We live to serve.

D'oh! I think I need a little of the lemonade myself. Thanks for the catch!

Fantastic, really good take on the prompt! This one is my favorite response.

Painful AND pretty - can't just have pain. Has took like it was birthed in hellfire too.

If I may, I have one remark . The paragraph in the middle where all the interesting action happen is too long ' it is block-ed up'' makes readding difficult. Anything else is neet!!

Nice work.

WOW!!! 😳😲😵

I am seriously blown up!! WHAAAAAAT?? I JUST WATCHED AN EPIC EPISODE OF SUPER-SPIES TRAINING SESSION IN A SUPER SCI-FI SERIES ( ALL THIS WHILE READING!!!)

HOLLY CRAP!! THIS IS GOLD!! YOU DESERVE AN AWARD: A 24 CARAT GOLD REVOLVER, WITH DESIGNED SILVER BULLETS. ( WOULD YOU ACCEPT THAT GIFT IF I HAD IT, OR WOULD YOU PREFER SOMETHING ELSE?)

Wasn't this the premise of the show "Forever"?

Man gets cursed 300 years ago so that he's resurrected every time he dies. As you can imagine, after 300 years of this, it gets old, so he's researching new and improved ways of killing himself off... by becoming a medical examiner in New York where he can study the many ways that people die.

The premise was great, and the acting was quite good, but sadly, it never made more than a single season.

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>“Uh, so Carl, you may not know it, but uh I’ve been working with orcas. [...]

Is this meant to say Tom, the visitor person?

Good story and atmosphere though!

It was strange, but it was here to fight a very different war than in the past. It had been a long time since a smaller country stood up to the aggression of a much bigger neighbor, much less with this amount of success. This was but one more step, and even relics were important.

I ran my hand along the metal flank, across the rubber wheels on the carriage. Imprinted on the side of the bore: "From death, life." So many people misunderstood. What made this a holy relic wasn't about religion. They all were just human interpretations of a broader concept anyway. I looked over at my team. A Christian, a Hindu, a Buddhist, a Muslim, an Atheist. All of them were here for the same core idea that was the source of their respective beliefs. The natural order of the universe was balance, healthy growth among mild chaos, a billion pendulums of life, force, energy, resources, all swinging gently around their center. Any that were pushed too far, held out of place too long, got more pressure to return to how it should be. The most severe imbalances would produce the greatest corrections. It was the universal mandate for balance. The judgement of against those who would defy it. The justice that required sacrifice to restore.

This was an old Soviet gun, repaired, repurposed, and maintained for this battle. It was a good gun. It would help push back the advance of the invaders. It would help keep safe my mother, my sister, my wife, and my son. It wasn't one of the incredible triple 7s but I was proud of it and of what my team could do with it.

I patted the barrel again as the ready signal came over the radio, and our signal officer began punching the coordinates into the targeting computer, then called out the angle, elevation, and charge. It was a fantastic piece of fire control technology. I grinned, remembering how most of the brightest of the old way were actually Ukrainian. The enemy couldn't win this. They didn't need to start it in the first place. But no way in hell we were going to back down.

I stepped back to the safe zone just as the order came: "Fire!"

The gun lept in recoil, throwing it's shell with greater precision than the original gun could ever have managed. To my left and right, came the rippling reports of twenty nine more guns firing as nearly simultaneously as reasonable came crashing on my ears.

The fight to retake Mariupol from the Russians had begun.

[removed]

A minor nitpick, but in case it saves any writers some effort looking it up, Apollo 17 was the last time a human landed on the moon, which took place in December 1972.

"So it's common for vampires to just send out mass invitations to parties?" I query as Grit, Terror and I are ushered into the largest, fanciest mansion I've ever seen.

"Yeah, kind of. Most of the time other vampires outside friends and family just hear about parties - everyone knows everyone type thing - and we tend to be quite welcoming so if you show up, you're allowed in."

"This is a bit different though" Terror remarks. "This time, every vampire really was invited, as a celebration of no longer having to live in the shadows of humanity. You made that happen, Gavin, so you were invited too."

I blush. "Just trying to make sure people know the truth... too bad Curd didn't want to come."

"Yeah, Scaria is too hyper for more 'formal' events and Curd isn't a fan of parties with no pranks involved" Gavin chuckles. "Course that means my mum has to stay at home."

