This thing gave me a stroke halfway through.

Something seems wrong. A bidet is usually hooked up between the water supply and the toilet and the toilet only has a COLD water supply. Any heating of the water is done inside the bidet itself - at least that's how mine works, so a new water heater should not have made any difference. How the hell do you have your bidet hooked into hot water?!!

I capitalized it to make the distinction easier for your benefit, but its not strictly necessary. Based off his behavior, and by his own admission, OP knows which one he is

Learn how to be rejected. Of course she felt this way about you. You alienated yourself. Move on, try to learn from this.

Duly noted!

What we see here class is an example of someone learning what not to do from hurting others. What we should all learn is the same lesson so that women around the world can be treated as human being first and not sexual goals. It's fine to shoot your shot, but that's when you first meet someone.

This stuff needs to be taught in middle school and drilled repeatedly into boys and men's heads: no means no, but also more importantly any answer that isn't somewhere along the lines of "yes, yes, o God yes", then it's actually a no. A wincing yes means no, okay means no, maybe means no no oh God no, I have other plans means no, I'm washing my hair means no, etc etc. And if your timing just sucks, we'll you have the no, so you keep the no and live with the no and move on.

Women learn one way or another to make "soft" rejections to avoid confrontations, in large part due to survival. There's a metaphor I saw along the lines of women are bicycle traffic in a world of cars: a small mistake by either the bicycle or the car will kill the bicycle.

The sad fact is though pop culture from decades ago still forms something of the zeitgeist. Whether it's Pedophile Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark, or Han "Corner her in a closet while marooned in space forcing her to be rescued by C3P0" Solo, there's tons of situations that teach boys and men that if they just persist they'll win her heart and it doesn't matter what you do, and it's all wrong.

OP used “nice guy” throughout, not “Nice Guy.”

This exactly.

There is nothing wrong with asking your friend out. But being a sex pest is annoying, wrong, and abhorrent. You didn't ruin your chance of getting to be with her. You ruined your chance of getting to maintain a good friendship.

She does not want to be with you. Full stop. End of story.

If you want, you might be able to salvage a friendship out of this. If you can legitimately say that you are sorry. You realized that you were being a tool, and selfish, and putting her in an awkward position, and that you really value your friendship with her and would like to start over as friends and nothing more, she might engage with you in that fashion again. She's not obligated to. She may not want to after this. And if she does, that doesn't mean you get to pester her again in 6 months or a year.

She's given you her answer. You have to respect that. And if you can't handle that like an adult and move on, possibly with a friendship intact, then you haven't really learned your lesson.

And if you can accept it, but don't want to maintain the friendship, that's also your prerogative. Learn from this. Don't repeat the same mistake, and move on trying to find another partner.

Being a "Nice Guy" is different from being a nice guy. Nice Guys are toxic and manipulative douches, whereas nice guys are just good people.

Nice Guy has become a term used to describe men who behave as if they are owed things from women for simply being a decent human being. They dont realize that the mere fact of having this expectation means that they are not, in fact, decent human beings, because being kind to a woman with the expectation of a reward later on is not actually decent.

r/niceguys has a bunch of examples like this

[removed]

I’m so sorry. Poverty is traumatic, sudden disability is traumatic, you’re both going through quite a lot. You sound like a real nice guy. It’s totally understandable to slip up, especially if you didn’t have to worry about stuff like this previously. You’re not a loser. I grew up with two disabled parents in poverty and my mom was this wonderful angel of a woman who spent all her time taking care of other people, and that’s what everyone remembers about her. Her art, her company, her jokes. Love goes a long long way.

Over the last couple years I have become progressively more disabled myself, and I was so scared that I would be alone. I met someone so compassionate and loving, and I’m really happy now despite my disabilities. My partner is my rock, he helps me all the time without even thinking about it, anticipated needs, and loves me unconditionally, as I do him. But we both fuck up too sometimes in ways that affect the other person. He broke something kind of expensive a couple months ago and thought I was going to be really upset, but when I saw the look on his face, I couldn’t be mad at all. He’s worth a million expensive things I can’t even remember. I’m sure she understands and doesn’t see you as a loser at all. You’re probably her hero. A soda isn’t going to change that. ❤️

Also RTFM dude!

/r/EyeBleach

>i said some harsh truth, as why she should consider dating me, and that she should be consider dating me

So this girl didn't want to date you, tried to let you down nicely, and you started insulting her? What exactly were these "harsh truths?" And how on earth do you think you are the person to point them out after knowing her for a few months?

You can also make them yourself

Financial difficulties, but still wasting time and $5+ on a drive through soda that is mostly ice. Unreal.

OP has hypervicksemia, hyper meaning elevated, and emia relating to presence in blood. Doctors note that although OP had indeed fucked up, they made a full recovery.

Yes they are!

What is an anon?

Lol, it's funny how many commenters don't seem to know what a nice guy is. Because this story is a perfect example of nice guy behavior.

Nice guys are guys who try to pressure women into dating them, and/or refuse to take no for an answer. They all cannot believe that someone wouldn't be interested in them because they are a nice guy. Eventually they get the hint and go away after you snap at them, but act like you are overreacting and crazy because they are a nice guy. They also are known for fuck-zoning women. Basically befriending them only to get in their pants. "If only she realized how great of a catch I am!"

OP I'm glad you've been able to self reflect and learned from this situation.

Haha yes you're correct. It might work. I would guess maybe carpet under a vehicle or in their garage. I don't know, it was pretty gross carpet tho

It's not about timing. If she says no, it's never going to be a yes. She's just not into you. You got to learn to take no as the final answer.

My father in law had a stroke and lost The ability to work. It took so long to get disability, he just gave up.

Most claims are denied.

I hate that your takeaway is that you ruined your chance to bang her and not that you hurt your friend.

You learnt nothing.

Edit: more importantly, her telling you it is too soon just means she doesn't want to date you and just wanted to be friends. You should not have asked her out again. You should, especially not, ever, list "harsh truths" for why she should date you. That is very concerning language to describe what is most likely delusions you hold to be truths.

You are not even aware of how shit you were to her.

Seems like people don’t get your ironic use of nice guy. I got what you meant though.

Your twenties are for making these stupid mistakes and growing from them. Apologise, but don’t go over board with it. Say sorry that you were being dumb and just move on. You’ll either stay friends or go your separate ways. Keep it light and breezy, and hopefully that’ll alleviate some of the tension