“Father said I’m not welcome on the group call as I am not interested in having a relationship with brother. I would still like to talk to you directly though.

You don’t have to have some nuclear level issue to end a relationship. You can just realize it’s not a good fit. You guys started dating in your teens and you’ve grown and changed and he hasn’t. That doesn’t make him a horrible human, it just means that he’s not a good fit for you anymore.

Just…call your mom and tell her what happened? This doesn’t seem very complicated. 🤷‍♀️

Just because you’ve sunk 6 years into this relationship, don’t think you need to keep doing so.

He’s 24. If he hasn’t gotten serious about being an adult by now, you may be waiting til the end of time. Is that someone you really can see a future with?

And to be clear, I’m not saying it’s about money. I (44F) make a lot more than my partner. But my partner still has a work ethic and is fiscally responsible.

I wasn’t the reason the guy got kicked out of the friend group. No one else in the group knew about my experience. I simply told my partner I didn’t want to be alone with the guy.

You do you, but you asked for opinions and in mine, I think you’re being kind of silly to not even meet the gal. If you meet her and she’s seriously not your cup of tea and you can’t possibly be in her presence, we’ll then fine. But to me it’s like when my partner’s kid says “I hate that, won’t eat it” when he hasn’t even taken a taste and assumes that something green is an onion vs a granny smith apple. Yeah, they look alike but they aren’t the same.

I mean…fundamentally, you shouldn’t do anything you don’t want to do. Your free time is yours to use as you wish and you’re not required to meet or hang out with anyone.

That said, based on your follow up comments, you’ve been invited to a group get together where this friend is one of many who will be present. It’s not a one on one situation. If you need to “like” everyone who shows up for a party else you won’t go, you’re going to have a pretty bland social life.

I also think it’s kind of weird to prejudge someone to the point you won’t even meet them for something so basic as she posts racy photos of herself online. If she was a racist or a homophobe or something major? Okay, yeah that I would understand. But if your partner considers this person a good friend, I’d hope his judgment is pretty good and this is a person you can get along with.

My partner had a friend I didn’t much like after I met him. I told my partner I didn’t want to be alone around the guy. Within a few weeks of my experience, the guy was pretty much excommunicated from the friend group. Aside from that dude, I’ve never met a friend of my partner’s that I couldn’t at least tolerate as he has pretty good judgment.

Why are you worrying about something that hasn’t happened?

If he begins ignoring you and becomes an alcoholic, you leave. It’s pretty simple.