"Oh, she doesn't mind" Terror smiles. "Pale just wants to look after her family!"

We enter and begin chatting away, enjoying the vibes and the music, when a female vampire around my age rushes up. "THERE YOU ARE! I was worried you didn't make it! I really wanted to meet you!"

Grit comes over. "Sorry, Scarlett, Gavin has a girlfriend."

Before I can process what just happened, Scarlett puts her hands on her hips. "Hey, sweetheart, this is between me and him!"

"Why'd you lie anyway?" I add.

Grit grabs my arm. "Because Scarlett is vicious! She doesn't care-"

"THIS again." Scarlett rolls her eyes. "Grit found out I had been biting and turning people who were criminals. I'm talking pedo's, murderers and grave robbers, as well as other 'unsavoury' types, and he thinks I'm horrible."

I cock an eyebrow in curiosity. "Every been tracked down by the Vampire Hunter's Guild?"

Her eyes light up. "This is EXACTLY what I was trying to tell Grit! They caught me as I was saving a young girl, questioned me, and let me go!"

Grit grunts. "They wouldn't."

"Actually" I chime in, "they would. I did a lot of research on them. They only kill vampires if they find there wasn't sufficient reason for turning people. In fact, the guild has an official position with the police so they can take care of VAMPIRE criminals, and the police AGREE that vampires can be released with a warning!"

"Yeah... I got a call to go back in, being told I can't do it anymore... and I've respected that decision." Scarlett grins.

Grit tuts and walks away. She kisses me. "Thanks for that, cutie!"

I blush again. "That's... no problem..."

"Can I be honest? I could NEVER express this before because of obvious reasons, but... I've always wanted to have a human for a partner..."

"And you want that human to be me?" I ask.

"Only if you're willing. I can give you a formula which will alter your biology and allow you to live forever!"

"Wouldn't I basically be a vampire?" I joke.

Scarlett laughs. "Oh, you're funny! No, you'd still be human. You wouldn't crave blood, and, more importantly..." she puts her chin onto my shoulder, breathing deeply. "I can still feed on you!"

I get nervous, but before I can say or do anything, there's a loud noise. Everyone turns to see a man in a black outfit, a sack slung over his shoulder. He looks around, expression slowly turning into fear. "CRAP!" He attempts to jump back out the window.

Terror has already grasped his jumper. He tears himself out of it and makes a run for the front door, realising there are vampires there, too. He sees another window and goes to break it.

Scarlett grabs his arm and shoves him back onto the floor. "PLEASE DON'T HURT ME!" he begs.

Scarlett bends down. "You have three choices, upgraded from two. Firstly, I can turn you, making you one of us and giving you immortality. Secondly, I can make you my new pet and I can provide you with all the comforts you can ask for. Thirdly, you can wait in this building for the police to show up and take you to prison, where you'll be back among humans. I'm NOT patient, and I'm hungry. Make your choice, or I'll just make it FOR you."

The man scrambles for his phone, quickly calling a number. "HELP! I'm being threatened by a vampire! Just come to-"

As the man makes a desperate plea for help, Grit comes up behind me. "Still think she's innocent?"

I look at the side of her head that's facing me. Her eyes are sparkling with determination, her gaze is firm and piercing, her mouth hungry and eager.

I look back at Grit. "She's just dealing with a criminal. She's not in the wrong here. Also... I like her fire and spark."

___________________________________________________________________________________________________

This story is a part of my series, My Roommate is a Vampire. Please check it out!

Love it!

My parents used to have a problem with rabbits eating all the bark off the lilac trees in their yard during the winter. They forgot to put burlap around the trunks before the snow fell that year. So one winter they coated the bark with hot sauce to try and get the rabbits to leave the trees alone.

Doing so had no effect, and my dad swears it actually increased how much bark the rabbits ate off the trees. From that year onwards, they always made sure to put the burlap on early.

Spindrift

(I decided to do an alternate twist on the prompt, with different perspectives)

My roommate Tom is a pretty nice guy. Donates to charities, does community service with the local Boy Scout troop, that kind of thing.

There’s only one problem about him.

He’s in MY GODDAMN HOUSE.

