Recent comments in /f/relationship_advice

Liveware_Failure t1_jefu76p wrote

So you essentially forgave him without consequences. Really sorry to say this, but he's probably going to cheat again.

There's an amazing Maya Angelou quote which applies here. 'When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.'

You're worried about the wrong thing here, his childhood friend isn't the issue, your boyfriend is the person who cheated on you and only stopped when he got caught.

5

AnalystOk5065 t1_jeftsxw wrote

My advice: as soon as things seem pretty difficult for you I would do couples counseling. And maybe start putting that seed out there now about how couples counseling is a good thing. For the first 10 years in my marriage my wife thought therapy was just for crazy people and would get really angry if I suggested it, and to get couples counseling just meant we had a failed marriage. Since she started regular therapy her life has definitely changed for the better. It's important that you are both in it to improve your relationship.

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1

tickleyourfanny t1_jeftjw9 wrote

girl it was over the first time he cheated..look at you now, you are paranoid, dont trust the guy and are waiting for the other shoe to fall...

> but I was very stupid and naive

well if someone is exposed for what they are, then you can no longer be naive...ignoring what that person does and is, does kinda make you still 'stupid'. anyways, just find a new person who hasn't cheated on you. its not gonna work out and you will have these exact feeling for the entirety of your time with your cheater. Just move on, you will love someone else I assure you

5

MarvellousIntrigue t1_jeftcsc wrote

Dude she sounds like a horrible horrible person! She clearly doesn’t give a crap how she made you feel! Those messages are so cold!

What is with the comments on your body and the military! That’s just low! You look ill?!? What… you got fit?? Either way, it’s a superficial thing to say!

Forget her and move on! She isn’t worth anymore tears!

Also, what did you mean 6 guys? Are you saying she has slept with 6 men before you?? Was this an issue for you?

9

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1

AutoModerator t1_jefszli wrote

Welcome to /r/relationship_advice. Please make sure you read our rules here. We'd like to take this time to remind users that:

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  • Any sort of namecalling, insults,etc will result in the comment being removed and the user being banned. (Including but not limited to: slut, bitch, whore, for the streets, etc. It does not matter to whom you are referring.)

  • ALL advice given must be good, ethical advice. Joke advice or advice that is conspiratorial or just plain terrible will be removed, and users my be subject to a ban.

  • No referencing hateful subreddits and/or their rhetoric. Examples include, but is not limited to: red/blue/black/purplepill, PUA, FDS, MGTOW, etc. This includes, but is not limited to, referring to people as alpha/beta, calling yourself or users "friend-zoned", referring to people as Chads, Tyrones, or Staceys, pick-me's, or pornsick. Any infractions of this rule will result in a ban. This is not an all-inclusive list.

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1

maybeimbonkers t1_jefssb5 wrote

My husband doesn't realize and will not accept his brother in law is causing issues.

I don't condone my behavior in the least. But I will say that I warned him many times to give me back my laptop. I felt very triggered that he took my laptop and was trying to act like I was the one at fault. He got mad that I was trying to take my laptop back. I told him it's completely unacceptable that he's acting this way and he laughed that I was calling him unacceptable after what I'm doing. Basically all this pushed me to what I did. Again, I know I am wrong. But I'm providing context for my actions.

0

Double_Rip_441 OP t1_jefsrs6 wrote

I don't expect it to go away, but I know people who have managed to work through it and get to a point where they still love each other and are romantically invested despite the disorder, one of them being related to my girlfriend actually. I've been working with her directly to try to figure this out but I'm reaching out to reddit for any advice that can help the situation rn

1