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The most clear example is the issue with coaching and the ex husband. I came to him asking him what he thought. "This is the situation. This is how I feel. This is how she feels. Am I wrong here?" My dad validated how I felt but gave me some compromise ideas that I presented to her, which have worked out so far. Our mutual friend suggested that I try to be more understanding of her perspective, and that I would need to give up my pride on the matter. My peers understood how I felt but didn't know how they would deal with the situation, as we couldn't just ask him to leave if he wasn't making a scene.

Talking to her is usually very easy and most of the time, we can come to some sort of consensus to move forward. But there are times when we just can't agree on something, and it becomes difficult to negotiate when neither will budge. When it starts to boil to one of us saying "This is how I feel" and the other one responds with "well you made me feel that way too," it's my sign to look for alternative perspectives.

So, it was always an agreement but once YOU landed a dream job, that's it?

It's about you resenting your wife, you being sad, you whatever.

And what about her? What about her resentment? What about her dreams?

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Too soon as people say, if you have no other reason for moving in together just wait at least until you've been together for a year. Also where I'm from you can rent out your apartment second hand for up to two years while doing trial living with a partner. Not sure anything similar exists for you.

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The argument was mostly her being upset I fell asleep whenever she was upset in the other room, she said she wants someone who will be more comforting whenever she’s ready for them to be and not someone who will fall asleep. And it was just an old picture of her in her mom’s old apartment, it bothered her so much because she’s very sensitive to that subject and doesn’t like to invite energies into her life and she said that’s what I did

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Do you consider sexting cheating ?

OK that makes more sense. I’m of a mine were you may need to start making other friends. Do you have other people to go to that are outside of the group.

You can still say we broke up because he cheated and leave it at that. Because when you don’t do that you’re not even sticking up for yourself, you’re protecting his needs over your own. And he already did that. I had a group in my 20s like that to an eventually I just moved away from them. To nine own self be true.

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What specifically have you compromised on? Secondly therapy for you because you need to build the trust you have in your own perspective and decisions. If you have compromised so much is that healthy for you? Are you over stretching your boundaries and comfort for a seemingly healthy relationship? Is she fully healed from her past relationship? Also I'm extremely worried about her not addressing the children's behavior. If that escalates then you're in actual danger and you would need to leave her regardless of your feelings for her.

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Doesn't make much sense. Something is missing here.

What was the argument even over? It seems like you’re skipping over the important parts. What picture did you say was chaotic? Why did it bother her?

To me this would be cheating. Married 12 years monogamously.

You know you don’t need to keep reposting this over and over again right Lmao?

I’m sorry I’m in a bit of a head space, what context do you need?

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Why do you keep telling her? Are you telling her that so and so thinks she’s wrong or something? I just can’t imagine why you’d be bringing up these discussions to begin with.

It’s normal for people to discuss their personal life with their friends and family.

What is her actual issue with it? Does she feel like she’s being painted in a bad light?

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