot their old name or their parents. They, however, call Prometheus dad behind closed doors, and Hypnos pops. They try to get the two to go on a date to stop the embarrassing and cringy flirting while the two fought.
It never worked so far, but they, their boyfriend Hephaistos, and that other annoying vigilante who is involved for some reason will never give up.
FyeNite t1_j7r4zz2 wrote
Reply to comment by wordsonthewind in [TT] Theme Thursday - Earnest by AliciaWrites
words words!
> My favorite creation of hers was something she called Liar's Pie.
Mmm, sounds delicious already for some reason...
> "But Mom," I said very reasonably, "why would you bake this pie for me? I never lie to you."
This kid's reasoning skills are on point, love this guy.
> The words simmered at the tip of my tongue, a million little stories and excuses waiting to be unleashed. Details jumped out at me: I saw my classmates' moods and secrets as clearly as their uniforms or the color of their hair.
I loved this bit, it flowed so well. You did a wonderful job of capturing both the meaning and magic of this pie in this singular passage.
I do just have a few bits and bobs for you though,
> She used to say that she'd seriously considered being a baker, but getting the fresh-baked treats and pastries out in time for ravenous customers to purchase their breakfast meant having to get up in the middle of the night. And she simply wasn't a morning person. Besides, she loved to tinker and come up with new recipes rather than make things in batches.
This bit read a bit odd to me. They're just excuses and reasons for why she didn't become a baker. It's worded well, but detracts quite a bit from the story, and right at the start of the story too. I'd say clip it down some.
Maybe removing the "morning person" bit could help? The bit about how she likes experimenting rather than baking batches adds to the creative magic that this story seems to have, so it fits the theme.
> "Why is it called that?" Dad wanted to know.
Considering that we never get to see the dad's reaction or experience with the pie in the story, leaving him out of this bit and the story as a whole could save you a few words and give you one less character. But up to you really. This could just be a preference thing.
I hope this helps.
Good Words!
ProbablyCranky t1_j7r46k2 wrote
Reply to comment by AutoModerator in [WP]The young teen hero has called you, one of the oldest villains crying, apparently from what you could hear, their parents killed their dog from not doing a chore and kicked them out since they are gay, and then they ask if they could live with you by zWol42
And also you're secretly a shrimp. And also you have a pet pebble named Sam. And also the number 3 doesn't exist. And also...
TheFloridaManYT t1_j7r3ln6 wrote
Reply to comment by AutoModerator in [WP]The young teen hero has called you, one of the oldest villains crying, apparently from what you could hear, their parents killed their dog from not doing a chore and kicked them out since they are gay, and then they ask if they could live with you by zWol42
OP are you okay?
AutoModerator t1_j7s23st wrote
Reply to [WP] The first night of your 18th birthday, you wake up in the bed of someone attracted to you. It’s a well known phenomena, and the world has adjusted to it. You, however, have woken in a dark void. by P-o-t-a-t-o-o
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