It's selfish and entitled. Poor planning on her planning doesn't constitute and emergency on anyone else. That's the point.

I hate entitled people, and this is the definition of it.

Howcome two?

This is nothing ;). Last week we made it to the airport 25 minutes before take off and still made it through to the flight at one of the largest and busiest airports in the country. Will never do it again.

I’ve lost a switch and a Wii U. My Wii U was broke when my son was around 3. The switch was a few years later.

I’m not in the US and I won’t be able to have any contact with my daughter if she leaves my country.

I can provide alimony to support the raising of my daughter overseas but I think my country is a better environment for child rearing also.

I fucked up as a human being and a husband but I love my daughter more than anything and I honestly think that I could give her a good loving and supporting upbringing (not that anyone will believe me)

What the hell is wrong with you?

Thank you. I know I have no right to ask for another chance to be in my wife’s life.

I ruined that completely and forever.

I wish more than anything that my daughter could have both my wife and I in her life, but for a number of (perfectly understandable) reasons, staying in my country is not an option for my wife.

If it becomes a choice between my country and my wife’s country I honestly think my country would be better for the upbringing of a child. I also think that I could provide a loving and supportive upbringing

I failed as a husband but I love my daughter more than anything and I honestly think that I could be a good father.

I know that nobody will ever believe it. My shame is eternal

[deleted]

You are forgetting the alimony and child support you will be paying. Upwards of 60% of your 200k income. That leaves mom and daughter $120k a year… plenty to live on.

If you continue to be selfish.. you will fight that. But if you want to do whats right for them, and truly feel guilty for your actions, you won’t.

Thanks

Yeah I wish I'd done that. Thanks

Thanks

I could provide money but it’s not only that. I think my country provides a better environment for children. My sins aside I also think I’d provide her with a loving home.

I know that nobody will ever believe me but I would never make a third mistake. It’s too late for my wife (understandably) but I can only work to improve from here

Yeah, I debated on posting it, but I rarely get to contribute so I did!

Hey man. I know this is going to get downvoted but please ignore these comments. People who cheat while you should be ashamed of yourself --- doesn't mean you're/you'll be a bad father.

You definitely should BE in your daughter's life. Your daughter deserve to have her father in her life. Now, you need to show her that while two people don't belong with each other --- you guys can still be a family and work together because the love for your daughter is greater.

While your wife has every right to leave, I think she is being selfish here about moving to another country while she has a kid with you. IMO -- once you have kids, it is about your kids. Kids deserve to have close proximity within reason to both of their parents.

To be honest, while yes... your mistakes ruined your marriage as it should. Cheating while selfish doesn't constitute you to lose the right to parent and be in your child's life. Hopefully, you can talk to your soon to be ex wife about this and compromise on something.

You made mistakes that caused a lot of pain and suffering for someone you married. Doesn't mean you're evil.The important thing is to be a better human. Keep your head up and don't demonize yourself too much. It's important to continue to work on yourself.

My ability to provide for her is more than just money. I think my country provides the better child environment and my sins aside I would be able to provide her with a nice loving home

You’ve already proved your selfishness twice. Any you really think the best thing is for your daughter to be with you? You will be selfish again, but instead of hurting your (soon to be ex) wife, you will be hurting your daughter. Let your wife take your daughter, and give her all the love and care she does. The best thing you can do for everyone right now is to get some therapy for yourself. After the therapy helps you, you can start to work on your relationship with your daughter.

Since you needed to point out your $200k job, let me point something out. In most places in the US, a divorcing mother with child custody can get upwards of 60% of your income. So you will be cutting that income down to closer to 60k…. And if you love your daughter, and feel bad for your actions against your wife…. You won’t fight this

Edit: spelling

TIFU hate comment:

A woman is open about her experiences. I must let the world know she is wrong

-cringe virgin with throwaway account

because you sound like half of the time to be bragging about the injury

I'm sorry bud, but... it isn't. From everything you've said, you're putting how you feel above what's best for her.

You want her to stay because you love her, and you feel like you can't live without her. Yes, you have money right now, but you've said that your wife is a better caretaker and has a closer bond to the child. If you were putting your daughter's needs before your feelings, you'd let her live with her mother, and provide financial support.

If the wife will be living with her parents, it's possible they can also help with raising the child. She won't be living alone in some dumpster, she'll have family that can care for her.

It's hard, but put your feelings aside. You can support financially and let her live with the more capable parent. It isn't a case of 'one or the other'.

Omg a hate comment? Here in my humble post? Blushing.

My actions certainly point that way. You’re probably right.

I can’t ever fix this situation but I can do the best I can to provide the best for my daughter. I hate that it will hurt my wife more but I don’t think she’ll have the means or the time to raise 1 let alone 2 children. She’ll just scrape by

Such a wholesome TIFU.

Pay child support and alimony then, Mr “I’m so well off”

Life lesson: An employer NEVER needs the details, it's none of their business. You just say:"I'm not well enough to come in today".