After I died of “Acute asphyxiation of the larynx” (Clearly, the coroner was getting some use out of her Word-A-Day calendar) the HOA decided to ignore my will and sell my house. Tom bought it, despite my best efforts, and I’ve sort of gotten used to him. Of course, that doesn’t mean I stopped trying to get him the hell out of my house, like how his shower inexplicably turned cold, or when his Wi-Fi mysteriously went out during an important Zoom meeting.

Unfortunately for me, he was determined to stay. He wound up attempting an exorcism, but he botched it and wound up creating a supernatural contract with me that not only allows him to see me, but hear me as well. He started treating me like his personal therapist, whining and griping about all his woes. He never seemed to listen to me when I told him that my major was mechanical engineering, not psychology.

But I guess he finally did understand me, and that led to this: Me, in the house of the HOA president, stealing vital parts from her toaster oven, stand mixer, lawn mower, and anything else I could put my degree to good use on. By the time I was done, the generator in her backyard was useless, and the next time she tried to mow her lawn, she’d find that she could only mow in square patches, since her mower wouldn’t move when it was turned on. My work done, I returned to my house (It was still my house, even though Tom was technically the legal owner) and informed Tom that my sabotage work was done. Soon enough, the entire HOA began moving out due to technical difficulties with their homes. As they moved out, the issues they complained of seemed to fix themselves, as if by magic.

I get the feeling Tom might not be as bad of a guy as I thought.

The long game.

What’s that old saying? Something like “If you’ve already tasted the poison, you may as well take it all?”

Edit: If you’ve already eaten the poison, you may as well lick the spoon.

...mad enough to selectively breed and genetically modify them to be even more painful, because we just love the pain.

If that doesn't say something about us I don't know what does.

EDIT- Relevant comic.

(https://i.imgur.com/BkcjFoG.png)

I actually meant, with the way you wrote it, she sounds lie she is targeted a lot, and that makes me wonder what the reason is lol. But it's a really great piece! I like how the fight scene is described a lot.

"Wait, it what?"

That I had made an embarrassing mistake nearly went without saying. That the scientists washed their dishes with the lab equipment, this mistake couldn't go without saying, so I said it:

"I told you that your unsafe lab practices would be the death of me, Mike."

Mike and I had been good friends for ages, and I knew that he must feel horrible, so it was nice to be able to get him to chuckle, as teary-eyed as he was getting.

"You son of a bitch, you just had to get one more joke in, didn't you?" He let out an odd noise that sounded like a sigh trying to hold back a sob. "How do you feel, Bill? Is there any pain?"

"No," I lied. I was getting a splitting headache, and the ringing in my ears alone was almost painful. There was another feeling, an odd not-quite-lightheadedness, not-quite-dizziness that I couldn't quite put a finger on...it wasn't painful, but it felt like I was walking in a deep fog. Everything felt heavy. I needed a nap. But, in spite of everything, my curiosity, which was apparently enough to kill a whale, rather than a cat, compelled me to ask.

"So, how does this poison work, again?"

Maybe it would be good, for Mike, to focus on the science, for a moment, instead of his dying friend. If I could do that much, maybe it would be worth it.

He pinched the bridge of his nose between his forefinger and thumb. "So, we know that whales' brains sleep one half at a time, right? While we were researching cetacean intelligence, trying to unlock the potential of their brains, we discovered that this compound had the unfortunate side effect of synching up both halves of their brains. When exposed, they would fall asleep -- completely -- and drown. It only took one drop, no matter which species. It..."

I didn't hear the rest of his explanation, as everything faded away.

I woke up a short time later, on a stretcher in the back of an ambulance. It was a good thing that we were headed to the hospital, as I think I gave the poor paramedic a heart attack. I suppose I should be grateful he didn't try to bash my brains out.

Mike met us at the hospital, absolutely beside himself in relief. Neither of us were the hugging sort, but this felt like one of those situations where an exception could be made.

"I...I don't understand it. Don't take this the wrong way, Bill, but why are you alive?"

It was my turn to laugh. It felt great, and I felt more refreshed, more alive than I had in years. I supposed that dying might do that to a fellow, or maybe just the deepest, soundest sleep I had experienced in years. "I don't think that poison works the same way for humans, since both halves of our brains normally sleep at the same time. Though, I guess it is a good thing I wasn't in a pool."

[removed]

You took this in such a different direction than I would’ve guessed! Fun concept.