The Jefferson off Jefferson in Warwick

26, moved here across the country 2 years ago, didn't know a soul, peak covid, working remote. I still want to make more friends but I've made a lot of them since those lonely mid-quarantine days. Heres my 2 cents:

Lots of people are in the same boat. Which is encouragement, but it's also useful info. Look for places that will filter for people who are also looking to get into the community. Like if you tried to socialize with a random person on the street, they might be pretty full up, and not particularly interested in a friendship. But if you chatted someone up in (for example) a church event, the vibe is that they're likely to be very friendly and quick to make plans together. Look for community spaces like that; where there are hotbeds for social formation.

Find a reason to go to the same place over and over again. It takes months (or years) to get established, and accepting the fact that it will be gradual opens a lot of doors, compared to trying to force immediate connections. I know people here who used bumble bff to make meaningful connections, though imo it seems spotty. The strategy I've found, and continue to do, is to just see the same people in public over and over again until conversation sparks (which is in itself a skill that takes a lot of bravery/effort to enact). I've found out the relevant term for those public spaces is a "Third Place." Keep an eye out for places where people are naturally drawn there or doing an activity, and also sorta socialize and form a community as a biproduct. So gyms, parks, shared workspaces, art collectives (like The Steel Yard), some libraries and bars, etc. Find an excuse to go there regularly and then let yourself be social.

For me, the spaces I've had a lot of success with are 7 Stars, and hanging out at the dog park. Also prioritizing walking over driving makes you bump into a lot more people. And honestly even if talking with strangers at the park doesn't lead anywhere (which in my experience it does), it really makes the day better to just have brief, surface level positive interactions with people. Good luck, catch me on Broadway!

If you have some flexibility with your end-of-day working hours, make use of the 24hr unlimited pass!

(Ex: One night I'll take the 6:27pm from Back Bay, the next morning I'll take whatever, and that evening I'll take the 5:45pm, which is within 24hrs. You have to buy these unlimited passes in 5-packs, but it's ~$24 per pass and I get 3 rides out of it, so cheaper than the $12.50 x 3 = $37.50)

28F and host DnD and a book club. Send me a dm if you’re interested. 🙂

I recently moved down here from Boston as well a couple months ago and haven’t quite fully gotten out to meet people. My job is hybrid but can do most of it from home. I’m down to hang out and catch movies/try restaurants, etc. 35/m here

l RI GOURMET HEAVEN INC $352,228.16 they should open back up late night

I’ve donated my hair several times over the years. Any stylist should be able to do it as you are the client. They’ll put your hair in pigtails or braids and cut above the hair tie. I will say that I’ve had some stylists (in CA) give me a hard time about cutting my hair. It’s not really their place to say, so I didn’t use their services. My go to stylist is Jess at salon951 on Hope Street.

I recommend using Wigs for Kids. You do have to mail it in yourself, but they don’t charge folks for the wigs they make.

Any place should be able to do it (I’ve done it at 2 different ones in RI without letting them know in advance). One gave me the hair to take home and mail myself, the other offered to do the mailing themselves. I can’t remember exactly where I donated, I think once the Pantene group and the other wigs for kids.

I paid to get my hair cut but told her I was mailing it to Locks Of Love so she put it into pigtails and let me keep it

ill never see eye to eye with someone who only cares about cars and nothing else

I'll see you at the community meetings.

>No, when we build the accessible lane, you HAVE to use it. And since you drive, everyone else drives. eyeroll

No idea what you’re even responding to here. I think you misinterpreted what I was saying.

Anyway, kind of tired of dealing with your pompous know-it-all attitude and self righteous manner of conversing. We clearly don’t see eye to eye and likely never will.

Not sure of a salon, BUT. My wife donated a few years back, and did a ton of research. Apparently there’s some controversy about Locks for Love charging some people for wigs made from donated hair, while Panteen Beautiful Lengths or Wigs for Kids have no such baggage. In both cases, you should just need to dry cut your hair, bag it, and mail it in. Most salons should be able to accommodate!

The sunny place for shady people

> I will still need to drive when I go to work in the morning.

No, when we build the accessible lane, you HAVE to use it. And since you drive, everyone else drives. eyeroll

>You continue to ignore the fact that Hope St is in the middle of a residential area, not a city downtown.

Residential areas have the most activity when it comes to non-car usage.

>but people coming in from more than a mile or so away are going to drive.

Tell how building an accessible lane is stopping you from commuting a mile.

>And possibly waste twenty minutes driving in circles looking for a spot while polluting the environment.

City and local studies have shown there's an overabundance of parking already that is never filled to capacity. You'll park on the corner and walk 30 seconds, boohoo!

I literally was there last night and found parking directly in front. I was there a few days ago again and found similar parking. In my almost 20 years here, I have never had an issue parking, lmao

>And if you live 5+ miles away, you’re probably not considering biking to dinner to begin with.

Interesting how other cities and countries people do that just fine... something, something... infrastructure? Naw, can't be! Surely, people don't bike/scooter/walk/bus commute in the smallest state in the nation because they're just lazy, not because they don't feel safe and would likely die because we only cater to cars.

Get help, Vinny

>Wait, are you telling me Providence was built when cars were around or did we accommodate them over time while ignoring other modes of transit?

