He is toxic, and unhinged. If someone decides to guilt trip you into staying with them it is big sign to really leave.

If someone is blackmailing with unaliving himself threats, you paradoxically need to run away immediately, and cut all contact. Are you willing to give up your life for him? If "no", then don't do it. If he devudes to unalive himself it us own choice, and you are in no wsy responsible for that.

You did nothing wrong and if he wants to think you’re a coward he can. You know you aren’t.

You can’t control how he reacts, you can’t make him think something he doesn’t. All you can do is leave. His loss!

I know he is that’s the issue , but I’ve tried to leave twice and he just says I’m being a coward and need to face what I’ve done. The issue is I don’t think it’s that big of a deal we wasn’t together just talking. And he’s told all his friends and stuff, like he’s lied about alot of stuff and uses the suicide stuff also as a way I’ll stay and idk what to do it’s draining me and I’ve cut everyone else off

As a trans woman, you deserve better than someone who cheats on you.

He is manipulating you. What you describe sounds terrible for you and it’s going to damage you and break you down. Please for your own sake, leave him. Trust me, this is not what a good relationship looks like.

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19F 24M Together for 2.5 years meaning yall were at best

17 and 22. Knew eachither for seven

So met at about 12 and 17. Wtf?

You were groomed by this man. He cheats on you repeatedly. This age gap. He doesn't love you he is using you. You are a victim. This is genuinely awful im so fucking sorry. This age gap is criminal. You need to fucking leave this is awful

Buzzinga 😂😂

Thankyou all for sharing your perspectives. I was concerned I was being too harsh but I can see this isn’t going to work in the long term.

Lol! I have been compared to him several times before

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He may honestly want those things, AND he may want to chase every warm-blooded body he can find. Those two things aren't necessarily mutually exclusive. Way too many red flags here. Lots of lies. Some people see life as something you should try and take as much as you can get away with, and they usually end up with givers who can't understand why their partner can't give back. You don't have to feel like you've been lied to all this time. He may have been genuine in his love for you, but clearly he also wants to do things outside the relationship that most people would consider deal breakers. He's too selfish to consider monogamy and putting your needs first. You're young and you'll find someone who will give you back everything you're able to give them.

I really appreciate your honesty. You’re right, I think it’s hard for me to believe that he has malicious intentions when it’s seemed like he really loves me (talking about marriage, our future together, being with me forever etc). But I think this is a part of him he can’t get rid of, no matter how much he “loves” anyone.

“My boyfriend has cheated in the past, and is almost certainly doing it again.” That’s all you needed to say. Doesn’t matter if Trans girls are involved, or anything else you said. Your boyfriend is allergic to being faithful to you. Don’t you deserve better? You’re looking for excuses because breakups are hard and you’ve invested a lot of time in this relationship. However, he’s investing his time seeing how many times he can make you look like a fool. Don’t play his games. Sexuality isn’t the issue here.

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Welcome to /r/relationship_advice. Please make sure you read our rules here. We'd like to take this time to remind users that:

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• Any sort of namecalling, insults,etc will result in the comment being removed and the user being banned. (Including but not limited to: slut, bitch, whore, for the streets, etc. It does not matter to whom you are referring.)

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To put it simply, Jon needs to step up and deal with this. It was easy for him to turn a blind eye before, but he's seen it now and you've called out the behaviour so he's aware its a problem to you. He also should have put her straight when she was being unkind at the dinner you hosted - she went on about an orgy and hand fed him?!?!

I have a feeling he's not going to do much about it.

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This isn't all on you to manage, John needs to be the one putting up boundaries with his friends. I mean, yes, Ella is trying to mean girl you out of the relationship, but why is he allowing her to treat you like that? She literally fed him from her hand but why did he just let her? He no longer has the excuse of not knowing what she's like because she did you both the favor of showing her true colors right in front of him! I'm sure he wants to give her the benefit of the doubt but if he loves you, then he needs to be on your side. He needs to make it clear that he won't tolerate Ella treating you with anything less than simple respect.