How do you know when it’s time to give up on a relationship?

Submitted by tagggirl80 t3_yiogri in relationship_advice

I want to start this by saying I absolutely love and adore my partner. Recently though I feel like we’ve been thrown a hell of a lot to deal with and it’s made us not as close as before. We have good moments but it’s like we don’t talk as much anymore. He started a medication to help his anxiety and OCD (I encouraged him to try it) and he had side effects which made him feel sick which in return made him super irritated with me. Im really sensitive and i’m trying to stick through it. I am constantly trying to be there and I do his chores for him and I buy him little gifts every once in awhile. He really doesn’t ever want to go out to do anything together anymore which means we don’t really spend quality time together which is one of our main love languages. I feel like I try and try and nothing ever works or makes him feel better. I feel unloved and like i’m a burden to him but im also just exhausted mentally and physically from trying so hard. I’ve cried to him and shared my feelings and it seems like he just mentally and physically cannot change because he’s dealing with his own stuff. I can’t imagine my life without him but it’s so hard to be so in love with someone when they don’t give much and are always irritated with you. I know he loves me a ton but I long for the beginning of our relationship. Any tips? How do you know when it’s time? I can’t even believe I’m writing this honestly

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mbashs t1_iujq76v wrote

When it’s only you trying to make it work with no effort from the other side, it’s time to move on.

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poseidons1813 t1_iujtkv6 wrote

When neither of you feel that same love but also they arent willing to work on it with, if your the only one trying then it is over. Just lost a 3.5 year relationship with the woman i thought i would marry. If they do not want to work on it after you brought up how your feeling it is very over.

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tagggirl80 OP t1_iujtt8o wrote

I don’t think I will recover if we break up. I cannot imagine a life without him

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poseidons1813 t1_iuk9e7t wrote

Trust me i felt the exact same way about my partner when she ended things. But you have to respect yourself and from what you described you deserve better and are putting in more effort than him

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tagggirl80 OP t1_iujn6ri wrote

Also to note, we rarely have sex anymore and we both work full time and we are broke so it’s hard to go do anything anyways. I just feel so at a loss on what to do. I’m clueless and stuck and confused and sad and mad.

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