Submitted by IAmGroot0947 t3_10ng85b in tifu
This literally just happened and we can’t stop laughing about it, but it wasn’t so funny in the moment.
I hadn’t seen my gf in a while and we went out for a fun night of cocktails with friends. Of course, Mother Nature is never on our side so it is her time of the month. No big deal.
We go out and have fun, come home, and get ready for bed. I wake up in the middle of the night and her nipple is showing, so I do what any normal man does, I get aroused and decide it’s sexy time.
She’s into it and we are having some fun exploring and having a bit of anal play. She decides she’s too lazy to get the lube, however, and just pushes me inside her. We have some hot sex, I finish, we crash in a pile of drunken ecstasy.
Fast forward to the morning and she comes out of the bathroom “I can’t get the tampon out. I can’t even feel it.” Mind you, my girl is a brilliant medical doctor, and at this point panic is setting in because she’s having flashbacks of septic shock cases from med school from this sort of thing. She’s equally concerned about having to go to the ER to have it removed.
I, having nothing to do with the medical field, do what all internet wizards do and look to Google for help. I then ask my Dr., now patient, not to fear, but to get me the lube and lay down on the bed. Begrudgingly, she does so. It’s me or a doctor friend and lots of embarrassment.
I lube her up and go in (not as hot as it sounds) No dice. I can’t feel the string. I ask her to lift her legs like she’s giving birth.
I get my fingers in up to the knuckle and feel the string. It slips my grasp at first, but I finally grab hold. Success!
For the rest of the day I’m to be addressed as doctor.
TL;DR by having sex with my girlfriend while she was wearing a tampon. I ultimately retrieved it and am now a hero.