Yeah, he doesn’t want to get married so I would let him go and find somebody else. Immediately they’ll go file custody papers because things get ugly when people separate. Or move away and then file custody papers. You can live how you wanna live.

[removed]

To answer the question at the end of your last paragraph, I just feel like in some way I want to be the best that she’s had. I see it as if she’s satisfied with me she wouldnt even think about her prior flings

[removed]

He doesn’t want to marry you. You can’t force him. Either propose yourself or accept being not married.

[deleted]

Everyone has a past and it’s likely that any girl you’re with now or in the future will have had someone “better” than you. But she’s choosing to be with you and that’s what matters. She could have stayed with one of those other guys but chose you instead. Pull your head out of your ass and move on or you’ll lose her. You should definitely see a therapist. Also, QUIT HAVING DETAILED CONVERSATIONS ABOUT PAST RELATIONSHIPS/HOOKUPS FFS!

I know you want friends, but let go of this friend group there’s racist as anything. They are not your friends friends don’t behave like that find friends in a different way. When I first went out on my own, and I was very young I had all kinds of friends find. I had old people, friends, young people, all kinds of diversity as I was in a big city. And I was happy with them.

[removed]

Welcome to /r/relationship_advice. Please make sure you read our rules here. We'd like to take this time to remind users that:

• We do not allow any type of am I the asshole? or situations/content involving minors

• Any sort of namecalling, insults,etc will result in the comment being removed and the user being banned. (Including but not limited to: slut, bitch, whore, for the streets, etc. It does not matter to whom you are referring.)

• ALL advice given must be good, ethical advice. Joke advice or advice that is conspiratorial or just plain terrible will be removed, and users my be subject to a ban.

• No referencing hateful subreddits and/or their rhetoric. Examples include, but is not limited to: red/blue/black/purplepill, PUA, FDS, MGTOW, etc. This includes, but is not limited to, referring to people as alpha/beta, calling yourself or users "friend-zoned", referring to people as Chads, Tyrones, or Staceys, pick-me's, or pornsick. Any infractions of this rule will result in a ban. This is not an all-inclusive list.

• All bans in this subreddit are permanent. You don't get a free pass.

• What we cannot give advice on: rants, unsolicited advice, medical conditions/advice, mental illness, letters to an ex, "body counts" or number of sexual partners, legal problems, financial problems, situations involving minors, and/or abuse (violence, sexual, emotional etc). All of these will be removed and locked. This is not an all-inclusive list.

If you have any questions, please send us a modmail.

#This is an automatic comment that appears on all posts. This comment does not necessarily mean your post violates any rules.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

[removed]

[removed]

[removed]

[removed]

If he won't take counselling seriously I'm not sure you have many other options. He has trust/insecurity issues that you can't talk your way out of. He needs help, but he needs to want to be better or it won't stick.

[removed]

It's not a question of it probably being an insecurity; it's absolutely your own insecurities. It's certainly not an uncommon one, but it's ultimately one you need to work to remediate.

So there's a few things here. First, no one's holding a gun to her head to be with you. She's with you because she wants to be. She obviously enjoys sex with you. Comparing yourself will only make you crazy, and it's unnecessary. Even if you're objectively not the best sex she's ever had, it doesn't mean sex with you isn't great. You also might very well be the best she's had. Let that go.

Next, if you really have no other option but to break up with her because of this, then it unfortunately is what it is. Just understand that just about everyone you date is going to have a past.

Finally, you're sort of being a hypocrite. You're upset about her past. But you have a past yourself. Does having sex with other people change who you are as a person and partner? I assume not. As such, why would you look at her differently?

If this got cross posted to r/AmItheAsshole the comments section would probably give you a lot of insight into your behavior- which is terrible from start to finish between objectifying your wife who sounds more like a sex slave then an equal partner in your marriage, to trying to gaslight your best friend.

Definitely distance.

Welcome to /r/relationship_advice. Please make sure you read our rules here. We'd like to take this time to remind users that:

• We do not allow any type of am I the asshole? or situations/content involving minors

• Any sort of namecalling, insults,etc will result in the comment being removed and the user being banned. (Including but not limited to: slut, bitch, whore, for the streets, etc. It does not matter to whom you are referring.)

• ALL advice given must be good, ethical advice. Joke advice or advice that is conspiratorial or just plain terrible will be removed, and users my be subject to a ban.

• No referencing hateful subreddits and/or their rhetoric. Examples include, but is not limited to: red/blue/black/purplepill, PUA, FDS, MGTOW, etc. This includes, but is not limited to, referring to people as alpha/beta, calling yourself or users "friend-zoned", referring to people as Chads, Tyrones, or Staceys, pick-me's, or pornsick. Any infractions of this rule will result in a ban. This is not an all-inclusive list.

• All bans in this subreddit are permanent. You don't get a free pass.

• What we cannot give advice on: rants, unsolicited advice, medical conditions/advice, mental illness, letters to an ex, "body counts" or number of sexual partners, legal problems, financial problems, situations involving minors, and/or abuse (violence, sexual, emotional etc). All of these will be removed and locked. This is not an all-inclusive list.

If you have any questions, please send us a modmail.

#This is an automatic comment that appears on all posts. This comment does not necessarily mean your post violates any rules.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

You’re right. Trust me. I would give this same advice to a friend. I am just saying that up and leaving is not really possible in the moment and I have no clue how to get my point across

Wow. You have some audacity. You admit to being in love with Liz but don’t want to marry her, but expect her to continue being your friend anyway? This is the perfect example of “you can’t have your cake and eat it too.”

Tell your mother. First, as a mother, I would be really sad that you had to find that out. Secondly, as a wife, I would want to know.

Thank you for your reply. I’m moreso just like in shock over the whole situation. Am I weird to be grossed out/confused about their second date!? Forget that he was already dating me, I just feel bad for this kid and his safety.

Personally, even though the age difference is only 10 years, this man is grooming you. I don’t believe on your own that you want to have other partners I think you want to fall in love and be with the person you love. And I think some of your distress is because he is pushing you so that he can cheat when he’s gone and make it legal so you have to deal with it. You need to get out of this relationship. Your suicidal thoughts though probably have origins in other things previously are due to stress of living in a way you don’t really want to live. And I’m not sure if you’re even aware of it.