I don't understand what you mean? Please explain.

What you're doing is ignoring the precise nature of the debunking of AGP

Something can exist all over the world and still be rare. Like you can have a rare genetic disease that exists in almost every country of the world but is still extremely rare. But I feel like you're focusing on something I've already clarified and ignoring the actual point of my original comment.

"exist everywhere" implies frequent

ITS NONE OF THEIR FUCKING BUSINESS!! LMFAO. Sharing your personal business is for children…learn the hard way why this will bite you in the ass one day… fuckin reddit smh

Yeah it is what? I didn't say it wasn't rare. It very likely is. Many things are rare or unusual but exist all over the world.

Yeah it is. If it does exist it's excessively rare the way you phrase it.

OK, say the person who coined the term autogynephilia is wildly misguided in their understanding of the subject and is talking shit, which is clear. That doesn't debunk the reality that there are absolutely people who feel sexually aroused by the idea or image of themselves as the opposite gender and 'autogynephilia' is the word we all use to describe that fetish. Call it autogynephilia or call is something else but those people exist all over the world. So the theories of the person who coined the term have been thoroughly debunked, but the fact that people with that particular fetish exist everywhere absolutely hasn't.

Here’s the real problem with sharing salary info. Employees act like toddlers most of the time. It causes unnecessary drama and bitterness. If one person thinks they do more work, but are paid less, they will usually start doing less, or not caring. The only way to remedy that is to fire and start over, another pain.

It has nothing to do with inequality.

Have you ever thought not everyone is from 'murica and might have different laws? Probably not ...

Oh great, I’m glad if I can contribute something helpful to the conversation! I think like a lot of things this topic is kind of gray area. In my experience, where it’s been OK, was when it was kind of a personal decision between two individuals who had a reason to want to share it, and hopefully know each other well enough to think they can probably handle the answer.

But you never really know, it might turn out to be a bad decision. I’ve certainly shared this info with close colleagues before, and sometimes it was useful. Sometimes it was asked and answered in light of upcoming salary negotiations, between two work buddies. But I’ve also seen that very same thing lead to really bad work conditions, with, like, constant bad vibes and sniping and factions and shit.

So, it’s not very common, you know? People just kind of shy away from it. And I don’t think that’s all because of some propaganda campaign by the bosses.

Not a TIFU. This is a today your boss fucked up.

You don't have to do anything except point out that management decided not to give other coworkers the same bonus and everybody should fight to get what they deserve. In this situation, you don't have to be enemies at all, just say you feel bad and will help where you can to make sure everybody sees the unfair payment schemes

In the future, don't assume everybody makes the same amount, but do use that as a reason to know as much as possible about what they do make. It's the best way to stay competitive and know your worth. If you don't make as much as people who provide less, start looking for another job.

That's fair, and you've made me think deeper about it. I would personally still choose to share, and I would hope my fellow employee would be smart enough to not take it out on me for no reason if they felt they were receiving a less than desirable amount.

It’s a human nature thing. Every time she looks at this guy, she’s going to think about that $20,000. It’s going to be awkward. I mean maybe not, you never know! Maybe she’ll take this as a learning moment and realize she should stop being late and put in more effort, look up to big bonus guy as a role model, it could happen. But odds are, awkward, at a minimum. Could get worse too, I’ve seen it happen.

People get jealous. It’s human nature. In an ideal world, sure, everyone would instantly unionize the minute they found out Sheryl at the register was getting two dollars an hour more than them. But that’s not what’s going to happen. It’s just going to make things weird now between you and Sheryl, who you used to like.

Why would she be mad at OP? How does that put a strain on the relationship? It's good information to know, now she knows she might have to look for another job or change something

I didn’t tell anyone they couldn’t share salaries, and at the time I would’ve felt exactly the same as you. I still do I guess, I certainly wouldn’t forbid someone from doing it.

But the drama involved one person quitting, trying to steal my business plan and customers, and failing after discovering all the things I brought to the equation that he simply didn’t have and couldn’t come up with. God that guy was a bitter, self centered asshole. They took another employee with them, who definitely didn’t get paid that good salary I offered for the next 10 years, unlike the four who stayed. But on top of those real world consequences, there was just a lot of venom and drama and bad vibes about it all between the various employees, when there was absolutely no call for it. Lasted like a year and a half, and the job went from super pleasant and fun to being kind of a pain in the ass for everyone that whole time.

Like, for an example- imagine if the colleague in OPs story above took it extra personal, and started sabotaging OP every chance she could. Now multiply that by everybody in the company knowing everybody else’s salary.

Again, I personally would never try to force someone who worked for me to not share this information. But doing so has consequences, and not just to the boss, but also to the people who share. I think it’s just a human nature thing to be honest, and that’s why it’s a bit of a tradition to keep your mouth shut about this stuff.

I mean I don't know how bad this drama got but I still think it would be wrong to forbid employees from sharing that knowledge, and that it would be very strange to not share what I make if someone asked me as an employee, since I'm not the one that decided that salary or the salary of the person asking. People getting bent out of shape is their prerogative.

I was, in fact, a boss for about 14 years. Ran my own business, started with six employees, had 30 at the height of things, and ended with 10, most of them the same ones I started with. And yes, I went through a bunch of drama with this “people know each other’s salaries“ thing. There was nothing wrong with anybody’s salary, everyone was very well paid, well above average. The problem was that everybody’s salary wasn’t literally exactly the same. People got bent out of shape about it, even though everybody was getting a perfectly good salary, and the reasons for the differences in salary were totally fair and reasonable, basically being based around who had been working with me the longest, building things up from the beginning, and who were the new guys walking into a steady job with a steady salary.

It caused a lot of drama, and this post kind of reminded me of it. You can dismiss what I’m saying, but read the post.

Seriously.

Imo this is why most ppl detransition.

Found the boss lol. If I were her and doing a shit job I'd still want to know I'm making less, so I can better myself or look elsewhere. And if I was OP I wouldn't feel too bad, they're not the one paying her less. And feeling a bit awkward at work is hardly a good reason not to share.

You just read one. Chances are the two people in this post will never comfortably work together again. Every interaction they have from now on will be charged with this knowledge of the gap in payment levels.

Also note, he does give some valid reasons why the colleague is getting less money than him. I’m sure she doesn’t see it that way, but maybe everybody else in the room does.

On the other hand, OP clearly feels like it’s a fuck up on his part, and the truth is his working relationship with this colleague will never again be comfortable.

If you’re wondering why they tell you not to tell your coworkers what you make, you are now reading one example of why they say that.

Because they fear their boss will find out and they’ll be punished even though it’s protected by law