That's not racism, it's homophobia and/or transphobia.

I guess you're stupid as well as an asshole?

Yeah I did that, he hasn’t replied yet and idk if he’s read it even.. But yeah I guess I can’t do much more than that

This is not a normal black eye. A normal black eye is swollen right away but usually doesn’t look fully bruised until the next day.

Think of the number of color changes a bruise goes through. How it looks small when it’s purple, but when it’s in the green phase, somehow it continues to spread. This is not a couple days. This is a couple weeks.

Put ice on it now and any time you aren’t working. Keep your head elevated above your heart. The inflammation itself will take a few days to go down, but that bruise is epic.

Just say your sorry and that you didn't think before posting it and you did not mean to hurt him. Mistake is a mistake..

Too bad I'm packing deringer.

>She helped, I said thanks, she went home.

She probably couldn't wait to leave.

Have you and your girlfriend ever established such boundaries? For most people, hugging someone else than your partner is okay, for some it's not okay tho. If you ever talked about it and said its not okay, you should tell her and excuse, be honest and talk about it. It shouldn't be a big deal. If you never talked about it, then it's probably time to do so, she'll probably think it's fine

I'm picturing the Ned Flanders squeal 😂

There are all these stories of people laughing during sex and just stopping and not continuing. Idk why you wouldn't just try again after you finish laughing, if you can't laugh during sex what's even the point? XD

> Hopefully it doesn't look too bad when I'm waiting tables tomorrow

Just don't invite your cousins to the restaurant.

As well as that general guide, here’s a more specialised one from eye doctors in the US.

https://www.aao.org/eye-health/diseases/black-eye

Haha it’s something we’ve said for years as a joke, buggered if I know where it came from, lol.

Look, read the page, it gives you some guidance as to when you should go to the doc. If you have any further questions I’m happy to clear up what I can- considering that I’m not there.

Haha, was that a pirate reference?

In any case, thanks! Do you think I should get it looked at tomorrow? Or do you think I should be fine?

Matey, that’s not getting better or going down any time soon.

Here’s a good, legit guide to your black eye! (Trust me, I’m a nurse, lol)

https://www.healthdirect.gov.au/amp/article/black-eye

This. Find and doctor and help yourself and your mother by being mentally healthy, a mothers happiness comes mostly from her kids being ok, they are that amazing

Bro, you're that swollen you won't be able to see out of one of your eyes for a few days, plus, if I was your boss, I'd rather a heads up "hey, knocked my eyebrow today, got a bit of a bruise, happy to still come in but it's not pretty. OK if I wear an eye patch?" rather than you rocking up looking like you lost a round to Muhammad Ali. As a patron, I'd be worried for the kid who's serving me with a massive black eye swollen shut.

I'm not a doc, but see how it's already blooming down one side of your eye? I think it'll probably bruise the whole way round. I wouldn't be surprised if you copped your eye a bit too. You'll probably wake up with a throbbing headache tomorrow.

You do you, bro. It'll definitely get worse before it gets better. Keep up the ice packs and pain relief. See a doc if the swelling doesn't subside in a few days.

Thanks. How much worse do you think the bruise will get? Do you think it'll spread below my eye?

As to working, I definitely need to work, and since we're short-staffed tomorrow, I don't think calling out is an option. I'm also a little worried about working with an eyepatch on and not being able to see out of one of my eyes, but I would like to avoid scaring people. Does it look that bad that people will be scared by it?

Own it bro. I'm 39m and stuttered since I could talk. Use to get embarrassed by it, but now could care less. People I know joke at me and if it's funny I'll laugh back. If it's not ill say something like "common, that wasn't even clever. 2 thumbs d-d-down."

These are people I know so no biggie. People trying to get under my skin...? Whole dif post.

Sounds like a funny event. Not funny at ur expense just silly. Laugh with her about it. Make other sceneries up like "next time I hope I doesn't happen when I'm telling u I'm about to c-c--cum. Awe... to late."

Mate, you need to sit up and ice that bitch!

Try sleep sitting up and when you can get some Arnica cream on the bruise on your eyebrow (try keep it away from your eyes) it'll draw the bruise out making it worse, but then getting better quickly.

Try take some anti inflammatories (ibuprofen or whatever the US equivalent is) sleep with a cool wet flannel (if you can sleep with a fan on to keep the flannel cool if that works)

If you're worried about needing to work, see if your boss will let you get away with an eye patch at least then you can work without scaring your customers.

(plus, see if your increasingly outlandish stories about how it happened gets you better tips)

Good luck bro, next time just avoid turkies and tables!

You should have done it in the Unreal announcer voice

[removed]

Haha, not in any relationship right now. I can't imagine having a black eye is going to help my chances either lol

It’s gonna get a tad worse before it gets better, just tell everyone at work you walked into a door as your new boyfriend sits in a dark corner slowly nodding his head

How bad did yours look compared to mine? And how long did it last for?

I had a face injury last year on November. It kept swelling and generally sucked for like 2-3 days, then stayed swelled for like almost 2 weeks, and finally started noticeably going down.

Maybe yours isn't as bad as mine, but it'll definitely still be very swollen tomorrow.