Submitted by ThrowRANaiveBelt t3_zqr8yt in relationship_advice
I[F24] have been talking to this guy[M28] for two months. We went to one brunch and one dinner date (only kissed goodbye to each other). We had clear communication that we both are looking for relationship and not hookup. He initiates most of the texting and sends me goodmornings/nights.
Then, he invited me to his home yesterday. We had whiskey and he cooked lasagna for me. We watched a few sitcoms and he kissed me. This turned into a hot steamy makeout session. He then asked me for a blow job for which I said no (as I didn't want to go that further). We kissed further and then he tried to force my head to his crotch. I firmly said no. I didn't think much about it that time and we continued kissing. He also spanked me really hard without any consent (my buttocks and breasts). We then cuddled and he asked again for blowjob. I again said no.
He then made me coffee and I left for my home.
Now that I think about it, I am not sure how to feel about this. Is this behavior abusive? Should I proceed with him? Is he only looking for hookup, that's why he doesn't care about me? Why to put do much efforts in texting, cooking and other dates if he just wanted sex?
I texted him about this. He didn't apologize but said we don't have to do this next time as he wants my comfort. We have good chemistry otherwise. Should I give him another chance or move on? What do you think reddit people?
Tldr: I[F24] don't know how to feel about this date with the guy[M28] I am seeing. He tried to force my head down and spanked me without consent. Is this behaviour abusive or not?