Recent comments in /f/relationship_advice

ElectricBugs t1_jedqvvw wrote

Reply to Is my marriage over ? 31M/29F by [deleted]

You say you had to basically beg for sex. Do you mean you coerced her into sex? That you nagged her until she gave in to stop you from harassing her? Because that's rape

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Katseye1975 t1_jedqqi0 wrote

Reply to Is my marriage over ? 31M/29F by [deleted]

Coming from a "broken home " if you will.... I will tell you that seeing your parents in a bad marriage is much worse for the kids than seeing both parents move on to healthy relationships separately. When my mom finally divorced my father when I was 11, I asked her why she waited so long. I could see that neither of them were happy at all, and it caused stress in the house. If she won't help work on the marriage, then you would probably be better to separate sooner rather than later. Your child will be happier for it, and you can model the kind of relationship you hope for him to have.

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Here_To_Read_ t1_jedq7r5 wrote

Reply to comment by ThrowRAselfdestruct in I, 23M ended a perfectly good relationship with my gf who's 22F for what feels like a mental problem and fits a pattern i desperately want to break out of.... by ThrowRAselfdestruct

Bro your parents didn't even have it all together. Otherwise they wouldn't have projected their being overwhelmed by literally torturing you throughout your childhood. Nobody has it together. We all just pretend. And all the people you see that seem to have it all together are struggling on another part of their life that you don't see because they don't let you.

I am not a doctor or therapist. I have watched too much Grey's anatomie and new amsterdam probably but your medical history of probable malnutrition might also play a role in all of this. This is a rat's tail with no end unless you find help.

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ThrowRAselfdestruct OP t1_jedpde8 wrote

Reply to comment by Here_To_Read_ in I, 23M ended a perfectly good relationship with my gf who's 22F for what feels like a mental problem and fits a pattern i desperately want to break out of.... by ThrowRAselfdestruct

yes perhaps ive been screwed over in several different areas of life by lots of different people and institutions. but im not entirely sure what the acknowledgement of this really accomplishes. free will free judgement free thinking and logical decision making seems to work flawlessly for everyone else around me and i know im not a very good person, often being rude, mean, selfish, and self destructive, but i have to be capable of choosing the right actions without getting sterilized with antidepressents right???

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ThrowRAselfdestruct OP t1_jedoyer wrote

Reply to I, 23M ended a perfectly good relationship with my gf who's 22F for what feels like a mental problem and fits a pattern i desperately want to break out of.... by ThrowRAselfdestruct

i know this is likely unrelated but i grew up with (and still have) a super rare esophagus disease called eosiniphilic esophagidas, which affects my digestion of foods and causes me to be unable to eat any gluten, dairy, wheat, eggs, nuts, soy, pork, fish, and some fruits and vegetables, with an anaphylaxis to egg. when i eat the foods im allergic too i cant digest them and it slowly burns a hole in my esophagus and raises my red blood cell counts. the vast majority of people who have this disease are on feeding tubes. i am not. because when i was 7 i went off all food for an entire year and had only formula drinks, then would go to a hospital once every 3 months, been given knockout gas (everytime had fear of never waking up lots of anxiety attacks), get an upper endoscopy, and then they would test around 3-5 foods on me to see if they would make me tick, and if i didnt react to them i would get to add them to my diet. this lasted until i was 15.

i have had a couple of near death experiences with anaphylactic attacks, even one where my throat was completely closed shut. childhood was pretty alienating with being so different to everyone around me but i guess we made it work.

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