Submitted by Independent_Type_428 t3_zpxugy in tifu
Throwaway account as my wife and friends are on here.
I (mid-30's male) fucked up today by deciding to release some energy while wanting to use my wife's dildo.
Pre-fuckup: In the last couple of months, my wife and I have been experimenting a bit more sexually via butt play. I am currently home from work as I have the next couple of weeks off for holiday. My wife had to go to work today, so I'm here alone. I have been going thru a bit of seasonal depression on top of my normal day-to-day anxiety. Which leads into...
The fuckup: Being a bit down and lonely, my brain had to bright idea to release a little bit of energy by deciding to jerk one off in the shower while also thinking "a little butt play would be nice". My wife and I have our own dildos - mine, a small 3" rounded one and hers, a 7" penis look-a-like. Having played with my dildo multiple times, I decide to get the bright idea "I wonder what her dildo would feel like". I hop in the shower, clean up my hind parts, lube up her dildo, stick it in, and go to town. Shoving it fully up there felt really nice. That was until... I finish, pull the dildo out, and there is a massive amount of shit buildup on her dildo. My brain goes "ok, no big deal, we can just clean this up". I go and get the sex toy cleaner and scrub the dildo really hard. Just to make sure it's nice and clean, I give the dildo a sniff and... HOLY HELL it reeks of shit. Ok, the toy cleaner wasn't enough, let's go get the body wash and scrub it again. Nope, it still smells like absolute shit.
Post-fuckup: I have now thrown away this dildo and am about to head to the sex shop to buy my wife a new dildo. I'm not really sure how I'm going to tell her, but I feel so embarrassed right now.
TL;DR - Home alone on holiday, I used my wife's dildo instead of mine to see how it feels, got shit all over it, and now have to buy her a new dildo.
​
*edit: I just got home from running some errands and getting my wife a new dildo. I talked to her during her lunch break and she found the situation hilarious.
Thanks for the comments regarding what to do in the future if I go about using a bigger dildo than the small one I currently use for me - as I have never ran into this (pun intended) shitty issue before.