I tend to prefer salaried to hourly. There's a lot of fuckery that can go on with hourly positions if they ever hit financial straights where you could find your "salary" reduced by 25%. Bonuses and overtime aren't guaranteed. Depending on the type of job, it can also cause problems if you need to put in a little extra time to fix a fuckup you did - there are times I've been salaried and really thankful I didn't have to explain exactly what I was doing hour to hour.

I would be a bit concerned about taking a promotion at a similar pay to a lower position. I would assume the promotion means more work. It will also be that much harder to make more money in the future - since there is one less rung on the ladder to climb up. The other place might give you the ability to work your way up. Also, you threatened to leave to get the promotion - if this was done eagerly, it could show you were valued... but if it was begrudgingly, you might not be in good standing anymore - so read the room. I would question either way why this position wasn't made available earlier to you - you know, before you thought about leaving.

In the end though, I think it comes down to what you think of the job. After all, if you like the people or work style or job or company more - you are probably going to be more successful at the job - and that will translate to more money down the road.

The TIFU was committing a low key version of embezzling from you SO. As a SAHP, you should have access to your own money - you are taking on a role that would cost money if you didn't do it (A LOT!!!) - he just happens to be doing the role that brings in the money. However, that really should be a mutually agreed thing (ideally before you quit your job). Your approach probably cost a fair amount in interest - so the deception not only was emotional, but has a real financial cost too.

You really have to look at your finances and the location and time of year:

I would start with your friend group to see if anyone in the area is looking for a place. I think it's ideal to co-sign and start the lease together. Equal footing etc. From there, it's just like normal apartment hunting, but the other person has to agree.

Second choice is finding someone who already has an established place and a free room. Either you jump on the lease at the renewal or your sign a subletting agreement. Friend of friends is better, but craigslist, or local college boards can help. If you have any hobbies, also check in with any groups/clubs/message boards in the denver area.

Your last option is to go in an get a place on your own, and then find a roommate to sublet to. Make sure the landlord is okay with it. Upside is you can establish the apartment how you want it, and your potential roommate can see how you live. Downside is you'll be eating the cost for at least a month or two most likely.

If you go the craigslist route (or any sort of message board): Some things I've learned. Write like a goddmann human being. So many postings get jotted off with spelling errors and no information. Don't write a book, but give information you would want to know when looking. When you get responses, don't bother responding to one-liners "I'm interested" etc. Only engage with responses from people who sound like humans. And remember, if it's too good to be true, it's a scam. If you think "is this a scam" - it's a scam.

Seems like you could afford it since you can scale back your retirement if you find it pinching the budget too much.

However, I'd suggest going with the roommate situation if you're in your twenties and moving to a new city. This will let you live in a nicer area and split a lot of costs (internet, heating, cleaning supplies) that don't become twice as much when you get a roommate. If you don't get along great with your roommate, take a part time job, or start taking classes etc. Worst case scenario you feel out the city and can weigh the cost vs location etc while saving up more money. Best case scenario, the roommate situation works out and you renew your lease.

I would into FIRE more closely for strategies. I know very little about it, but one thought would be wanting to diversify your saving strategies since you may end up wanting to withdraw from your retirement before you reach retirement age. Plus a large savings could help with things like buying a home down the line.

Exactly. If you ever get rid of a computer, it's worth spending the money on a program that will right over the files methodically with null files. Alternatively, just encrypt your device when you first set it up and you should be fine (though encryption could be broken at some point in the future).

Call AAA - it's not cheap, but you can have their services come out even if you're not a member (you may have to join). My parents canceled their family AAA membership without telling me and I got a dead battery - I was still able to get the battery service to come out, albeit for an additional charge.

A bad battery with a few dead cells will still operate a vehicle, but won't hold a charge for very long, possibly resulting in it frequently dying. You should still be able to jump it - though I would get the battery tested ASAP. I jumped my last car a bunch of time, and it can damage electrical components over time.

I moved here in my early 30s and did a terrible job at meeting people. Having kids worked wonders - but if I did it again:

I'd show up to howard county striders (running group) every week and hang around for bagels after. They are out there literally every week, and a great group. Alternatively, there are a bunch of sports leagues and exercise classes out there worth checking out. Some (like Barre) attract younger people, where as the kettlebells class I did with my wife, we were the youngest by at least a decade or two.

Check out Columbia Associate AND Howard County Parks and Rec to see what types of classes are offered. There is a bunch of stuff targeted at adults that could be fun and a great way to meet people.

There are a lot of volunteer groups too. Find something you care about and show up every week.

Howard county community college does have classes available for reasonable prices that aren't college centered (art, photography etc).

A friend of mine travels from a few towns over to be part of the Howard County Orchestra... granted, you need some real talent.

You could always consider getting a part time job at a brew pub or seasonal job at retail in the area.

