Submitted by throwRAthrow333999 t3_11b3hao in relationship_advice
Have to use a throwaway account because my fiancé often goes on reddit and will check my main account.
My fiancé (I'll call him C) has been acting much different since we've been engaged (we've lived together for 2 years and been engaged for 4 months) and I'm really worried now. C used to always encourage me to go work out, go shopping, and try to find hobbies to fill my time (we live in a small town). This changed almost the exact day we got engaged. He no longer wanted me to work out, go grocery shopping (or anywhere) without him, and on the days that I worked he wanted to drop me off and pick me up instead of me just driving myself (we only have one car). At first, I thought that he was just anxious about officially being engaged and feeling pressure from his family about a wedding but it's only gotten worse. At the end of December we had a big fight about him being controlling, and he insisted he wasn't being controlling he just wanted to protect me. I told him that the man I agreed to marry was not the same person I was talking to and he stormed out.
After that fight, things seemed to get slightly better for a bit, however about 3-4 weeks after the fight I found out I was pregnant. I was overjoyed that I would be having a baby, even though we had decided we would not have children until we got married. C was also very happy, but he continually referred to our baby as "his baby" or "his child" which made me upset. C said he didn't mean it was only his baby, but he has never corrected himself over the past month or so since I found out I was pregnant. I have stopped working since being pregnant because C is friends with the owner of the store I work at and C told him he doesn't want me working around "toxic fumes" while I'm pregnant with "his child" (I work at an art and pottery store). The owner agreed so I am now completely stuck at home all day.
Because C makes way more than I do and pays for almost everything, I would have all my paychecks deposited into our joint savings account that we agreed to keep for emergencies or if we want to make a big purchase. However, yesterday I happened to check our account and found it completely drained. I asked him about it and he said that he put it in his personal account because he paid for everything so I didn't need access to it anyway. I didn't make a ton of money at the place I worked at but there was probably about two years of living expenses in there (less with a baby).
Does anyone have any advice on talking to C about his new habits and attitude? Leaving him isn't really an option and I don't want to go through the rest of my life like this.
TLDR; Fiancé (C) has become much more controlling over my life socially and financially and I'm afraid I won't be able to change the way he's acting before our baby is born.