Submitted by [deleted] t3_11nzt7q in relationship_advice
I posted this on r/relationships and it got toxic because of the fact that people misunderstood what I was saying. Instead they used it as an excuse to trash me
Points of clarification they never had sex, if they did I would not have pursued it. I know this because both my sister and him told me. That is not in my character at all. They were NOT together & had every right to date other people.
Lastly this post isn’t so we can debate whether I’m a bad person. Keep that to yourself, it’s to get advise on how to approach my sister.
TL:DR my sister and I had a crush on the same guy and now she won’t talk to me and it’s impacting my potential relationship
So long story short my sister started talking to this one guy who is fine asf. They went on a couple dates and one time he came to pick her up and I spoke to him because she was taking all day. I gave him my number just in case he needed to reach out to me in an emergency.
We were texting for a bit and just hit it off. He’s extremely mature for his age, he’s in the air force , and said he eventually wants to become a Physician assistant and have the air force pay for it. He’s going to apply to some programs they have in the air force after he gets his degree. I wanted to be a doctor but right now I’m a science teacher but I’m thinking of going to physician assistant school instead
Our messages became flirty and next thing you know we hooked up a couple times. After we started hooking up he stopped talking to my sister & once my sister found out she was pissed. He then cuts me off because he doesn’t want drama that my sister causing.
I had no idea my sister would freak out like that. He asked before we hooked up if he thinks my sister would mind because he’s still talking to her. I said she wouldn’t mind because y’all aren’t official yet and haven’t slept together yet. I wouldn’t have told them that if I thought it would be a problem.
I’m trying to pursue something with him but he want be in a relationship that causes family drama, so unless my sister is okay with he won’t consider anything more than a platonic friendship until my sister is cool with it. The problem is she has been ignoring me for 2 weeks