Maybe she found your reddit account and how you've been leaving a fuck load of comments on porn subs for at least a year.

You’re right, the gender of the people doesn’t matter at all, but they are still gendered humans so using gendered language to describe them is fairly normal communication.!

Your comment adds nothing to the topic or the conversation, congrats

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If I didn't go snooping I'd have never found out about my ex wife, I was sad at first but it gave me the chance to find someone who actually loves me. It'll take some time.

It's game over bro.

It’s over man, even if she’s done with the other guy whatever you had over the last 10-20 years obviously didn’t mean anything to her after a certain point. Take care of yourself and the kids and move on

Given his attitude about the situation and his kids being taken, it seems both parties have contributed to this one sided story he's giving

dump that shit, not worth your time any longer. she's not your woman anymore, probably never was, sad, i know, ive been there too.

She's already gone and probably already cheated... physically. You may be able to recover from this with therapy and a lot of work and love, but you may not want to.

Right NOW you do want to fix things. Probably more than anything else in the world. It's probably really hard to let yourself see how unhappy you've been as well.

Probably the best thing my ex wife could have done for me was the thing that hurt me most in my life. She refused to try and repair our relationship after cheating while I begged for resolution. We divorced after 2 years of torment, and I made some incredible life changes that I could have never made with her. In hindsight, she was fiercely holding me back

Don't do that to yourself. Clear your head and talk to a lawyer.

Often, men get short changed, and I personally would have been had I just gone with an attitude like this.

They will give everything to her like you request, and make your life miserable in the process, and frankly, your kids deserve two happy parents post-divorce, not one. And that won't happen if you just simply give it all up.

Fair

Judging by OP's comment history, I would be checked out too. Tons of cringy comments on various porn subreddits.

Leave. This woman doesn’t love you at all and there is no way your relationship has any future.

Prepare the divorce already and focus on yourself and your kids.

Time you prepare the evidence that she is cheating so she gets nothing when its actually over

Or.. this reads as a kid who is trying to karma farm.. idk man, something is off about all this but forgive me if I'm wrong

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That's a peculiar way to say you hate your kids.

She only says she doesn't talk to him. Anything else would just mean that she has to manage your reaction.

She has cheated, and she is never coming back. I think you need to go to r/SupportforBetrayed. Nobody goes to a hotel to play scrabble with someone they have been sending flirty texts.

Have you thought about what is wrong in the relationship from her point of view? Do you do your share in your house? Does she carry the full mental load of everything regarding the kids, the household, the pets, the finances? Are you one of those people who leaves the glass in the sink instead of putting it in the dishwasher cause you couldn’t be bothered to check if the dishwasher was was dirty or clean? And if it was clean you don’t want to be bothered to empty it? Does she have to ask you to do everything or do you step right in and take out the trash when you notice it’s full? Do you know the names of your kids teachers, friends, doctor and babysitter? Do you ever schedule anything for them? Doc apt, dental cleaning, play date, summer camp? Do you both work outside the home? If so are you really doing your share at home? How about money? Do you treat money fairly and with respect and together plan your future? Have you taken her out to dinner or cooked her dinner lately? Or on a date? Or bought her a present or flowers?Given her a compliment? Have you kept care of yourself? Hygiene, health, teeth, clothing? Do you support women’s rights and let her know you do? Have you asked her what is missing? Maybe she is gone, maybe not. But give it a shot and at least be the best person, Dad and partner you can be. I think women start to view their partner as another child and it is a buzz kill. Woman want a grown-up partner, we need our needs filled too and when we don’t have it we may look around. Not saying this is your case but if it is, start stepping up for you, for her and for your kids.

That's what I'm hoping what happens, she is not a open person so I hope this time she is. Ikr always divorce and get a lowery now. True true

Waaaaaiiiittttttt

Weirdly enough, this isn't your fault. You had suspicions, and you acted on them. In a healthy relationship, spouses should have no issues sharing their communications with others to their SO. Look, it took me a long time to get over this simple truth, but you can't control how other people feel about you, all you can do is react to the information you're given. She made her choices, and there wasn't anything you could have done to prevent it. The only person who had control over this was her.

If this is all true, and you mean that, grow the hell up,

You're a parent. Act like it.

My kids will be good no matter what they are strong, plus if we do split, i already know where they will stay, and i will always provide for them. Oh ya, im bad, very insecure, and I was too clingy. At times, I wasn't always the best husband. I wanted to talk but she never wanted to talk which let to now. I am by no means completely innocent but I never cheated.

She bailed on your marriage. This wasn't bait you found this was straight forward evidence that she's cheating. This back and forth arguing isn't necessary, if you 2 thought of only being together and only together for life, she's broken the contract with you, definitely move one, we all each get one life to live. Game over....