OH HELL NO! Do not give this woman your eggs. You have a limited number of eggs and if you decide to have children you may not be able to after this procedure.

Also, you know she is a shit mother. Why would you do that to another child? It's cruel. She doesn't deserve another child.

That’s your takeaway? Whatever.

How was I stalking her??? She was the one who unblocked me

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You already know the answer.

You either break up or you accept the abuse.

You are not the problem. She is. She has major trust issues and jealousy issues. There are probably lots of insecurities also.

That is not something that you can fix. And it's not something that she can fix on her own. She needs to go see a therapist to get over all her issues before she can have a healthy relationship.

There is absolutely nothing you can do to make her not think that you are cheating. There is absolutely no way to prove that you are not cheating.

You will not fix her. Talking from experience with this kind of girl.
It only gets uglier.

He claims he would have no issue if the roles were reversed. But I call bullshit on that. He can only say that because he knows I wouldn’t do something so disrespectful.

What “sexual issue”? What did he ask to do? You said a whole lot without saying anything at all.

See all the fun you were "missing out" on? FOMO strikes again. Chalk this up as a learning experience and stop letting your genitals make decisions for you. Or don't, but learn to live with the consequences. Actions have real repercussions.

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You give terrible advice and should break up with your therapist.

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Our living and kitchen are open. She was in the living room and the items were in the kitchen.

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Bro she was cheating on you, think of it as a gift. Totally forget about her, purge her from your mind and life. Move on find a new thang. What do u think she is going to do with the new guy same thing she did to you. Don't look back, especially when she comes crawling back..and she will.

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A relationship being run by insecurities is not a healthy one. It's her responsibility to work on her insecurities, not yours to be bending over backwards to accommodate them.

"Can someone give me some guidance on where to go from here?"

Yes, go get a new girlfriend, this one is broken.

I know you're hurting, but this mindset is sooo toxic

>but now I'm starting to think I waas right all along and that she was cheating on me the entire time.

There is no possible way you can know this. You'd be surprised how quick things can move for some people.

Block her on everything and work on YOUR healing. Don't focus so much on what she is doing.

She literally hits all fucking four to a T.

BigMan, I suggest you see a psychologist to obtain a professional opinion on what you and your children are dealing with. My concern is that the 4 behaviors described above are red flags for BPD (borderline personality disorder), which my exW has.

I caution that BPD is not something -- like chickenpox -- that a person either "has" or "doesn't have." Instead, it is a spectrum disorder, which means everyone occasionally exhibits all BPD traits to some degree (usually at a low level if the person is healthy). BPD traits are primitive defenses that, when used appropriately and in moderation, increase our chances of survival.

At issue, then, is not whether your ex-fiancée exhibits BPD traits. Of course she does. We all do. Rather, at issue is whether she exhibits those traits at a strong and persistent level (i.e., is on the upper end of the BPD spectrum).

Importantly, I'm not suggesting your ex-fiancée has full-blown BPD. Only a professional can determine that. Instead, I'm suggesting you consider whether she may be a person with many strong BPD symptoms (i.e., may be a "pwBPD").

I’ve been steadily abused by my now ex-fiancée.

If your ex-fiancée is a pwBPD, BigMan, she carries much anger inside from early childhood. You therefore don't have to do a thing to CREATE the anger. Rather, you only have to do or say some minor thing that triggers a release of anger that is already there. This is why a pwBPD can burst into a rage in only a few seconds.

Moreover, the key defining characteristic of BPD is the inability to regulate one's own emotions, resulting in unstable behavior. This is why, outside the USA, most countries call this disorder "emotionally unstable personality disorder" (EUPD).

She has slapped me multiple times.

A substantial share of pwBPD never physically abuse their partners. Many of them do, however. This is why more than 30 empirical studies have found the physical abuse of a spouse or partner to be strongly associated with BPD.

And this is why "Intense, inappropriate anger" is one of the 9 defining traits for BPD. Indeed, the terms "anger," "impulsive behavior," and "unstable" appear in 4 of the 9 BPD Symptoms.

I miss and love my ex-fiancée.

If she is a pwBPD, she likely loves you too, BigMan. An untreated pwBPD is capable of loving you very intensely -- but it is the very immature type of love you see in young children. This means she will occasionally flip -- in only seconds -- from Jekyll (adoring you) to Hyde (devaluing or hating you). And a few hours or days later, she can flip back again just as quickly. These rapid flips arise from a primitive defense called "black-white thinking."

Like a young child, a pwBPD never had an opportunity to learn the emotional skills needed to handle two strong conflicting feelings (e.g., love and hate) at the same time. This means she has great difficulty tolerating ambiguities, uncertainties, and the other gray areas of close interpersonal relationships. She thus will subconsciously split off the conflicting feeling, putting it far out of reach of her conscious mind.

With young children, this "splitting" is evident when the child will adore Daddy while he's bringing out the toys but, in only a few seconds, will flip to hating Daddy when he takes one toy away. Importantly, this behavior does not mean that the child has stopped loving Daddy. Rather, it means that her conscious mind is temporarily out of touch with those loving feelings.

Similarly, a pwBPD will categorize everyone close to her as "all good" ("with me") or "all bad" ("against me"). And she will recategorize someone from one polar extreme to the other -- in just seconds -- based solely on a minor comment or action. This B-W thinking also will be evident in her frequent use of all-or-nothing expressions such as "You NEVER..." and "You ALWAYS...."

I cannot mentally handle it anymore.

Again, I suggest you see a psychologist -- for a visit or two all by yourself -- to obtain a candid professional opinion on what you and your kids are dealing with. Whenever strong BPD warning signs are appearing, it is important to see your own psychologist, i.e., one who has not treated or seen your GF.

In that way, BigMan, you're ensured that the psychologist is ethically bound to protect YOUR best interests, not hers. I mention this because therapists generally are loath to tell a high-functioning pwBPD the name of her disorder. They often decide that it is not in her best interests to be told.

Of course, learning to spot BPD warning signs will not enable you to diagnose her issues. Although strong BPD symptoms are easy to spot, only a professional can determine whether they are so severe and persistent as to constitute a full-blown disorder.

Yet, like learning warning signs for a stroke or heart attack, learning those for BPD may help you avoid a very painful situation -- and can help you decide when professional guidance is needed. I therefore suggest you take a quick look at my list of 18 BPD Warning Signs to see if most sound very familiar. If so and you have questions, BigMan, I would be glad to discuss them with you.

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This is WAY too heavy for a 6 month long relationship. She knew your job and its nature when she met you, if she doesn’t like it, she can get fucked (respectfully).

You seriously need to bounce ASAP. If she exposes you, deal with that as it happens and get the police involved if necessary.

Impossible to advise you with such a vague post.

Bottom line, don’t have sex you don’t want to have.

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