What age are y’all? Cause autism or not, this sounds like jr high drama.

We had to take our daughter to the hospital and the X-ray tech was… fine. Like… FIIIIIINE. Holy cow. This was years ago, and I’m still fan-girling over him.

I told my husband me and the tech would make beautiful babies.

What did my husband do? Laugh and agree!

And my husband is autistic. So not sure that I see how that has anything to do with anything here.

EXACTLY WTF!!! I THOUGHT I WAS THE ONLY ONE

But she wasn't getting spanked. She was getting whipped with a belt by a grown man that is supposed to love, guide, and care for her, and it's apparently not the first time. She's clearly apprehensive and scared of him when he's angry. She says that her mom has been calling her a bitch, so she also seems to be regularly called demeaning insults and cursed at by at least her mom, another person who is supposed to love, guide, and care for her. So she's being physically and verbally abused. It's no wonder she's not very engaged with her school work.

Edit: I do think spanking is abuse, though. If they're too young to reason with, why are you hitting them? If they're old enough to reason with, why are you hitting them? It's wrong to hit your spouse to correct their behavior, so why is it okay to hit children? You don't hit your employees to correct their behavior, so why is it okay to hit your children?

What you said and your reasoning for saying it was NOT a social faux pas! What you said was totally normal and fine, and is something couples do all the time! My S/O and I (who is also autistic) love talking about hot people! We've made entire lists of movies to watch together just because they star our favorite celebrities! :P Sure it's led to us watching some crappy movies, but never to a fight because we trust each other, and know that there's not a chance in hell we'd leave one another for a celebrity (or someone who looks like one) <3 It sounds like your boyfriend was the one acting out of line here, although I understand that having low self-esteem can be rough to deal with. Jealousy is a natural reaction, but what isn't right is the way he's making you feel bad about it :( You did nothing wrong, and you sound like very sweet and loving partner <3

Has he looked into therapy, or anger management classes?

Show him this Reddit post.

My parents have been married over 30 years, they call out people they find attractive all the time lol. If you don't mean it in a negative way it shouldn't be an issue. I think he just needs to grow as a person and be more comfortable with himself.

I know of someone who did

Honey, if you didn't say it to hurt him, then this is NOT your fault whatsoever! How he responded initially was going to be a toss up, and you hadn't planned on what his reaction was. His continued anger is completely on him. My mother has ALWAYS had a celebrity crush or two, and my dad ENABLES it. Do NOT feel bad for who you are/ how you see the world around you. Do NOT feel bad for finding someone you will probably never meet attractive and trying to speak about it to an SO. This is NORMAL and if you mean no harm by it, they shouldn't take offense and gaslight you into thinking you do. You should be able to communicate almost anything to your partner. This situation is completely on him and I really hope you have this in a box of possibly leaving your partner unless he rectifies and apologizes for his behavior. I am so sorry you feel bad about this but I promise you, you've done absolutely nothing wrong.

F

When you get into a relationship, it doesnt mean no one else is attractive anymore. It is just that you learn this attractive one is for you only. You can still fine others attractive, just that you are no longer available.

There is a huge difference, kind of like boy friend and boyfriend. That little bit of space makes all the difference in the world.

Straight pipe baby!

boyfriend sucks and you're beating yourself up over nothing

God, it sucks you have to put up with that.

It’s a process. Naturally there’s communication issues given the circumstances but it’s a step that may or may not have been taken too soon.

My advice, given the situation, stop with the shorthand and text everything out. You and him, so there’s no grey area.

You’ll both be fine, and tell him or remind him you’re not going anywhere unless he asks you to, and let time prove itself out.

Good luck.

From your post I can tell he’s important to you. I’m just a stranger on Reddit so take this as you should any advice on the internet. I would try to find out why this would trigger him so bad. It’s good to be sensitive to someone’s triggers, but he also has to try to work on his own. You had no malicious intent with your comment. He needs to recognize that. The problem is his to fix. You can help him. That is one of the things that help build a good relationship. Ultimately though, he has to be the one to get over it and try to work on himself. If he can’t, then you run the possibility of spending the rest of your time together walking on eggshells trying to not upset. That will have a negative impact on your self esteem. Don’t do that to yourself.

I think you might be overthinking things. Hurt feelings aren't the end of the world.

You gave him all the information he needs to understand the situation & feel better, which is that you were just kidding and you are sorry.

It is now up to him to handle his emotions.

It's not your job to make him feel better - it's also not possible - that's something only he can do. It might take him a little time, and you should respect his need for time, but he'll be okay.

Let me know if there's anything you want me to explain more clearly, I'm glad to do it!

[removed]

You didn’t fuck up. He’s just an overly sensitive piece of work.

Human nature is to notice beautiful things, people included. You didn’t cheat on him, you didn’t do anything wrong.

Let him wallow in his own self pity for a while.

What should I do? How should I go about this situation if I'm not in the wrong, i feel like I am, I don't know what to do and I dont want him to be sad. I don't want to fight.

[removed]

FYI…being autistic has nothing to do with your BF’s reaction. His lack of self esteem and maturity isn’t your fault. Making an observation that a celebrity is “hot” should not trigger an emotionally mature person. You did not FU today. I get the being autistic can make you miss emotional and social cues, but this isn’t one of them. My wife finds certain celebs hot. I find certain ones hot. We talk about it and laugh. Don’t get manipulated into feeling guilty.

Been married for 7 years. I also have body issues and anxiety. My spouse and I call out hot people all the time together. Sounds like his issues run pretty deep.

As far as you feeling bad, you made an oops and you've apologized I assume. He should get over it and not hold it against you if he really likes you instead of using it as a crutch.

I hope things get better between you two. Don't beat yourself up over it.

Creaming contest!

You did nothing wrong - if someone can't take it if you say you find someone attractive, that is their problem not yours

I was home for that long because of the pandemic, noticed right as we went back... O.o