Submitted by Informal_Ad2805 t3_11jl5jr in relationship_advice
Is My Daughter a Psychopath? She is Severely lacking of Empathy
My (56F) daughter (31F) have been strange for years. Since she married her husband, she stopped helping us financially. We were very poor when she grew up and we notice she never cried or showed emotion. I worked abroad when she was 6yr, and her father was ill with Parkinson’s. He passed away when she was 10. Then she lived with my sister after her dad died. There are many things she wanted to change and a lot of stuff she hated. First, she wants to change her name. She hated her first name as she has similar name with her stepsister, my late husband children from his first marriage. Then she completely blocked me of everything. Her husband is no better, he doesn’t answer my call as well. They have a daughter, they wouldn’t let me talk my grandchild. My daughter said she only recognizes her aunt as her mom and not me. I worked as a nanny to two children abroad just so I can feed and clothed both her and her brother but even she hated that. She’s also mad that I have pictures of kids I took care off and she hated that I asked her to call me aunt when I was working since I didn’t want my employer to know I have children. My employer wanted to employ a single woman with no kids. I had to do what I had to do at that time.
My daughter drastically change when she married her American husband. Is there anyway I can fix it with her? I don’t know what to do and I’m at my wits ends.
Edit: I’m asking if trauma from childhood could be the reason for my daughter having no empathy? Maybe if she talks to me, we can both work on getting her a therapy.
We were very poor when my husband fell ill with Parkinson’s. He lost his job. I had to work abroad to afford a good life for them. My daughter was 6 at that time. My late husband was strange from his family. When he left his first wife, his entire family went against him.
We had to name my daughter and my son the same name as her step siblings as we didn’t want them to find out our relationship. This has cause my daughter to be angry.
I’m asking if she has something wrong with her as many people are saying that she has trauma from her childhood. She has to take care of her dying father until he died. Then my sister took over. I sent them financial help and seen them every two years. This is normal in my culture.
I love my daughter. Just need an advice and I appreciate those who will give real advice.
Edit: people are wandering why my daughter worked to stacked shelves at 6. I did not know she has to do this. She told me when we last talked all her problems with me and one of them was that she has to work. I didn’t want her to work at that age. Please also understand that in the province in our country, some kids work to help their parents. Some kids work in the farm or transporting supplies. This is common and normal. My daughter didn’t think it’s normal after marrying an American. I can see why she would change. It’s a very different culture.
I could have leave her to her grandmother after her father died because his family want to keep her to be their all around care taker, but instead, I took her right away and had my Sister and my mom take care of her.
I was OFW abroad in Bahrain. I’m from the Philippines.
I also understand now why posters are angry if you’re not familiar with our culture, I can see where confusions maybe coming from. Most of us OFW workers have to leave our children to family, we have no choice. This isn’t something that many people in other countries are afforded a choice to take their kids with them.