Recent comments in /f/rva

bkemp1984Part2 t1_j0ggiar wrote

I'll usually go to box offices around here for stuff to save on fees, but since my shows are almost never above $30 or $35, not too much shopping around. In the jam scene though people are very likely to unload for cheap or even give away or "miracle" a ticket.

For the recent Bill Strings show that sold out months ago, where tickets were $65, i got one miracled about 2 hours before show on CashorTrade and another for half off as we were walking in from our parking spot.

1

J-Colio t1_j0gfesf wrote

Not op, but I see what they mean because I opened the link to proof-read. The third... let's call it a sentence, is triggering, and that's as far as I felt like reading because of it.

You literally learn to not start a sentence with a conjunction in like middle school... Yet here we are reading "But addiction is treatable," with the misplaced comma at the end...

Also, they had the headings. "INTRODUCTION" Just introduce the piece with an introductory paragraph. Ain't nobody got time for you to introduce your introduction...

Those are the kind of points op was making. Those are also points that get shown super early when learning to write, so tripping up on them really turns people off of reading. The reader low-key assumes the person who wrote it is at a middle-school level... Not trying to be mean here or berate your friend, but that's the effect of poor writing, and you asked for critique.

Edit: have the [...]'s link to the same thing the headings link to. As a user experience that's where I tried to click to read more, so when it didn't I assumed that's all there was. I clicked back to read more casually, and found out. It's awkward to scroll up (mentally) to the top to read more.

4

dbakes80 OP t1_j0g3bz0 wrote

A good friend of mine with no experience in journalism or even writing for that matter. She put an ungodly amount of time and energy into trying to get to the truth of how all these opioid funds are being used. It’s a 10 part piece. Next section will be released early January. Just out of curiosity, and so I can give her your feedback, why do you think it’s trash?

3

nartarf t1_j0fcvtp wrote

The Zero sum thinking of capitalism poisons all. I recently learned the awful term “junkie broker” when trying to help a friend. They get a finders fee for getting people to rehab. They’ll gain your trust then ask for friends and families phone numbers gain their trust and even buy plane tickets to Florida.

Rehab billed insurance $3200 per day. Insurance paid $2400 per day. That’s $7200 for a 30 day stay. Finders fee is probably $2000+

he said “we’ll bill you for the deductible 3 times and then won’t send to collections or send more bills… just don’t pay.” Basically saying it’s completely free.

Excited to read more. Thanks for investigating.

9