Submitted by ThrowRAginghoul t3_11g7336 in relationship_advice
Huge TL;DR because this is too long:
One of my "best friends" treats my boyfriend like he's her boyfriend, but I'm not sure if I'm thinking too much into it because it might just be her personality.
Long explanation:
She and I have been friends since middle school, I've been with my bf for a year.
She's known to be air-headed and overly affectionate, has a lot of male friends she is affectionate with and, at first impression, is really innocent, like a 9 year old girl in a woman's body.
She's one of my life-long best friends, or at least was.
As soon as my bf and I started dating she stopped talking to me and distanced herself a lot, while becoming one of my bf's best friends.
I was fine with it for months, until she started going to my bf's house at night, had him taking her places (they live close, it's easy for him to pick her up), and her just being incredibly intense with him. It bothered me a little but I let it happen, my bf often picks up his girl friends when they don't have a car, it didn't seem that unusual. The "dropping by his house without telling him" part is a thing she does a lot with other friends, it can be explained.
Then at my bf's graduation party he put his family, his male best friends and me on his table. She was furious when she found out and sent him a whole paragraph stating how hurt she was she wasn't in his table (keep in mind she was still invited) and that she'd been with him through thick and thin, and that she has always been so fond of him and she couldn't believe he didn't value her as much as she did. Then got mad and stopped talking to him when he tried to explain that I, his gf, was the only non-family woman on the table. She didn't go to the event.
This was really weird for me and my bf alike, but we know she has a history of being dramatic.
Then she lost me.
After graduation, a lot of schools in my city travel together to Cancun. Their schools went together.
One night she got drunk and started crying to him that no one likes her and no guy has ever treated her right. Then she had a fight with all her girl friends and cried in her room. She started telling the girls that were with her to call my bf because he was her only "true friend" and the only person that could make her feel better. Her friends called my bf telling him to please come, who refused but still went because he didn't want to seem like a bad person. A lot of things happened in that trip but this is the most relevant.
He admitted to me she was making him feel really uncomfortable, and told me he'd start distancing himself from her.
But she continueeddd.
My bf went to a gathering in her house, to which I couldn't go. When he was leaving he said bye to everyone normally but when he got to her she said
*"what is this??! aren't you going to hug me goodbye?? :(" *
and threw herself at him. He said she was hugging him for too long to the point where he stopped hugging her back and she was still hugging him. When she finally let go she kept her arms on his shoulders, looked up at him and whimpered-- LIKE A DOG.
Next morning she told him she was going to his house. He said no way, he had just woken up. She said she was already going so he lied and said he was somewhere else. She CALLED HIS SISTER asking if this was true. She lied as well.
I talked to her about it. She said she never thought it would bother me because "we are best friends" and "we should trust each other", and she'd never be attracted to him "in that way". She also said she's so affectionate with my bf because he reminds her of her older brother who isn't with her much.
To which, one, we're not best friends if you haven't talked to me since I got with him and two, my bf is not your brother.
And it's weird too because she's only overly affectionate when I'm not there. She makes sure to stay away when I'm with him.
But again, she's known for being the way she is. I'm not sure of her intentions.
Edit: I made a post about my friend, read it if you want to understand her more deeply.