I am In love with my ex.

Submitted by ImportantKick2956 t3_z8yjzk in relationship_advice

I am love my ex. We have split up. He is still giving me mixed signals, we talk everyday, meet up, have sex… etc. I cry every time I leave him, cry every night, and have constant anxiety about what the outcome is going to be. I don’t want to show that I am upset, as I’m scared I will push him away. I just dk what to do. I love him, I think I should put a brave face on and have a private cry when I am alone. I would take any time I could get with him, he was my full world, and he still is.

I want to maximise our chances of getting back together, but I’m just so scared of loosing him. I honestly care more about him than I care about myself. I believe he is my soulmate. He tells me he still loves me and it’s him that keeps the convos going etc. Which are all good signs, but I have been burned to many times before, I’m so terrified of being hurt. I’m the type of person that needs security, and this situation of us being ‘broken up’ but agreeing we don’t want to be with, talk to, or sleep with anyone else, telling each other we are in love with one another and meeting up is confusing to me.

I’m scared to talk to him about it because I don’t want to push him away. I’m so heart broken and filled with anxiety about what is going to come of us.

For context we have not been broken up for long.

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NotSoSaintly13 t1_iydz6la wrote

Why did you split up? That's important context that's missing here.

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ImportantKick2956 OP t1_iydznve wrote

Replying to NotSoSaintly13 (#817,754)

We agreed for the minute for both our mental healths we needed to split up (I really didn’t want to but I do agree with what he had to say). I’m not ok at the minute and I was receiving treatment but I stopped and have fell into a dark place, he was worried I wasn’t going to get help if we stayed together. It wasn’t a matter of falling out of love etc. He was caught adding an ex on a messaging app (she reached out to me), and that sparked all this conversation.

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NotSoSaintly13 t1_iye0fvh wrote

Replying to ImportantKick2956 (#817,896)

It sounds to me like he was trying to do some shady shit on the side with an ex and got caught, and his reaction to being caught was to turn it around and break up with you... And now he's still getting all the benefits of being in a relationship with you (love, chat, care, sex, etc) but he's not formally in a relationship with you, so he could still be fucking around on the side. This is just my perspective on the situation based on the info you've shared.

It sounds like this is having a big negative impact on you. If you broke up to focus on your mental health, I think you should really do that. Stop having contact with him for now and focus on getting the care and support you need to feel ok again.

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