Recent comments in /f/relationship_advice

PatientLettuce42 t1_jeedeyk wrote

Reply to My (30f) bf (28m) doesnt have social media my friends say its a red flag by throwRAanfrwo

Your friends sound like the real red flag here. I am 30 and have no social media either. I consciously quit facebook back in the day and have never picked up something new since then, except reddit (whatsapp aint no social media either).

I think its sad how much your friends seem to already be consumed by their social media addiction or whatever that they can't even imagine a life without it or anyone else living without it.

TBH it would only be a PLUS for me if the woman I date has no social media. It would just show me that our opinions on the matter are aligned, because social media is like poison to the brain.

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Naive-Selection-7113 t1_jeecx7g wrote

Reply to My crush(20F) rejected me(20M) said she only wants to be friends with me by Rinzler_Tron

You can absolutely be friends but the romantic side is dead, not wounded, it is dead because if you let yourself pretend there is a glimmer of hope you will do yourself a great disservice.

There is nothing wrong with having a person you like be a friend right now but that is all they will be. Good luck finding a good one elsewhere OP

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AutoModerator t1_jeecf17 wrote

Reply to My (30f) bf (28m) doesnt have social media my friends say its a red flag by throwRAanfrwo

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ThrowRAspaghetti666 OP t1_jeecawy wrote

Reply to comment by sliverofoptimism in My [19M] girlfriend [19F] slept with another guy whilst things were complicated between us. Really need advice. by ThrowRAspaghetti666

It’s like an earworm, I just can’t get the thought of her with this other guy out of my head. Then I start getting annoyed with myself for letting it happen in the first place. Whenever I’m doing nothing it’s the first things that pops into my head and I don’t know how to stop it.

I can’t control it. Will it just stop with time? It’s always worse when I’m not with her.

Thank you for your response though. It’s kind of what I need to be hear

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sliverofoptimism t1_jeeb4of wrote

Reply to comment by ThrowRAspaghetti666 in My [19M] girlfriend [19F] slept with another guy whilst things were complicated between us. Really need advice. by ThrowRAspaghetti666

You just….do? She didn’t wrong you, this has nothing to do with you. You weren’t dating and she dated someone else. How does that impact you? You have every signal to her to move on and she did. You weren’t LDR or anything, you were just keeping in touch with someone you later decided to date.

Are you sure you’re ready to date? Somehow feeling slighted by actions before your relationship isn’t a great signal if that

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throwawaybreakuphel OP t1_jeeap76 wrote

Reply to comment by [deleted] in My (23f) boyfriend (30m) treats me differently when I don't feel like having sex by throwawaybreakuphel

I do all those things though, I've communicated all those things many times and we have an incredibly compatible sex life. It's just the disappointment on the occasions where I don't feel like having sex that are difficult for me. I'm very serious when I say if I was up for it 50 times a day, he would still be wanting it more.

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throwawaybreakuphel OP t1_jeeajlw wrote

Reply to comment by [deleted] in My (23f) boyfriend (30m) treats me differently when I don't feel like having sex by throwawaybreakuphel

The age gap is definitely a valid concern - my independence has definitely been threatening to him sometimes, I think he can be surprised by it due to my age but I had to grow up much faster than most. He can be immature in a lot of ways so we even each other out quite nicely. I don't feel like the issues we have are specifically due to our ages, if anything I think he's outgrown a lot of toxic behaviours from when he was younger and he's at a stage now where he can work on them by discussing them with me.

The hygiene factor is due to depression and he immediately suggested it himself as a contributing factor when I was getting infections. I haven't had an infection since, so he is capable of recognising when he needs to change something and he's been vigilant about it (he was never unclean or disgusting by any stretch of the imagination, now he just makes a point of cleaning up straight before every single time there will be any penetration)

I definitely won't move in until this is sorted out. I have a lease I can extent for another year if need be.

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