All the highly rated Indian places do great vegetarian food. Clarksville common has that Bahn mi place where you can their sandwich with impossible meat. Regional usually has done great vegetarian options. Traveling out of HC, look up Ahadu or Tigi for take out (or any Ethiopian places in DC to eat in) for incredible vegetarian and vegan options.

Sorry, but Mexican is lacking, and the ones we have tend to be basic on vegetation and lack vegan

I kind of wish the data for density and GDP was higher resolution.

We had Rojas deliver our first, and I absolutely Adore the man.

One alternative is to go with cornish game hens. Buy two, and it's like a mini turkey. The "left behind" thanksgiving I went to when I first moved to MD did this since they weren't sure how many people were coming. The 2020 Thanksigiving it was just my family (4 of us, only 2 eating meat).

If you can find them fresh, do a simple brine the day before and the cook up pretty quickly. Much less involved than a turkey or even a chicken.

Most houses in that range are going to be on the quieter side of things. Traffic in Columbia tends to flow to major roads, so aside from the downtown or merryweather district, the traffic inside neighborhoods isn't too bad.

"Good" schools is going to be really subjective. Some of the highest ranked ones have minimal diversity. And, while there will be lots of opportunities for your kids, there will also be a lot competition for them and within them. Some parents prefer smaller schools for that reason. Either way, a good gauge is to look at the percentage of parents in the PTA.

As far as neighborhoods being good for kids - again this is going to be your preference and how you raise your kids. Columbia Assessed (part of the Columbia Association) properties tend to be on a network of wonderful biking/walking trails with tot-lots for kids. The houses will be older (60s-70s) and the lots smaller, plus you get an extra tax. I think it's all worth it, since this can build a sense of community within in your neighborhood. Conversely - some people prefer to move into the new-builds. Houses and yards are bigger, no CA fee, and if you can find one of the newer neighborhoods there will be more kids.

And, after doing all the research, know that school zoning does and will change.

It's just a common turn of phrase used by Incels. Not sure if you're oblivious to that, or just being defensive in the "not all men" vein of responses.

There isn't anything wrong with "females" as a term inherently, but it is a more clinical term and you find it a lot in really bad pick-up books. The choice of term is meant to dehumanize women (much in the way "girls" can often be used to diminish a woman's standing or accomplishments). It's not necessarily done intentionally, but it plays into a larger trend with the rest of his comment that this guy is pretty down the path to full blown incel.

That isn't any better, but Incels have a habit of using the term "female" in ways that just don't flow normally. Nothing inherently wrong with this, but it is a trend.

Waze does this too. Open the app and it should give you a walking ETA.

If you have Google maps I would still check, since by using Waze, you are in the Google eco system

Did you happen to have google maps up when you parked? If you have your location tracking saved, click your picture (or initial) next to the microphone in the search bar and look at "Your Timeline". Depending on your settings, even if you didn't have maps open, you might be tracking that info.

I'm also chronically lost, so have left that setting on - choosing lack of privacy over forgetting where I've parked my car.

Refers to women as "Female" hangs out with guys who call someone's girlfriend ugly to their face, broke up with a girl because of how attractive he thought other people found her, broke up with again because someone else thought she was weird.... Whoa, future incel here.

The debates were pretty telling. Also, ScottEBlog interviewed a bunch of them. Basically, lots of googling and then checking what the source was against issues I'm well versed in.

Not to mention his quote on how we shouldn't talk about LGBTQ families in school because some people aren't ready to accept that yet.

I've never seen a cake version there (or even honestly heard of anyone making it as a cake before today).

Victoria Gastro Pub has a view of a parking lot, but the space they have enclosed it actually rather nice.

Leelyn near dorsey search has a really wonderful outdoor are and the food is quite good. Service can be on the slow side and you are rather close to 108 so get some road noise. I still really enjoyed it though.

The Corner Stable would work too - it's a view of the KC village center, but as far as they go it's a nice village center.

Clarksville Commons will also have outdoor seating, that is at least not a view of a parking lot.

Dok Khao Thai has the outdoor patio and a view of the green space in the new Merriweather area.

Turn House has views of the golf course

Sonoma Grill is only open for lunch on the weekends, but the patio out back sits right on the trails instead of the parking lot side. I've been meaning to stop there for a beer sometime but never do.

Noise cancelling could, in theory, be done by zoom, but it takes a lot of coordination between speakers and usually a couple of microphones to figure out the distance of the sound and pin point what to cancel out (both in terms of the headphones and the microphone side of noise canceling). This is why Apple was able to get noise canceling microphones on calls faster than android - they only had to deal with one physical phone. Either way - you can purchase noise canceling microphones - though researching it is a pain since "noise canceling" in headphone refers to the playback side of things, and OP would want the microphone side. They do exist though.

Edit: found this article with some suggestions - https://expertworldtravel.com/best-noise-cancelling-microphones/

The goal is to change people's minds, it's to motivate them to get out and vote... And more importantly to the DNC donate money. At the end of the day Money almost always dictates who wins.