We’re not moving back to less efficient modes of transportation as out primary means of getting around. It’d be nice to have more options, but I will still need to drive when I go to work in the morning.

>We just started putting in this accessible infrastructure a few years ago. We're currently catching up to other cities. Your suggestion to continue to cater to only cars is kinda fucking stupid and goes against all science and basic reasoning.

You continue to ignore the fact that Hope St is in the middle of a residential area, not a city downtown. There are many locals like myself that can walk to anywhere on Hope St, but people coming in from more than a mile or so away are going to drive.

>Most are but again, not the point.

This is an assertion of yours without evidence. Perhaps this is why many of the business owners see it differently than you. Presumably if they thought this change would help business, they would all be fully supportive.

>oh no, they might need to walk 30 extra seconds!

And possibly waste twenty minutes driving in circles looking for a spot while polluting the environment.

>"Transportation is the largest source of greenhouse gas emissions in Rhode Island. Vehicles accounted for 35.5% of total greenhouse gas emissions in 2017." - RI DEM

My point was that if you live sufficiently close that you have the option of biking or walking, your drive would be so short that the impact on emissions would be negligible. And if you live 5+ miles away, you’re probably not considering biking to dinner to begin with.

> Our cities aren’t designed to get around solely by walking, biking, and relying on public transit.

Wait, are you telling me Providence was built when cars were around or did we accommodate them over time while ignoring other modes of transit?

We just started putting in this accessible infrastructure a few years ago. We're currently catching up to other cities. Your suggestion to continue to cater to only cars is kinda fucking stupid and goes against modern urban planning and basic reasoning.

>You can call me car obsessed all you want, but I don’t see any other way that I could practically survive while living on the East side.

Proved my point about the need for accessible infrastructure 👍

>Most people going out to dinner at Wara Wara are not biking there, with or without the bike trail.

Most are but again, not the point.

>but soon we will have a bunch of vocal people complaining about the lack of parking.

oh no, they might need to walk 30 extra seconds!

>Congrats! I’m sure your decision to bike 1 mile to Hope St instead of driving has really put a dent in global warming.

"Transportation is the largest source of greenhouse gas emissions in Rhode Island. Vehicles accounted for 35.5% of total greenhouse gas emissions in 2017." - RI DEM

>What are you... you're literally playing the typical republican, car obsessed American here.

Our cities aren’t designed to get around solely by walking, biking, and relying on public transit. You can call me car obsessed all you want, but I don’t see any other way that I could practically survive while living on the East side.

>Most people own bikes and have families, and they want the Hope St. bike trail according to surveys, again, primarily for safety reasons as stated in the community meetings.'

Most people going out to dinner at Wara Wara are not biking there, with or without the bike trail. I’m not doubting that a number of very vocal people want the bike trail, but soon we will have a bunch of vocal people complaining about the lack of parking.

>Huh...? Bro. I have a cheap bike I sometimes use to commute short distances like many others. I drive, I bus, I walk. The typical resident in the area likely doesn't even own a car as students may be the majority on the East Side, but that's not the point.

Congrats! I’m sure your decision to bike 1 mile to Hope St instead of driving has really put a dent in global warming.

You literally ignored all my points, again.

>This feels like I’m arguing with someone who makes AOC look like a tea party conservative.

What are you... you're literally playing the typical republican, car obsessed American here.

>It’s great that you bike everywhere and hang out with other like-minded cyclists, but that doesn’t mean you represent the standard resident or potential customer.

Most people own bikes and have families, and they want the Hope St. bike trail according to surveys, again, primarily for safety reasons as stated in the community meetings.

>The average person is not completing the Tour de France prior to sitting down for tapas and cocktails.

Huh...? Bro. I have a cheap bike I sometimes use to commute short distances like many others. I drive, I bus, I walk. The typical resident in the area likely doesn't even own a car as students may be the majority on the East Side, but that's not the point.

This feels like I’m arguing with someone who makes AOC look like a tea party conservative.

It’s great that you bike everywhere and hang out with other like-minded cyclists, but that doesn’t mean you represent the standard resident or potential customer. The average person is not completing the Tour de France prior to sitting down for tapas and cocktails.

Yeah! Like another comment highly underrated/unknown cocktail.

I was ready to give this a hard TF? but after reading the recipe it sounds wicked good.

> If you’re Wara Wara, KG Kitchen, or any other sit down restaurant on Hope St, your typical customer is not coming via bicycle.

A typical customer absolutely is... well, they won't be because Hope St. is literally a death trap. Very few I know in the cycling community go down Hope for that reason and people in the community meetings have said the same. You've surely been to them and heard this, right?

You've also yet to convince me that 1-2 parking spaces is worth the lives of non-car users, climate change, accessibility, losing business, that this infrastructure won't reduce car use and thus parking needs, etc. I've also provided you with details around local and urban planning studies but you simply dismiss it all. This feels like I'm arguing with those anti-vaxxers or evolution deniers again.

Hope St is not that crowded if you’re comparing it to any city area. If you’ve never ventured outside RI, take a trip to NYC or any major city and tell me how similar it is to Hope St.

If you’re Wara Wara, KG Kitchen, or any other sit down restaurant on Hope St, your typical customer is not coming via bicycle.

A large amount of them will be resolved in bankrubcy. Most will not be paid.