Submitted by uwuJiblo t3_zjshvx in relationship_advice
Not a native speaker, forgive my mistakes.
So I’m in a bit of a poop hole right now. Yesterday I sent my GF of almost 2 years a screenshot of something funny happening on twitter, which revealed my username to her (she knew I use twitter but never did she follow me there or anything cause she doesn’t like this website)
Few minutes pass, and I then receive a « montage » of a few lingerie pictures I liked on the website over the course of few months, 5 photos or so over 2 years. She had been looking at every liked post, every follow and every tweet of mine for the last two years that we have been together, and extracted 5 pictures.
My reaction to it was to tell her via text that is was a bit cringe on my end, but I have no use of these pictures and no attachment to the woman posing in these pics. I apologised to her, explaining that I realised that it wasn’t a classy thing to say in a relationship, and that I now realise it. My twitter acc has always been a dumpster for a lot of stuff in my life (think of it as an alternative journal that no one reads). I told her that i also realised that this could’ve hurt her, and made her feel disrespected, and apologised for this as well. I also assured her that this wouldn’t happen again, and promptly deleted said like contents from my twitter likes.
She told me that was some kind of a baboon behaviour, that she feels disgusted by me, and that she discovered a face of me that she didn’t either suspected or envisioned considering that she thought of me of someone with manners and intelligence, bringing my age into the discussion.
I, on my end, having no attachment, no use, and no special interest toward said pictures, thought that she had every right to be upset, but that would be it after a few days/weeks, cause the apology was sincere, and the offense doesn’t feel major to me. We also didn’t have the discussion conversation regarding our online activities, so I only realised how serious it was for her when she sent the message.
Fast forward tonight, when she said via a long text that she accepts and respects my apology, that she feels attacked in her morals, and probably won’t forget or go over that event. She tells in the text that me liking pictures of a woman so so « vulgar » and most likely phototoshoped is bizarre to her, especially since she is a very different woman in the way that outside romantic moments she is sober on the way she dresses and makes up. She mentions how she doesn’t like her own body at the moment cause she gained a bit of weight, so that hurts even more. The end of the texts mentions how this is a drop on the vase, that’s drawing her away from the dreams she had for us, makes her feel like our ambitions will never coincide. Ends up with something along the lines of « I love you, I’m happy that you are part of my life, but WHEN it’ll end, it’ll only be the next logical step »
Well after that long overall recap, I’d like advices and opinions. Mostly about my mistake, and how to own up to it, cause I do not want this relationship to end if I can help it.
Thanks for reading
EDIT (TLDR) TLDR : GF found my twitter account, saw 5 lingerie pics I liked there after looking at everything on the acc. Now she feels disgusted by me and envisions the end of the relationship.