Submitted by throwra_hialah t3_zyqmzl in relationship_advice
Tldr: I told my bf I loved an actor, he’s upset that I said I loved an actor but not him and is semi equating it to being unfaithful I think?? Wtf??
I’m 19F, my bf is 22M, we’ve been dating 3 months.
I, like most people (I believe) have celebrity crushes. Those people you find attractive but know you’ll never be in the same room as or ever have a chance with. I feel it’s fairly normal to be attracted to celebrities, for most of them it’s part of their JOB to look hot.
Recently my bf asked if I wanted to watch a movie and I responded ‘omg yes that has X in it, I love him!’
My bf looks at me weirdly and asks me if I said I loved him. I said yeah he’s one of my favorite actors. My bf then gets a kinda shitty attitude and goes ‘oh so you love him but not me okay’
Me and my bf have only been together 3 months so we haven’t said I love you or even TALKED about it so I was super confused. Bf decided he didn’t want to watch the movie anymore and seemed irritated so I asked him what was wrong. After a bit he finally began grilling me about why I ‘loved’ this guy. I was again confused and said X was cute and talented and one of my favorite actors, what’s the big deal?? He was all upset that I ‘loved’ someone else while with him. I tried to explain that I loved his movies and his characters, not HIM, ffs I don’t know the guy or who he is, he’s a celeb crush and told him I assumed he had female celeb crushes. He got really upset and said absolutely not, he’d never even look at or think about another woman that way while with me and I was super disrespectful talking about how I was in love with another guy in front of him, and implied I wasn’t attracted to him (bf) if I thought he (actor) was hot.
This is my first relationship so idk maybe I did fuck up here. Me and my girlfriends talk about our fave movies and actors and when we say we love them it doesn’t mean we’re IN LOVE with them just that we’re fans. He’s been super cold lately and sharp with me and I’m starting to worry that maybe I did fuck things up. Please help me understand wtf is going on.