The painting in the movie is pretty cool too

This is going to be fun

I'm on number 5 through this book in the last year. It is my favorite book on influencing behavior. I was reading it on my way to apply for jobs and on my way back. I've read almost 100 books in the last year, many of them relating to this topic.

If you had read it, and had the capability to see things outside of black-and-white, all-or-nothing thinking(from: Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy"), you wouldn't tell someone else how to act based on someone else's brief, not-inclusive, subjective interpretation of what that book delivers.

Why not quote the book yourself?

Because I've read books on influence, I am using very specific words and phrasing to invoke your emotional response. But, what do I know, huh? I'm not using tactical empathy (Christopher Voss from "Never Split the Difference") nor am i going to use the skills covered in two books I have by Jim Camp. because I like a good fight. Reddit is full of defensive people also looking for a fight. So, bring it. Lol

Maybe you should check my comment history to see how I'm doing at applying some of these principles. People are complicated and flawed. But, you seem to be perfect, so I'd love for you to guide me through life. Getting defensive because I'm honoring the book based on my knowledge and experience is...? Sad. But, that's my faulty perspective, of course.

I just wanted to thank you for violating the rules of a book you've never read, by judging someone you don't know for not adhering to the principles therein 100% - on a reddit forum no less. If you studied neuroscience and psychology, you would know that the brain is elastic and it changes based on your experiences and what you read and do (see: "Rewire Your Anxious Brain" by Catherine Pittman PhD and Elizabeth Karle). So, the more work you put in to change, the more likely you are to change. I'm doing the work, are you? See also: books by Adam Grant, Malcolm Gladwell, Marcus Aurelius, Ryan Holiday, Benjamin Franklin, Abraham Lincoln, and more.

People who were abused aren't skilled at making friends and influencing people. I had to spend years learning. We are all on our own journey, eh?

And I am not here to sell anyone or tell others how to live. I'm here to speak to something i have in-depth knowledge of, and because you don't have it, you chose to get defensive rather than walk away from a conversation you don't belong in.

That's my career specialty - influencing people - not my hobby. Big difference. I hate sales, but it's what I've done well in a variety of settings and industries. Books like this are the reason for my success. Before them, I was not functional in a social environment. I still am not in many ways.

My above comment is for the people who attacked me and then deleted their comments. Oh, and those who downvoted me :)

I couldn’t get into it. So much pretentious long-winded dialogue. Like the author was trying to sound deep by having Henry have something philosophical to say about absolutely everything and basically have everyone around him slow clap every time when it really was just pompous drivel

This could also be an interesting point of comparison. If memory serves, quite a few of her contemporaries critiqued the book as anti-Christian.

Yes, they are awesome.

BTW, to get a perspective on AI taking over writing, see "The Great Automatic Grammatizator".

I have been dipping out of "chick lit" for years, and I like some, but most leave me cold. I did like Beach Read.

Thank you for your suggestions ❤️

1. How much better would most women’s lives be if this was a sustainable option?

2. When I was in my 30’s and there was a character on Mad Men named St John. I felt dumb as hell.

3. I ugly cry every time I read this part. Full on snotty nose running down my face, tears streaming from my eyes. I first read it when I was 14ish and it helped me understand there are different types of soulmates.

4. Grace Poole would only need 1 shot of whiskey because you know she wants to spill the beans and feel VERY important.

5. 100%. And I think we should use this as a measure of female independence and rebellion against the patriarchy from now on.

6. Not just the audacity. Where does he get the caucasity? And the answer is unqualified men have always been put in places of authority because other unqualified men are terrified of uteruses. Uteri? What’s the plural for uterus?

Yeah and their cute! 🐔🐤🐤

Well, the reality is that not all romance novels are the same. I used to read romance almost exclusively in my teens/very early 20s. I've tried rereading some of the books I liked back then and found them both boring and kind of 'meh' on writing. Romance is a very popular genre and that kind of means there's a lot of dreck, even among the "bestsellers."

I'd recommend playing around with the subgenres.

Urban fantasy with light romance: Kate Daniels series by Ilona Andrews
Sci-fi romance: Sirantha Jax series by Ann Aguirre

The last thriller romance I remember really liking was by Lauren Bach, but that was like over a decade ago and my tastes weren't always great back then. That said, Nora Roberts may be a good choice, given that she also writes a long-running mystery/thriller series as JD Robb.

Horror romance... Ehh, not really a subgenre. The closest you'll really find is horror elements in either urban fantasy, fantasy or sci-fi romance. Maybe thrillers, too, if you count serial killers as horror. But that first book in the above-mentioned Kate Daniels series might work as there are some dead folks and missing folks with something or someone supernaturally strong responsible.

Aside from all that, Lisa Kleypas is one of only a handful romance writers I can still enjoy. Straight romance though.

I think people use that term without actually knowing what it means. Elaborate.

I found it unrealistic. People who are as into hedonism as Dorian usually don't suddenly have this desire for moral reformation.

They just... die from the hedonism/old age while still being into hedonism.

They deserve a few wins after the horrendous things people do to them.

If it reminds you of women, that is something about you and something you need to examine about yourself. I'm also happy to tell you that most women don't think they 'lose it all' at 30. That's mostly incels who think that.

I also love recycling!

Which means that if you open up a thread about it on reddit, it should be assumed spoilers could be there.

Many romance books are pulpy and not high quality. The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society is an excellent romance.

I love this book. I like how it doesn't shy away from emphasizing how shitty Dorian and his philosophy are right to the end.

I even watched the movie too and it holds up well.

W book and author

too cynical for me

Love me some Tales of the Unexpected

You can’t get lost in Cape Town by Zoe Wicomb - 426 ratings. Mixed race young woman in Apartheid South Africa living as a white woman.

Dancing in the Dust by Kagiso Lesego Molope another South African book. This is a coming of age story of a girl growing up and being made to grow up be society. Was incredible. Needs to be more widely available!

You won't be disappointed!

Oh, just wait until you read 'The Swan' in that book ... Utterly magnificent. 'Henry Sugar' is also brilliant (Benedict Cumberbatch is perfect for the role) and 'The Mildenhall Treasure' blew me away too. 'The Hitchhiker' is just pure Dahl. It's a gorgeous collection.

His adult short stories are simply amazing. There's so much variety in them, often depending on which magazine they were being written for, but they are still so very, very well controlled. Just awesome. 'The Landlady', 'Beware of the Dog', 'The Man from the South', and 'Lamb to the Slaughter' plus the wonderful wrongness of the 'Uncle Oswald' stories ... Almost jealous of you having so many brilliant stories still to discover.

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