Recent comments in /f/relationship_advice

cinnamongirl73 t1_jebeecu wrote

Ok, Pep talk time!!! You are WORTHY!!! Of a BETTER MAN!!! Repeat that!!! He is NOT worthy of YOU! Look what he just did. He proved it. He KNOWS you’re struggling with all of this, especially now that he knows and he’s going to do WHATEVER HE CAN TO KEEP YOU ON THE HOOK!!!

The next time he shows up, tell him he better have your stuff (luggage, etc) you’re making the decisions now. You’re keeping the cat, give you the key, find a roommate, move, do whatever you have to do, but take charge, but when you do, make sure it’s to end it. He’s already shown you who he is. You can’t “help or save him.” All you can do is turn your back on him. And girl, I KNOW it hurts, but the quicker you do it, the sooner you will heal!

You have to do this like ripping off a band aid. Make it quick, it’s less painful. Trust me. When he’s not there to remind you of his presence, it WILL FADE AWAY!!!

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JockoJohnson69 t1_jebbwiq wrote

What does you feeling awkward and disrespected have to do with women’s rights? And why are you so worried about insulting her - she has no problem insulting you. As others have mentioned, you can’t stop her from posting that but you don’t need to put up with it either. Either deal with it or break up if she isn’t going to respect you.

Edit: and don’t write to her - talk with her face to face.

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Dvusmnd t1_jebb0te wrote

What he means is he will do a better job of manipulating you into thinking he is doing better.

He has to recognize that he has a problem and work towards actually fixing himself. He is this way probably from some trauma he’s experienced but it’s very serious stuff.

People he does not respect he Will confidently manipulate or think he’s manipulating them. They can choose their own reality if it gets too bad. They convince themselves about what is really happening and gaslight others to fit that reality. It comes from a place of disrespect. You are not respected.

There are better humans available.

Find people who can be trustworthy, earn your respect and can be vulnerable and highly empathetic and you can avoid these types of people.

Hugs to you. You may have dodged a bullet.

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sadgirlthrowaway32 OP t1_jeba1gj wrote

I have this nagging thought there is smth that I did that makes me worthy of whatever he did to me. Like if I was prettier or better he wouldn’t do this to me… it is very hard to get over that.

It’s also funny bc him and his friends said multiple times that he would not find someone better than me as a whole package

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Dvusmnd t1_jeb8dw5 wrote

That sounds like sociopath behavior. You need to talk to him about this. If he responds with lack of empathy to your points then I think you should find someone that treasures your feelings and respects your boundaries.

Signs of a Sociopath Lack of empathy for others. Impulsive behavior. Attempting to control others with threats or aggression. Using intelligence, charm, or charisma to manipulate others. Not learning from mistakes or punishment. Lying for personal gain. Showing a tendency to physical violence and fights.

If you intend to stay in this relationship, you need to learn how to use verbal judo to communicate with a person like this. I would take extra precautions to avoid pregnancy cause the last thing you want is to have to coparent with someone like that.

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